The Secret Garden

2007-08-14T17:30:00.000-04:00

what a difference a day makes.......

The odd thing about life is that we are constantly reminded to look for the silver lining or gold brick road in every situation we encounter. Some days are harder than others when it seems that the world (or to some, God) is against you, and those moments are defined by some sort of ethereal bad luck cloud hanging over your head. I've known some people that suffer from bad luck... heck, if they didn't have bad luck, they'd have no luck at all. These are people I think of when in the cleansing period of my tantrums. I am programmed to think of some situation worse than my own, which in turn becomes my spiritual benedryl fix. If I didn't have that survival chip implanted at birth (thanks, Mom and Dad!), I'd certainly go mad, for it's the saving grace of my sanity.

There is a cliche about seeing the forest through the trees, and somehow it applies well when one is driven to frustration and anger. We can't see the forest because those big old trees are in the way.... and who knows what's lurking in the shadows there. We forget to step out of the situation and see the picture as a whole, because... after all, we're mad as hell.... and the blinders have gone up. If we can work ourselves past the trees, the goal of the yellow brick road is more attainable. It's not easy with it's demanding schedule, but it is a gain for our karma box when we learn how to count to ten again, or take that deep sigh and forge forward. A simple breath, a simple count, and a straighter head for making the tough decisions. First and foremost: calm down and assess. Then proceed with grace.

The best part of the journey is the friends you make along the way: the heart, the brains, and the courage that walk alongside. Without them the journey is soulless, for it lacks any connection..... and as humans, that is part of our genetic make-up. We may find that solitude can be the garden where we do our best thinking, but with no one ever to share our journey, we become recluse and reckless to our own spirit..... a path of self destruction, if you ask me.

I am fortunate to know many people, and at times they become my heart, brains, and courage along the way.... and we all know how great it can be when someone else takes the helm once in awhile. We may take long breaks from one another, but there is a bonus in that as well. Oh what stories we can tell, and what laughs we have when once connected again...... not to forget the experiences we take away.

That's all life really is.... lessons that grow from the shadows of the trees, and a yellow brick road that leads you to your personal Oz. Tripping over the potholes is a possibility.... heck, it's almost designed that way. However, the friends who skip down the road with you, and pull you back from those thoughtless apple throwing trees make the journey worth the trip. Besides, they have your back when you come up against the nefarious wizards who lurk behind curtains.... or the green faced witches trodden with jealousy. For me, I am thankful that I know some of the most wonderful people who have ever walked the face of the earth..... they have made my journey fruitful in many ways, and still put up with my moments of mad tantrums from time to time. That's a good friend.

Life is back to normal...... I surrendered, took a breathe, and called a friend for help. The computer is now working again, my temper securely back in place. What a difference a day makes..........

2007-08-13T18:30:00.000-04:00

ever have one of those days........

when nothing, and I mean NOTHING goes right? Of course you have, haven't we all? Today is that day for me. No matter what I did (and I had plenty of time with spare left over) to catch up all my errands, chores, duties, and other miscellaneous garbage I line up for myself. This was going to be a day of great accomplishments!

Waking early, I breezed through the regular morning ritual of preparing to get stuff done. A quick trip to the post office, a jaunt by the emissions testing center, a stop at the bank, and then I was on my way to the tag office. It was here that my day came to a complete stop.... and it was only 9:00 am. Since when does the tag office decide to change their open hours to start at 11:00? Well, being a government office I suppose they have that right.... but still???????

Ok..... they have that right.... nothing too drastic that I couldn't rework my hours around them, and I proceeded home to type up orders I had received from the Friday before. (Remember, I was tied up on the blog, and pushed all that work aside?) Well..... the adage of Murphy's Law took effect from there on. Anything that can go wrong, WILL..... and it did. Planting my butt in front of the computer, I typed orders..... only to be stopped by this little spooler sub system that invaded my printing abilities. For the next nine hours I fiddled, tweeked, shut down and rebooted a million times, called Geek Squad (no help there), used microsoft system help support (again, no help there, except to tell me that I needed professional help), and finally let off a barrage of words that would have put a longshoreman to shame. You couldn't shut me up.... and I didn't lose my temper..... I found it. Yes, the temper is alive and well folks. It certainly does exist, and I have the hoarse voice to prove it. Of course that didn't do any good, and I still can't print anything, but I did let off enough steam to thoroughly run the temper dry (for the day, at least).

So what does one do when stuck in a hard place? Turn it into a blog story, of course. Someone please save me from myself............

2007-08-10T21:06:00.000-04:00

it's about time.......

Well then........ isn't EVERYTHING "about" time? Time enough to get things done; time enough to complete your day by sitting back and sighing relief as you check off the many layers of duties you set up for yourself when the dawn first cracked hours earlier. Yeah, sure. Give yourself a pat on the back, you deserve the Atta-boy reward.... heck, you worked hard enough for it, didn't you. Oh..... if only I could be humble enough to accept it, but this is not the case for me, for I have cheated and stolen moments when I could.

Yes, I have been busy..... but everyone else has too. How they keep up with everyday life AND blogging is still a mystery for me. I folded under the pressures of the day and let blogging slip to the side. (I had to fold somewhere, didn't I?) It had nothing to do with slighting anyone or not caring about the new friends I venture to.....it was all about the short 24 hours the day holds. All until today that is. I pushed the work, renovations, ringing phone, family, favorite shows....... (my life in general), all to the margins and decided that a catch-up was in order. Not blogging throws you off the radar, and gets you dismembered from this special little cyberspace club.... and three months away practically guarantees you a headstone.

So rumors of my demise are greatly exaggerated.... and a trip to Mars was not where I headed either. However (on that note) I have traveled to Hell ....or at least the perception I was left with from my Catholic childhood. It is truly HOT here in Atlanta, and the constant traveling in and out of buildings (from cold to hot, to cold, to hot (endlessly), day in and day out) has left me with some wonderful migraine headaches and a feeling of clammy worn-outness. By noon, you can literally wipe the floor with the remains of me. Afternoon quickie snoozes and a few naproxins down the throat, and I felt better enough to do my catering duties, but with little to no brain cells left for thinking or putting two coherent words together to write anything here. Sorry, it wasn't anything personal.... just personal to me. And, of course on my good days, I spent time with my other personal demon: renovations. Yes.... renos again (like I don't get enough with the amount of HGTV I watch.... I have to emulate.)

The good news is that we have been busy with caterings as well..... the bad news is that we have been busy with caterings. A double-edged, multi-dimensional quagmire that still pays the bills, and leaves me with little time to play. Well, let me clarify that just a tad. I still get to play (here and there), but not as much as I used to before I actually owned a business. But I have to admit, this is still the best job (and longest employment) I've ever held anywhere. This June marked my 10th anniversary with this venture.... not too shabby considering I've had a myriad of work opportunities that didn't pan out. It has allowed me to renovate not only the house, but the gardens as well. And if I could only get a little rain here (and not that scattered shower stuff the weatherpeople tease me about), I might have time enough at last to sit back and breathe that sigh of relief that eludes my clutches.

Oh, and did I mention how HOT it was here? It's HOT, HOT, HOT! Now I know why they call my city Hotlanta. The dog days of summer have arrived, and we are seriously in trouble. Not only are the water levels low, but watering flowers has become a skill for the sneaky. Currently I could get in serious trouble if caught watering.... but then, it pays to be nice to my neighbors (which I am). They won't turn me in, but the water police that patrol the town will gladly bust me. As an incentive to turn your neighbor in, they have issued a reward system of $100.00 per actual conviction.... and let me tell you, the state is making a killing on this. The average fine is $200.00 (after the first warning), and shut off on the third violation. Good thing my yard sits under a cloud of heavy maple and oak trees..... it makes the sneaking so much easier. I have found another way to get around "the man", and it includes filling up many plastic gallon jugs of water. How do they know I haven't actually purchased bottled water if I get caught, eh? But then, I have a great relationship with the neighbors, so my worries are minimal at best.

So...... back to time, and all the ticking away that was stolen from my day. I hereby again apologize for the absence to your blogs, the absence to my own blog, and the fact that no matter how well I can multi-task, 24 hours gets shorter everyday. Dammit... it's just not fair!

Well, I haven't typed a word in three months, now you can't get me to shut up. I am my own quagmire. At least I can cross blogging off the list today (finally)..... but then I have to get going anyway. All the reading I did today, and the post here, took me away from my JOB, and now I need to catch up there. Can you believe it's almost 9:00, and I am still answering phones, and taking orders for catering? I still have next weeks caterings to write out...... or maybe I'll just let it slide to the side and finish it up after watering in the morning. After all, tomorrow (Saturday) is another 24 hour day. And besides, the Braves are battling the Phillies tonight. It's 4 to 4 in the 6th. Go Braves! It's the only game I've been able to watch this year so far. Gotta love baseball, and one must really make time to watch a game.

Have a wonderful weekend, y'all!

2007-04-27T14:16:00.000-04:00

an angry letter from a friend......

Neatly tucked into the bedsheets this afternoon, I found a letter from an old friend. Imagine my surprise.......

Dear Ellen~

Ever since you were old enough to pronounce my name, we have been fast friends. Who was there in your deepest hours of despair? It was me.... holding the tissues as you sobbed your latest story of heartbreak or loss of hope. You ran to me freely, and partook of all that I could manage to nourish your soul...... and now, you dump me without a single explaination. What have I done to receive this treatment from you? I deserve a reason....... after all, I was your best friend. ~ Missing our good times together, Chocolate.

Well......... besides the obvious questions I had about Chocolate being able to hold a writing utensil, nevermind write a coherent note, I was taken aback by the confrontation. I don't go out of my way to hurt anyone, and usually avoid all situations that lead to confrontations in the first place. But this deserved a response..... in fact, it was my duty because I had been ignoring the call from refrigerator that seemed to whisper my name every time I walked past it. (Again, another quandry as to how the chocolate sirens could muster such powers.)

So, my response:

Dear Chocolate,

Although I have enjoyed our frequent and wonderful times together, I must admit that you have held me hostage. Throughout the thick and thin areas of my life, you have been the constant that I could always seek refuge in, but now it's time for me to stand on my own.... to find my way without your sweet delictable deliciousness to fall back on. Wihout you, I have gained a willingness to eat healthier, lose the acid reflux, and lose 30 poinds in the process. Why, my nice little size 5's are only a wink away..... and you can't imagine how good that makes me feel. Nothing tastes good as thin feels.

That all said, I do feel your pain. And just to be fair, we shall enjoy a last moment together..... just remember to pour us up a nice tall glass of milk....... I'm on my way.

There....... all settled. Now everybody's happy.

2007-04-24T18:25:00.000-04:00

a beginners recipe........

So here He is.... at the beginning of life as we know it, and for some reason, the spice of life ends up being a canister of Jerks. No, not jerk seasoning.... just plain jerks. And the world is full of them, is it not? Just go out during rush hour traffic, and you can see an abundance of chest thumpers who think nothing of cutting you off on the highway from three lanes over (and no signal other than a middle finger)... or world leaders who practice nefarious deeds to their own populace.

As we ponder the the true calling of our religious beliefs, we cannot help but wonder what our real purpose on this colorful orb is. Were we meant to be the evolved ones, the ones with a higher calling, the ones with the bigger brains to contain knowledge and see that it works? Were we evolved as a species through natural selection, divine intervention, or just sheer luck? Who knows for certain.... but we're here, and our time has been recorded through the efforts of wordsmiths and theologans, thus creating the "age of reason" for our species. It only seems so sad that we tend to basterdize the original recipe.

I am not an athiest, nor part of any organized religion. Many of you who have read here already know this. In fact, I do believe in God.... just not the one you tend to find in religious texts. (He's pretty close, but no cigar.) Perhaps it is because I find that the canister of jerks was held a little too long over the pot, and the bite of their spice overpowers the original intent. They plow over the milder flavors, and to add insult to injury, they do it in the name of their creator through one means or another. Sound familiar? Take our current world events.

We are stuck in this quagmire of a war with people who do not think as we do about God.... heck, they're even sure we're the evil-doers. All because of a difference in religious beliefs. Travel through your history books, and see that this is not the first time this little problem, has surfaced. The list is long. The jerks of the societies always seem to rise to the top, heck, aren't they well versed in supposed qualifications to charm us into being there? That's their job, and we are but their milder flavors. The next step is to prove how holy they are.... in fact, much holier, and with a BETTER God. Yet the destruction and loss of life to prove that point tends to overcook the recipe. Add more insult to injury, and we are also fighting a battle with our own natural resources. Not only do we have a species that can't get along, and feel the best way to keep an enemy at bay is to come up with a bigger bomb, but we have our own planet that's acting up as well. A war on two fronts..... one that could be won if we just learned how to get along to solve the other. But in the blame of a "better" God, we tend to fight the wrong one, and sadly see the facts build up against us in the other. Our priorities are so messed up, that we are throwing away the our existance over a matter of theology. We are ruining the very recipe that makes us the shining entree. Somehow, that didn't seem to be the plan I saw mapped out in Sunday School. Weren't we supposed to live in peace and harmony...... wasn't that surmoned out so well from the priest at Mass? How then do you blame God for the devestation we produce? I think God got an unfair rap, and we haven't taken responsibility for the messes that are man-made.... and there are many of them. Why would this be Gods fault?

That's why I stopped believing in everybody elses God.... the one who I worshiped before I saw how man used His name for their poorly thought out plans. I don't believe in aliens, but could never rule out the possibility that there is more intelligant life beyond our Milky Way. After all, we are only a speck in the vastness of space. That said, I do not believe equally there is a God who sits at the top of the clouds. When I searched for my God, He was no farther than a point to my heart, and the goodness that could be spread from it. I wanted no part of the vengeful Gods positioned in betterment of one another, or the vessels of jerks that peddled what they thought was "the word". I wanted to venture the journey on my own, and feel comfortable with a pleasable God who held no agenda beyond that of doing good deeds.

This past week has been filled with sadness beyond any comprehension. As it joins the long list of senseless acts that man can do to one another, we can only hope that somewhere down the line people will be so disgusted with the carnage, they will seek help (and many meds) to control their psychotic episodes. Too many people have become victims. Too many families have lost a part of their lives.... a part of their hearts. As we learn to heal and overcome the grief.... perhaps we will find ways to overcome the violence.

Only a thought..................

2007-04-20T18:34:00.001-04:00

3rd rock from the sun.....

So here she is in all her glory.... the marble orb that knows where to float in the solar system in order to sustain life. The only orb in our system that can do so. So why do WE (you know, the intelligent ones) find ways to destroy what we have? Not only to the earth, but it's populace. Have we learned nothing? Methinks with the recent shootings that some are just not paying attention..... or just not taking proper meds. And don't even get me started about the war..... that's a whole nother can of worms to post about another day.

This is all we have, there are no other options in the works. So maybe this Earth Day we can make a promise to ourselves to do more to care for what we have.... because we've already witnessed too many times the heartache suffered by the few who wish to destroy. April has it's share of anniversaries to prove that. Waco, Oklahoma City, Columbine, and now Virginia Tech.

Be kind to the earth and it's inhabitants.... we depend so much on one another whether we like it or not.

2007-04-13T14:55:00.000-04:00

it's official......

I need one of these..... but not for lights. Since I am blind to reading any print within a 1 mile radius of my eyes, my glasses need to be in reach 1000 times a day. I can read the letter shirt off a cheerleading flea 5 miles down the road, but without my glasses to read simple print inches from my face, I am lost.

The only problem is, between shoving them down the front of my shirt for easy access, and getting constantly frustrated when they jump out of place, I usually end up losing "sight" of where they are. This is where the clapper would come in very handy for me. Oh, and I probably need one for my keys, as they have a habit of being picked up by gnomes and trolls after I've put them down.

Yes, one of these babies would save me hours of looking for necessary items.

While I rush myself out the door to attend yet another party to cater, I wish everyone a wonderful weekend..... oh, and if you see my glasses, drop me a line. I hate using the spares!

2007-04-08T11:12:00.001-04:00

all dressed up........

The season never changed from year to year, only the size of the clothes, as Easter was a signal that you would get a new outfit to wear........... officially packing away the heavy winter gear of boots and heavy coats. It was my favorite time, as I was dressed to kill in my new dress, bonnet, shoes and gloves. For a fashionista like me, Easter meant new wardrobe. But that was then, and this is now.

For a lapsed Catholic as myself, Easter no longer means clothes..... and it doesn't have too much of the organized religion thing tied into it. Oh, I still like the bunny magic, chocolate eggs, and marshmallow peeps..... but how can one not when every store you walk into has them bursting in the aisles? Yet I walk past them and poo-poo on to the necessary items I need. I have to admit, the smells alone from the aisles are intoxicatingly sweet..... but when you spend 3 months working hard to get rid of the middle age tire around your waist, chocolate bunnies are reserved for those that can eat a whale and never show an ounce. I did falter last night, and ate my first piece of dessert in months. For a self proclaimed sweet tooth as myself, I had a hard time ignoring the cries from the kitchen from that luscious red velvet cake sitting right next to a new gallon of skim milk in the refrigerator. Can there be any more oxy-moronish moments than that? And, of course, I found myself rewarding my good behavior with a nice big slab of red deliciousness.... promising that I'd mow the lawn to take the calories off today. That seems fair, doesn't it?

I no longer buy clothes.... and have actually just revisited my closet for the sizes I had packed away that I thought would no longer fit. How nice and convenient that my shopping travels led me to the most comfortable place on earth for me: my own room. Pretty soon, I will don the ecrudiments of comfortable jeans, a heavy sweatshirt (because of the silly cold snap in our area), and a pair of yard shoes so that I can get out into the much neglected gardens of my yard. The lawn needs a new crabgrass cut, the flowers a look-see for damage (due to the arctic weather visit), and holes covered from the pesky squirrels looking for food. I will not go to Sunday services as other people do, but I will attend a church of higher calling for me.

For those that celebrate the holiday, may your life be filled with many Easter moments, chocolate bunnies, and marshmallow peeps. All others, Happy Spring!

2007-04-06T20:15:00.000-04:00

my bad.........

For all the wonderful people that have stopped over in the past month, I hang my head in shame for not reciprocating to your comments on my last post. You have all been true friends for sending e-mails or calling to see if I were still alive....... and I am here to report that dire news of my demise is greatly exaggerated .

The truth is, I was abducted by the HGTV muses of home improvement. Since my original project was to JUST DO THE KITCHEN, I had a little attack of OCDitis when the paint cans got opened. Suddenly I realized I liked the color SO much, I had to paint a wall in my bedroom a matching shade. Wouldn't my beautiful wrought iron headboard look grand against a nice background of light mint? Yes, since the headboard is white with scrolls, and now pops against the wall. Well...... you just can't do one wall in a bedroom without doing the other three, right? So my bedroom got a makeover as well. And by makeover, I mean the works. I have this theory that includes the thought that once you pull something away from a wall, you MUST dust and vacuum before you return the object to it's place. The dustbunnies are true to their form for rabbits..... they DO multiply..... many colonists of them. Many people think I'm nuts.... too clean, perhaps; but I do have people who've told me it makes perfect sense to do so........... so I'm not obsessive compulsive, just thorough. It's clean gene I was born with, so it's mostly genetic. My Mother and Grandmother were the same way.

When one proceeds to empty a room, it can be amazing to see the pile it creates in another area. In my case, the kitchen ended up in the livingroom, and has finally been put back into place this week. The floor is down, and most of the work is finished. A few more brushes of paint to the doors, and trim pieces tapped in..... and voila! The kitchen will be done. I am in love with it already, and only too happy to be rid of the 70's look. But the best part...... I unloaded 5 boxes of stupid and unnecessary items I didn't even know I had. How does one collect so much? How did I become like my Mother????? (Oh, and Karl...... if you read this, I didn't get rid of anything that belonged to Mom.) I did purge though, and got everything else back into the kitchen without it looking so filled. It's still a little busy looking, but that's because I haven't painted the cabinet doors to put them back up. I know I'll be on it soon though.

My bedroom was pushed to one side each time I approached a wall to paint. Pictures had to come down, along with my many other foolish stuff on the walls. I actually slept partway into my closet for a while. Gets you a little disorientated when you first wake up, but you get used to it after a week. Luckily my room is not so big..... I've seen closets bigger..... so the task of painting didn't take long considering I was working full time (and more) throughout the projects.

There were many days when I was tied to the business phone till 7pm, after starting at 6 am, so I had no desire to do anything but put myself to bed. With a wedding for 175 to organize, and a birthday party for 75 (that turned into 200), I had my hands full with catering. Never mind the regular luncheon customers that called at 5pm for the next days lunch. I blame myself for that little faux pas, as I've trained the people to call orders in at the last minute just by always accepting them. Since we are not fast food, we do need a little notice in order to line up deliverers..... and a few days notice is always appreciated.

And then I did a silly thing....... I would like to report that I was hammering away when SMASH, the hammer landed on my finger. But no, I have to admit, I was downed a bit by a hangnail. Stupid me for such bad habits! My little injury caught a nice infection. Stupid infection! I ended up on some kind of superbug killer meds, as the doctor wanted to treat the infection from the inside out. Since I've read about the over-medication of penicillin, I questioned the decision, but was assured it was what I had to do. The first one made me a little queasy.... no, a lot queasy..... but I continue taking them. The finger is tender, but healing nicely, so I really can't say: stupid meds...... but I felt that way the first day.

I am relieved to have accomplished so much in a month, and happy with the results. Even though I have a lot more to go, I consider this the downhill part of my journey in reconstruction projects for the year. And the best part of my journey so far? I lost 25 pounds in the process. Woohoo for great results!

As for blogging.... it really had to take a back seat to everything else. Priorities are hard to pick and choose sometimes, depending if you are listening to the angel and devil on your shoulders. In many cases, I swat them both away, and take charge without the guilt of thinking: am I forgetting, hurting, shunning someone without intent. Am I so focused on my task, that I appear to be stuck-up and uncaring? Well, in the case of everything BUT blogging, no. At one point I did leave a nice long comment to everyone from my last post..... but blogger ate it. (I swear. And aren't you glad I didn't blame it on the dog?) All I could leave was a blanket explanation weeks later.... with the hope that I would make it over to some of my favorite links...... plus to that nice Carmi who stopped by to say hello for the first time.

Since my upbringing included training in the magic words: thank you, I have much catching up to do to thank all who have e-mailed or called me during my absence. I finally had some help getting google blogger right, and now I can post again. I only hope you will continue to stop by and say hello whenever you're by the garden. My absences are because my life is very full at times, but I would feel a bigger void to lose my blog friends.

2007-03-02T15:50:00.000-05:00

whitewashing the 1970's........

Putting up the "pardon our appearance" sign in my kitchen due to the recent wave of overwhelming "wanting to get it done", is not an uncommon thing for me to do. I find myself coming up with home improvement ideas, and then wanting to wave my magic wand to see it happen immediately. But like the little red hen who seeks help in the barnyard, I am left alone to deal with the task. Besides, my boys cannot see my visions well when I talk to them about color or texture. I tell them to wait patiently and have faith, for not only will this take some time, but it's only important that I see the vision. For them, it will come at the reveal stage. Still, I did allow a 3-way vote that had to be unanimous as far as color was concerned. That alone took 3 weeks before I picked a color everybody could agree on. I'll be very lucky if the project takes only 3 weeks, but so far, I'm at week one, and only have 3 cabinets primed. Let's face it, brown is not an easy color to cover.

You see, I was left with brown cabinets upon the sale of the house to me 14 years ago. In that time, I have always envisioned them to be white.... clear, clean, crisp white. Something that brought them out of the 1970's and into the new millenium.... something that didn't scream "DATED". In the past 14 years, my house has undergone numerous changes. What was once a diamond in the rough, has slowly become a little gem of a cottage..... all this taking many weekends to complete, tons of paint, and loads of sweat equity.

The picture with this post is not my kitchen, but imagine my surprise when I found it on the web. It's almost the spitting image of mine...... dark, cavelike, and forboding. I've hated it from the day I moved in, but since it was still functional, I gave it a good cleaning, painted the walls white, replaced the nasty brown/ 70's appliances a few years back, and sat back on my laurels that I did the best I could with it, as other areas of the house need more attention. Now I'm eager to forge ahead and make this area a showcase..... one it should have been years ago.

And that's what I've been doing for the past week or so. Brown laminate does not cover well..... 3 coats of primer down, and I'm still plugging away with trying to get it covered. Remodeling a kitchen means that eating in said kitchen is an impossibility. Never mind that the dishes from the cupboards are splayed in every other inch of space in my house (how did I accumulate so much anyway?????..... and how did it all fit in those small cupboards?????) , but the ability to put together any dinner is improbable. Lucky for KFC right down the street, huh?

Being a neat and orderly person, I shouldn't be too shocked or surprised that I got it all to fit .... but it makes me wonder why did I collect so much. Searching my geneology (actually my Mom only), I realized I was very much like her. She had so many dish sets (all pieces included), that when she passed away, we all inherited one, if not several sets. Mine was a colorful Italian chicken set.... an antique I still collect today at yard sales and antique stores. The pieces aren't easy to find, but I still love the set, and have done well in my searches, usually when I'm not thinking about actually looking for it. I am convinced I have that collector gene firmly implanted in my DNA..... along with the bargain one, and the multitasking one. Let's face it, they know no bounds.

So if I am not here as much as I'd like, imagine me with a paint brush in my hands, endlessly covering the 1970's kitchen I was left with. This is going to take some time, as I can never be happy with just getting one thing done. After I successfully paint the cabinets, the walls come next.... then the old wallpaper that is impossible to strip down (covering it with bead board is a better idea), then the floors (hardwood replacing the very old, very dated, very used up vinyl), and then a retrim of shoemolding. Thank goodness I've had practice in this area, and thank goodness hubby is an ex-carpenter. We just might get it all completed before April, if we're lucky...... and then it's on to my office remodel if I have any funds left.

But before all that, I must attend to parties, wedding receptions, and office luncheons that are scheduled for food and services. As a matter of fact, I'm running out the door in a few minutes for a 50th birthday party not too far from my home. Let's see.... I'll be working a 7 hour shift on that, get some rest, and be back at it with the paint brush first thing in the morning. Who says my life isn't full of color?

2007-02-19T11:15:00.000-05:00

if......

you can start the day without caffeine;

you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains;

you can resist complaining to and boring people with your troubles;

you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time;

you can overlook it when those you love take it out on you when, through no fault of your own, something goes wrong;

you can take criticism and blame without resentment;

you can ignore a friend's limited education and never correct him or her;

you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor one;

you can face the world without lies and deceit;

you can relax without liquor;

you can honestly say that deep in your heart you have no prejudice;

Then you have almost reached the same level of development as your cat or dog.

2007-02-18T10:47:00.001-05:00

the inevitable change of life......

Back in my younger and more carefree days (which would be 213 years ago, according to my profile age.... that won't allow for changes), my Mother had "the talk" with me about the change of life that I would soon be experiencing. "It's all part of being a woman", she explained, "The natural process we go through." Not being any smarter than a squirrel, I listened intently, and watched as my Mother dodged most of the bullet on this subject by bringing me to a girl scout meeting that had a movie all about "it". Of course I was full of questions.... and not sure my Mother was prepared for the onslaught of my curiosity. She handled it well, I must admit, and told me to be patient, the change was coming.... it was inevitable just because I was a female. So I was never surprised, and actually rather proud that I became a "woman" at the age of 13..... still as dumb as a squirrel, but with a different set of instructions to go forth with. It was hard to put down the dolls and toys of my youth, but then the discovery of boys was a nice distraction.

Here I am 36 years later, and my Mom isn't around to walk me through the ending process of this "inevitable change". A new change, as it were. Well, lucky for me, technology has progressed a thousand-fold, and I have the internet to gather information, as well as friends, a wonderful comforting Aunt, and my gynocologist. Still doesn't make up for the absence of Mom, but it's nice to know I'm not all alone wading through the information. And is there EVER a plethora of it. I doubt my Mom would have been so well versed on the subject, and probably would have pointed me to the computer, as she did with the movie during my girl scout days.

It seems that there is 35 symptoms to look for. 35????? Holy moley.... there wasn't that many at the beginning of this journey..... and with my memory faltering by the second (one of the classic symptoms), I had to print out the page, along with the check list. At least I had one revelation.... I could at least excuse the memory lapses with normal behavior for this time in my life, and not early onset dementia....... as that runs pretty heavily in my family, too. The other 34 weren't so promising either, a little scary, but informative nonetheless. However, the more I read through the list (over and over and over.......), the other classic symptom of depression comes up...... flashing, in a warning red blare. I am not depressed, and actually have no reason to be; but reading the list makes me a little depressed, and a little forlorn for my youth. That just can't be helped, I guess.

For some reason, one cannot help but want to return to their youth.... it's a human emotion that can bring you back to happier memories if you've led a good life. And I admit, I've had a really good life, and many great memories to reflect back on. The images still run very clear, all the way back to my first ones when I was a wee lass. So it's nice and comforting to know the memory banks are still in working order..... but sad so many years have passed between, and you realize that life happens when you're busy making other plans. John Lennon said it so well, didn't he?

I am fortunate that the rides of my life were enough that I could handle, that being a survivor was more important than chucking the whole experience away. Perhaps it was because I did have good, strict parents who took their job very seriously, and I learned many valuable lessons. Not to say I didn't have a few of my own personal decisions that burned and taught.... but that's all life lessons, along with the instruction booklet you keep about your mental and physical self. Besides, who knows you better than yourself?

So as I pass into the senior moments of my life, not yet 50 and with new instructions within reach, I hope to keep up with my potential of being a survivor, and weathering those symptoms with a pound of grace and humor. Besides, what other choice do I have? Failure is not an option for me. Blame it on the OCD tendencies, blame it on menopause, blame it on the weather..... I didn't come this far to throw it all away. Surviving another change in my life is just a curveball and potential home run if hit just right. Now if I could just quit being such a sissy crybaby at sad news............

2007-02-15T19:02:00.000-05:00

the mayonnaise jar & two cups of coffee........

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the two cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar, shaking the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open spaces between the golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes".

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things..... your family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions. If everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter.... like your job, your house, and your car.

The sand is everything else..... the small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical check-ups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first.... the things that really matter. Set your priorities as the rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

2007-02-14T16:15:00.000-05:00

happy heart day ..........

For some reason, I cannot find the time to get over here everyday. Try as I might, it never fails that the phone will ring, and some project I've started will have to sit by the wayside till I can get to it again..... which could take days, or weeks. How can one be so busy, you ask? Easy when ones list never ends, and get checked off so sporadically as mine. Some how more things get added endlessly, and I'm even willing to admit that I may take a snooze on some of those quieter afternoons. Yes, instead of sticking to the list, I allow it to grow on it's own, knowing that I can manage the real important things in a crunch.... and the rest can wait till I've gotten that second wind.

However.... it is Valentines Day, and I really couldn't let this moment pass without telling everyone who stops by here that you have been a great audience of friends, as well as an inspiration in many ways. I've enjoyed our chats through cyberspace, and am in no way ready to give up reading your posts. I may not be able to comment or write as I'd like to more frequently, but your words stick with me, and your stories, musings, and insights have become a grateful part of my day. You are my cup of tea...... my vacation while at work..... my stolen moments of the day when I don't have to be on call.

A very Happy Heart Day to all........

2007-02-01T15:24:00.000-05:00

lap-quest......

One of the bravest things you can do if you live in the city of Atlanta, is to learn it's navigation..... the endless and quirky twists of road names, neighborhoods, and construction sites are overlapping and confusing. We are a city on the move....... all the time, and getting bigger everyday. My job forces me to rely on a silly little thing called: mapquest. Ha! Take it from me (and a few people I ran across today) that mapquest has it's issues, and none of these amuse me when I am far past the parameters I am used to driving. This especially isn't a good time when you have a morning like Atlanta experienced today.

We were on the bottom end of a weather mass that came through and took all the nice 60 and 70 degree weather away. The northern end of the state did get snow, and we had slush, rain, and cold temperatures. Not a pleasant way to want to start your day, being in traffic in this city.... and certainly not wonderful thoughts crossing my mind about the delivery I have an hour away...... and in an area I am totally unfamiliar with. Silent prayers to my God, and the Gods of Mapquest, I put on my best face at 4:30 AM, and shoved out the door regardless. There are people to be fed! That is the El-quest in me.... one must never disappoint, for you could lose needed funds. Carry on, El-quest!... and lets hope mapquest got it right.

With map in lap, and reading glasses affixed securely in place, I set out on the road heading south of the city. I could have used the option of going straight through the city on 85 south, but decided I'd concede to mapquest's suggestion of taking 285 west, to circumvent going through the heart of the city. One never knows what a nightmare that could be, so going around the city seemed to make sense at 10AM anyway. Getting me to Fayetteville, some 50+ miles away, mapquest came through with shining colors, until I got to the last street. Turning on some backroad highway that was probably farmland not more than 2 years ago, was now filling itself with new businesses, subdivisions, and very poorly marked address numbers. Following the guide from mapquest, I should have only gone 0.1 miles till I see 1260. Bear in mind, mapquest does not tell you what side of the road number 1260 is on.... only that "you will arrive". Ok, I know what you're thinking here.... just find one number and all that side of the street is either odd or even. Easy to do when everyone remembers to post their numbers, which no one did. I stopped to ask directions, and was told: "Yeah, well, mapquest"ll get ya lost, this is where you need to go." It turned out that the last direction should have read 1.5 miles, and "you will arrive". No biggie, I was there in plenty of time, set up, and almost out the door when I turned around an asked for directions back to 85 north. It seemed to me that I could just shortcut back through without having to go around as I did. When I showed the directions to the office girl, she laughed and said, "Mapquest"ll get ya lost, let me show you a better way". Her directions worked like a charm..... and even the sky cleared to a dull overcast for the ride home. Kissing my pansies on the way in the front door for being such brave troopers through our little ice storm, I kicked off my shoes, and breathed a sigh of relief.
Even if the Gods of Mapquest hadn't risen to the occasion completely, at least my God did for getting me home safely.

xo~

2007-01-26T15:10:00.000-05:00

ocd tendencies, part deux.......

Here it is, 2:00 in the afternoon, me still in jammies, and a pile of challenges ahead. It was a slow day at the catering kitchen, so all I had to do was man the office (at home). If I had my druthers, I would say goodbye to the pile of orders that need typing, and laze the afternoon away. It would be a great day for an hour or two snooze, a long luxurious candle lit bath, and some great tunes in the background. No phones, no interruptions whatsoever.

But no. I have tasks to meet, and an OCD monster to feed. I managed to keep the beast under control, as it was pre-occupied with a early phone call (that lasted 3 hours), but by noon, the pussy cat turned into a lion for food. Properly fed, it now roars for order. You see, I can get so sidetracked easily.... especially when there is much to do. But then I run across mornings like this, and think: so what? So what if the laundry doesn't get done for one day? So what if the dishes sit stacked in the dishwasher? So what if I can write my name across the windowsill? So what..... yadda, yadda, yadda........ Don't I deserve a day off? (Well, not completely off, as I still answer the office phone. At least I don't have to get fru-frued up for it.) By the time I finally see the essence of the closing arguments from the angel/devil on my both shoulders, I hedged all that time getting into the afternoon.... still in jammies. I haven't really accomplished anything, and I am one to not be able to end the day with the Chore List not completed. I'm not OCD enough to discount sickness, but laziness is a poor excuse. And this morning, I was laaaaazy. Still in jammies, here.... and it's 2:45. That's lazy. Well, the little devil guy said it was ok, yes? Yes! Of course the angel is beckoning from the other side, and reasoning with me that it's ok to take some time off.... but there are chores to be done. Such a pickle!

I'll have to think about this, and maybe get some things done so I can appease both sides. Thank goodness we no longer have to beat our clothes on rocks to get them clean, at least the washing machine can do the work while I multitask in some other area.

I hope you all have been well, and know I that I miss reading and commenting more on your blogs. If I can get past all that IRS stuff I need to pull together for the CPA (personal and business), I can get back on track. Since I had friends who visited from New Hampshire last weekend, the house is still clean (except for a little dusting and vacuuming), and the gardens were put in, and doing nicely. The business is plodding along, and calls are starting to come in after the small hiatus of Christmas. Peoples diet plans are waning, and meetings are being rescheduled. Hooray for funds!

Oh..... geez.... the monster is calling. Blasted chores! Well, who better than me...... the person loaded with OCD tendencies.

xo~

2007-01-15T16:30:00.000-05:00

a special king......

"The ultimate weakness of violence is that it is a descending spiral, begetting the very thing it seeks to destroy. Instead of diminishing evil, it multiplies it. Through violence you may murder the liar, but you cannot murder the lie, nor establish the truth. Through violence you may murder the hater, but you do not murder the hate. In fact, violence merely increases hate. So it goes. Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that. Hate multiplies hate, violence multiplies violence, and toughness multiplies toughness in a descending spiral of destruction.... the chain reaction of evil. Hate begetting hate, wars producing more wars must be broken, or we shall be plunged into the dark abyss of annihilation."

2007-01-12T23:25:00.000-05:00

joni, no baloney......

Do you ever have one of those days when you wake up with a song in your head? This was mine the other morning:

The Circle Game

Yesterday a child came out to wonder
Caught a dragonfly inside a jar
Fearful when the sky was full of thunder
And tearful at the falling of a star
Then the child moved ten times round the seasons
Skated over ten clear frozen streams
Words like, when you're older, must appease him
And promises of someday make his dreams
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

Sixteen springs and sixteen summer gone now
Cartwheels turn to car wheels thru the town
And they tell him,
Take your time, it won't be long now
Till you drag your feet to slow the circles down
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

So the years spin by and now the boy is twenty
Though his dreams have lost some grandeur coming true
There'll be new dreams, maybe better dreams and plenty
Before the last revolving year is through
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

~~lyrics and music by Joni Mitchell

2007-01-02T18:05:00.000-05:00

rough skies and a beacon in the distance........

To say that the month of December was a busy month would be misleading.... it was far busier than any I've spent in years. Knowing that the events of Christmas would end on the 26th, and I could get back to normal life was all I looked forward to, and is what made me know that the light at the end of the tunnel was not another on-coming train. But I was wrong to a certain degree. Instead of things quieting down to a trickle, I ended up being much busier than expected..... all the while waiting for some real time off to have my foot attended to. You see, I've been hobbling around for the last two months on a bone spur in my right heel.

Hubby has continually reprimanded me to have it checked out.... but I let the customers and their food orders come first....and I let my partners take some time off to be with their families over the holidays. Yes, I took time off to be with my family, but I held off going to the doctor. Only with the insistence of my brother, husband, and aching foot did I finally head over to the closest Kaiser facility today to finally get that long needed x-ray to assess the damage I've done. Not bad for letting it go, my doctor assured me..... with some anti-inflammatory drugs and a whole page of exercises to do with my foot, I should be feeling some relief within the next week or so. No, he would not give me a cortisone shot, as I had originally inquired about, as the bone spur is small, and the diagnosis is actually called "planter fasclitis". So what is this little injury that causes you to feel like someone drove a spike right into your heel? Apparently it is an inflammation of the bottom of the foot between the ball of the foot and the heel. Nice. Try walking on that for two months and wonder where your sunny disposition has disappeared to.

And, yes, December was very busy with parties.... many of which were last minute. These were the type of parties that couldn't be turned down just because my foot throbbed, as they led the guests of these parties into calling me for food to be delivered for New Years. What's another week in the scheme of time I told myself.... why not just wait for after New Years Day? Well..... I wasn't a moment too late in that assessment, as this past weekend culminated the worse pain of all as I tried to get my Christmas ornaments and lights back into their boxes. By the end of Monday, I could barely walk for all the strain, and resting my foot only proved to be of no real help. Apparently, I should be stretching this little inconvenience away.... and only with the exercises that are specific to the problem if I ever want to have happy feet again.

So I apologize to all for my absence here, and the fact that you all came over to say hello, wished me well for the holidays, and then heard no response. I wasn't ignoring you.... I was busy looking for the beacon that would lead me home again. Some quiet time, some getting my life back in order, and some time to finally have a look at the foot which has given me so much trouble these last two months.

Awareness asked me what I wished for Christmas this year, and at the time I decided to answer my response in a post. I never answered her question...... but I intend to now. My greatest wish is for peace on Earth everywhere. To live on a planet that houses an intelligent species such as ourselves, we spend so much of our time cultivating hate, wars, and a host of prejudices that set us against one another all too easily. What a terrible waste we've made of our time here if we can do no better than to think of ways to wipe our species clean of the very planet we inhabit. But I know in my heart that this is one wish that cannot be filled so readily. So....... on I wish and hope.

My Christmas (albeit very belated) wish to all of you who stop by here..... that you see the beauty of life that has been put before you, and the luck you really have but often don't see. It really exists, although not always in ways you'd like it to. Remember, being rich is also a state of mind, not just a bank account. If you have friends and family members that care about you, they will be your wealth for life, and make you more rich than you could imagine.

Happy New Years to all.... and may this be the year of wealth you deserve.

2006-12-14T20:45:00.000-05:00

derailed.......

Somewhere along the line life moves along at a palpitable pace.... one which, if we are lucky, we can keep things in perspective, as well as keep up with the necessary day to day chores we alien for ourselves. Being organized, making lists, and skipping through all we set out before us makes us feel accomplished at the end of the day. We did what we set out to do, and we can now give ourselves a great big pat on the back for being so together.

Well, not me lately. It doesn't matter how many lists I make, or how well I follow them. The days are too short, and the lists are too long. I've been derailed. I am struggling to keep up with the many requests asked from me on a daily basis, and I find that I get further behind no matter how many hours I work.... currently the hours add up to 12 hours for my job, and an additional 4 or 5 for personal. I actually did have an afternoon off a few days ago, and I crashed. Lists be damned, I needed some real sleep. With the phone nestled closely to my head, I made a comfortable dent on the couch and traveled to the land of naptime. Without this one moment to myself, I would have surely been a cranky cantankerous witch..... not one of my better sides for the world to see.

So, that all said, I have not abandoned this blog. I am stealing away moments here and there to keep caught up reading.... although even that has not worked too well lately. Since I finally have a few minutes before I finally retire for the night (for the morning hour of 4:30 AM looms close), I wanted to explain to all that the many Christmas parties that I cater have to take precedence for the moment..... after all, they pay the bills. When the busyness of the season ends Christmas Eve, I will fix the derailing track in my life, and continue on. Perhaps the muses will also be kind enough to return..... after all, they did get a taste of the cranky witch, and hid for the season.

Hoping you all are ready for the BIG DAY..... after all, it's only 11 days away! Wherever did the month go?

2006-11-30T14:39:00.000-05:00

decking the halls......

With Thanksgiving safely tucked away for another year, it's time to concentrate on the holiday madness of Christmas. Even though we are aware that it comes the same time and same day EVERY year... it always feels like we are never ready for it to have come so fast. Didn't we put away the ornaments and lights just last week? How did a whole year zing through in that short amount of time? How was it that I wasn't paying attention?

My tradition is to put up the tree and lights on the first weekend of December....... unlike the neighbors who like to start their lawn decor the Friday after Thanksgiving. Eager beavers, to be sure. Well, who can blame them if they have the time and manpower.... besides, the neighborhood association awards a whopping gift card (worth $25.00) to the coolest display of the neighborhood. I've never won.... and am convinced it's rigged. Anyhoo....... back to the point. I don't adorn my yard with the lighted reindeers or blow-up Santas. Strings of white icicle lights drape from the facia of my house, a nice wreath hangs on the door, and we put a few colored lights on the bushes in front of the house. All very simple, and all within taste, as I abhor anything real flashy for me. However, I do like to see it at other houses.... and sometimes the flashier the better. I must admit that viewing these displays during the day make them come off silly and too contrived..... but in the stillness of the night, driving by, they give off a magical vision.

I've had the opportunity to drive through some of the classier neighborhoods in Atlanta..... you know, the ones where the houses are dressed to the nines with perfectly hung lights, and wreathes on every window. The occupants of the address never do the work themselves, as they always hire out for this position. Of course the effect is spectacular. Then there are the littler neighborhoods like my own, where it is quite obvious we take on the responsibility ourselves. We only have one Clark Griswold in the group.... a man who takes decorating for the holidays far beyond traditional. I would like to see his electric bill at the end of the month, as I'm sure the dials never stop turning and have an accelerated pace to them, especially at Christmas. This particular gentleman dresses up his house for ALL the holidays.... yup, even Valentines Day. The display is complete with holograms, statuettes, blinking lights, and signs. It appears a little over the top, but keeps us amused all the same. I'm only too grateful he lives far down the street from my house... and better yet, not across the street from me. The light show would be deafening.

Every year I find myself in search of the perfect victorian tree. It must be thin, not too tall, and be able to fit into a small area I have reserved for it in my livingroom.... AFTER I move furniture and houseplants to arrange for the spot. Lucky for me, I can spot my Charlie Brown tree within the first few minutes of trolling the rows upon rows of cut trees. And every year, I vow to scale down a bit, perhaps get an even smaller tree, but once the ornaments and lights are out of their boxes, I can't help but get into the spirit of setting up decorations everywhere. (I usually reprimand myself when it's time to take it all down... but don't we all?) I did run across some really nice table-top trees at a local nursery this year, and am still tempted, but I do adore a tree that goes from floor to ceiling, and would still miss not being able to put up ornaments my son and I have collected over the years.....well, mostly me. We did the little traditional thing of hunting down the perfect "new" ornament for many years when he was a child.... at 20, it's no longer a priority for him. However, we did good over the years, as each one has a story of it's own for being chosen. Doesn't everybody have ornaments like that?

So the first weekend in December is already here, and somewhere between juggling twenty Christmas parties and plenty of last minute executive luncheons, I plan to get myself in gear to decorate the house. Since hubby is a ladder-climber, he has the honors of icicle placement on the facia. I plan to be ground supervisor, official tree trimmer, and nativity scene placer, while my son has the honors of setting up the village we add houses and people to each year. By the time we're through, my house has taken on every sense of the word: decorated. The fresh scent of pine permeates the air, Santa and snowmen faces peek out from under the tree limbs to wish all a wonderful season with their smiles.........Christmas red and green is everywhere, and my livingroom takes on an animated look. Many times I get up in the middle of the night to just stare at the lights, in the silence of my home. It is a peaceful and magical time..... a time to reflect, and a time to have a few moments with a cup of tea and my God.

2006-11-22T10:05:00.000-05:00

holiday feasting and giving thanks........

Tomorrow will be a day for most of us to gather with family or friends.... to get on with the process of turkey carving, and giving thanks that all who made it to the table will be richly rewarded with that favorite part of the big bird we place in front of us. We will then loosen the top buttons of our pants as we settle in to watch the parade or football games that will be playing continuously on TV for hours. As we root for our favorite team to win, or best float of the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade.... we will know that snoozing is part of the process, indeed it is expected.

The trip back to our respective abodes will be sent with many well wishes of a safe travel on sketchy road conditions for some.... all the while knowing that the care package sent with us will provide snacks for a midnight raid on our refrigerators later. Another holiday looms it's presence one short month later, and we force ourselves to get up in the wee hours Friday morning to stand guard at the local Walmart to snatch that coveted gift..... to perfect in price to not sacrifice some sleep over.

Not me. For the last twelve years, I have passed over the Thanksgiving holiday. I have sent off hubby and son to relatives to enjoy, while I turned up the Christmas carols on the radio, and took out the baking pans to make cookies and breads. I chose to be alone. It wasn't that I was not thankful for all I had, or all I had accomplished... rather it was a day I could reflect on all I had learned from a master. It was my homage to my Mom, who passed away on Thanksgiving in 1978. I get a little weepy still on Thanksgiving... and given my nature of not losing all control in front of people, I like to weep alone as well. I don't do puffy face well in front of people.

This year will be a little different though, as I plan to make the trip up to Sylvania, Alabama, where my sister-in-law has the honors of making the feast for the whole family. Being in their company, and joining in with their wit and laughter is the best medicine, I have found. The banter is friendly, the company a blessing in itself, and the food (traditionally) a whole family participation event. No one person does everything.... we all contribute with our favorite dishes that wouldn't make it Thanksgiving without. There are no embarrassing moments, no fights, no awkward moments. Only laughter rings from the table... except in the moments when everybody is stuffing their mouths with more delectable goodies. I won't have time to think about anything other than I have made the right decision to come along this time. I can save the weepy moments for later.... like I will the cookies and breads. All things will get done in due time.... and I will have another wonderful memory of the good people in my life to tuck away.

To all who celebrate.... to all who struggle with the turkey to get it carved just right... and to all who overstuff themselves.......... have a wonderful and safe holiday.

Happy Thanksgiving!

2006-11-20T14:30:00.000-05:00

38 years later, we still need to hear these words.....

"Too much and too long, we seem to have surrendered community excellence and community values in the mere accumulation of material things. Our gross national product.... if we should judge America by that-- counts air pollution and cigarette advertising, and ambulances to clear our highways of carnage. It counts special locks for our doors, and the jails for those who break them. It counts the destruction of our redwoods and the loss of our national wonder in chaotic sprawl. It counts napalm and the cost of a nuclear warhead, and armored cars for police who fight riots in our streets. It counts Whitman's rifles and Speck's knife, and the television programs which glorify violence in order to sell toys to our children.

Yet the gross national product does not allow for the health of our children, the quality of their education, or the joy of their play. It does not include the beauty of our poetry or the strength of our marriages; the intelligence of our public debate or the integrity of our public officials. It measures neither our wit nor our courage; neither our wisdom nor our learning; neither our compassion nor our devotion to our country; it measures everything, in short, except that which makes life worthwhile. And it tells us everything about America except why we are proud that we are Americans."

Bobby Kennedy, speech at the University of Kansas, March 18, 1968

2006-11-16T14:15:00.000-05:00

comfortably numb.......

Before I get around to my links and say hello to all my favorite reads, I must send an apology for my absence. To say my life has become busy is an understatement... I am far above that assessment. This year I was ready as far as my shoe choices.... but the brain and body are having a hard time with it, and December parties are still in store.

Catering has been very, very good this season... and we have been cooking, hopping, and running in all directions of the metro area. Figure you put a pin in the middle of a map of Atlanta, then count out 100 miles in radius.... and I've been there within the last three weeks. If not, I would have missed all the beautiful foliage we had this year.... as it was the only way I was able to witness the colors of Autumn. And we did have a brilliant year this time. I almost thought I had driven so far that I was back in New England again.

Problem is, I wasn't able to keep up with anything else.... and the leaves in my yard give proof that the house and gardens look abandoned. If it wasn't for the vehicle parked in my driveway, it almost appears that I might have gone on vacation. Not so..... although I'm overdue for a few days around Thanksgiving. This is the "me" time I take every year; if not, Christmas would not exist in our household. There is much baking to be done, and presents to wrap and mail. Hubby wanted to take a few days to go out to Savannah.... but I had to turn the offer down. Geez.... and I really could use a few minutes, hours, and days at the beach. Oh well...... it's chocolate chip banana bread season, and many loaves have to be rotated through the oven. Besides, this is my only time to make the roll, cut, and decorate sugar cookies. I turn on Christmas carols played by a local station and patiently wait to hear "Oh Holy Night" .......as that's my favorite song of all. The baking and music have a way of putting me in the mood.

In the meantime, I have another wedding reception to prepare for this coming Sunday night, and some pre-Thanksgiving holiday dinners to make and deliver through the coming week. I look forward to this time of year because of the smells of turkeys cooking in our ovens, but am well over it by the 10th turkey to trim. Today I hit my mark, as we fed 300 folks glazed ham and sliced turkey. I always forget how slippery those big birds are..... and I nibble too much in the process of carving. How can one not? Problem is, I am a little sick of turkey after the first batch of the season..... the reason I insist we have something completely different for Christmas. I'm turkeyed out by that point.

Somewhere in all the free time I will have left (cough cough), I still need to attack the yard, and clean the house. But first.... I want to take some free time today to go around to each and everyone to say hi.... and so sorry for being awol. The good thing about priorities is that they can be comfortably shifted...... or maybe I'm just comfortably numb.

Have a wonderful weekend, y'all!

2006-11-07T16:00:00.000-05:00

a great opportunity........

One of the most important liberties we share as American citizens is our voting voice. This is a chance for us to be heard as a "collective of people".... a chance for us to enact change within our own government if we choose fit. It's a privilege that a great deal of other countries do not share.....take most of Africa, for instance. And North Korea. So this should be a great lesson to us as citizens to preserve our voting rights by actually using them. How else will we be able to change what we see as wrong. Well, in a perfect world...... this system is perfection personified.

Our challenge is that we do not live in a perfect world. Our globe gets smaller by the minute, and the problems of the world get closer in proximity at each spin of the orb. Not only do we try to solve the problems in our own personal lives, we find ourselves embroiled in the problems of the planet as a whole. So lets hope each American citizen exercises their right, privilege and duty today. Vote, knowing the issues your candidate stands behind... making a difference for change where change is needed. And vote, knowing this system is still the best in the world... because it sure as hell is a lot better here than it is in a many other countries that never get to voice opinions about their government.

2006-10-31T14:30:00.000-05:00

a ghost story.....

A long time ago when I was still a teenager, I took a job of babysitting houses for people who had business out of town. Since we lived in a little cow pasture of a town anyway, everybody knew everybody else... and their cousin, and their cousin's cousin. Well, you get the picture. One house in particular was a pass-down job to me from a friend who used to sit there on occasion. Many times she would call me up and ask me to stay over with her, as it frightened her to stay alone. I guess I couldn't blame her, as the house was actually named: The Grey Ghost Manor. I was too young (only 19) to really think there was anything behind it... only a name of an older home set back on a country road. That is until one time when I stayed there alone.

Upon returning to the house at dusk, after work and grocery shopping a few items for dinner, I parked in the detached garage of the house and started to walk up the short path to the back door. Looking up to the second floor I noticed a light on in the window of a corner room. Strange, I thought, I didn't even go into that room. How could a light be on? Was somebody in the house? Since there were no other cars around, I deduced that I was alone. Or maybe I was just naive enough not to think it all through before I entered the house. No ghost met me at the door, or on the stairs leading up to the second floor. I made my way around to the corner bedroom, saw the light, and shut it off. Whatever turned it on was a mystery to me, and to this day, remains a mystery. But it all didn't end there. I would find things misplaced or moved, and always had a shiver up the back of my spine whenever I traveled into the livingroom. The kitchen stayed warm and friendly, but the livingroom was a complete contrast. There were creaky noises, but my rational mind told me that the house was settling... a lot! After all, it was built in the 1800's.

My last night there gave me the biggest scare of all. I never did actually see a ghost, but I felt it's presence around me somehow. It's not anything I can explain fully, but the goosebumps on my arms convinced me that I could no longer stay here. Perhaps the house missed it's owners and was trying to find a way for me to leave and never come back? I would find out later that my friend had the same experience as well. She would never return, and I told the owners I couldn't either. We never saw anything.... we only felt it, whatever IT was. I'm sure the owners thought us to be silly girls who scared too easily. Regardless, I find it difficult to feel comfortable in a home when I know there are ghosts involved, even if it is in name only.

My brother Karl had a house in Massachusetts that was rumored to have ghosts as well. I didn't know this at the time of accepting his invitation to stay overnight years later when my son was still young. My brother Eric told me about it on the trip up to Karl's, and for the rest of the evening I was too nervous to sleep. Cuddled up with my son on the couch in the livingroom, I left the TV on for noise, glancing up at the stairs that led to the second floor.... looking for any sighting of a ghost coming down. I never did see one, thankfully.

If I want to see a ghost, I'll be patient enough to wait for Halloween to be properly frightened by the kids in the neighborhood and their costumes. Thank goodness for the big bags of candy I purchased, as I'll get quite a few customers tonight.

Happy Halloween!

2006-10-27T17:10:00.000-04:00

a long nap for sunday....

As this weekend comes to a close, so will I. Plans have been fit into the schedule to include a nice nap for Sunday, as Saturday will be filled with a big birthday party bash for Poppa.... hubby's Dad. He turns 80 in a few days, and the family cannot get away with the customary cake and candles. 80 is a big number.... and only your imagination can wonder what this man has seen during that time.

He was born in the city of Atlanta, and saw it grow over the years. At the time of the premier of Gone With The Wind, in 1939, Poppa had pretty much a front row seat to the gala the city threw for the stars of the movie. Poppa was also around to witness the Winecoff Hotel fire in 1946, that took 119 lives. It was the worst hotel fire of it's time. He actually witnessed people leaping to their death, as the hotel was not up to fire code standards, and did not display any fire escapes for people to flee on. When you witness something like that, I'm sure it stays with you for a lifetime.

Poppa worked as a bread man all his life, and it wasn't unknown for him to bring home bags of bear claws, ho-ho's, cinnamon rolls, loaves of bread, and other delectable goodies for the family to enjoy. In the late 1970's, Poppa transferred to Ft. Payne, Alabama, and took an administrative position with Earth Grains Bakery. Since they had a nice plant, and he was once again surrounded by country, it appealed to him. By this time, hubby had already graduated from High School, and decided to stay in Atlanta instead. He loved Atlanta... it was his home, and always has been, and didn't see the need to move up there. Besides, hubby is to "citified" for that much country living.

Poppa finally retired from the field some years back. It was time for him to do some traveling, and he took full advantage of the US map to explore areas he and my Mother-in-law weren't able to do when they had young children (five to be exact). Trips to Alaska, New England, the Grand Canyon, and many parts unknown were always showing up in our mailbox in the form of a postcard... and I was glad to see they were smart about their money, and not saving it for anyone to fight over long after they were gone. Spend, Go, See!, I would tell them.... you deserve this! You've worked hard all these years, now is the time for you to enjoy. And they did. Of course, I would miss the bags of goodies he used to bring to us, but he still had some clout with the bakery, and was able to land a bag or two whenever we took trips up to Alabama to visit them. The plant is now closed, and the bags have ceased.... much to the happiness of my hips, although not my sweet-tooth.

When we took our little excursion to the Smokies back at the end of August, we took Poppa, my Mother-in-law, and brother and sister-in-law out to dinner in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. After dinner, we walked around to scout the shops (and there are many of them.... they don't call it Myrtle Beach of the mountains for nothing). I walked with Poppa while everyone else paired off. I noticed that he walked a bit slower, more hunched over, but with a will that was a strong as any young man. He kept assuring us that he was keeping up... and no, he wasn't tired at all... but the first chance we came upon a bench, he made good use of it. His wit is still there, as is his knowledge of cars and knives. He can tell a good story, and keep up the the rest of the family when it comes to jibs and jabs at each other in fun. He is a good man, faithful husband, and proud Grandfather to eight grandchildren who adore him. He deserves more than a cake and candles for his 80th year..... he deserves a party worthy of Atlanta's finest caterer.

And Sunday..... well after I successfully get those houseplants off the porch, cleaned and spiffed up for indoors (minus all those pesky spiders that like to hide out in the leaves), I plan to put my already tired feet up and read the paper.... or watch movies.... or nap.... or whatever. My busy season has already started, I'll need every bit of feet-up time I can get.

Have a great weekend everybody... and remember to set your clocks BACK an hour Saturday night.

2006-10-26T13:12:00.000-04:00

i believe......

A dear friend shared this with me. Please read this very slowly... it's a keeper for sure. There are so many truths in it.

I believe that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in awhile and you must forgive them for that.

I believe that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. The same goes for true love.

I believe that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I believe that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I believe that you should always leave loved ones with loving words... it may be the last time you see them.

I believe that you can keep going long after you can't.

I believe that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I believe that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I believe that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I believe that heroes are the people who do what has to be done, when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I believe that money is a lousy way to keep score.

I believe that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I believe that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I believe that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I believe that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I believe that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them, and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I believe that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others, sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I believe that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I believe that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I believe that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other; and just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean that they do.

I believe that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret.... it could change your life forever.

I believe that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I believe that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I believe that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I believe that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I believe that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I believe that you should send this to all the people that you believe in. I just did.
In all things... know that your God is with you.

2006-10-24T19:15:00.000-04:00

a sad state of affairs.....

For the past week I have been looking up the statistics on gun control and anything related to the issues of guns. Needless to say, I would have to live three lifetimes to get all the information out there, nevermind all the changing stats that come up everyday. It is an issue that many talk about, whether they are pro or con, and an issue that sparks loads of emotions for either side of the ballot for gun control. The subject also brings out some of the most diversified arguments for owning a gun I've ever seen.

Topping the list: the 2nd amendment. One cannot even bring up the issue of gun control without someone countering with a debate that it is "the right" of every man to bear arms. Without the 2nd amendment securely in place, our country would immediately resort to a Totalitarian state, and the government would then swoop in and take over the masses.... as did the Nazis against the Jews during the 1930's. Yeah, excuse me while I don't quite fall into that realm of thinking. Given the problems they are having in Washington, I hardly find that likely.... but it is a stand that gun-users use most often. Personally I think our government is doing more damage economically, and can't see their way out of a paper bag with both sides open.... but that's an argument for another day.

More statistics showed that even with programs in place to yank the guns off the streets, or programs in place for exchanges, it still did not reduce the numbers of crime all that much. Criminals were not the ones handing in the guns, as they hardly had any use of the $200.00 voucher from Target (as Massachusetts tried) to do so. Folks who participated in the exchange only went to the nearest Walmart and purchased a newer gun. So that program, although nice in it's efforts, goes unrewarded if someone really wants to carry a gun.

This brought up the issue of criminals being the only persons who would have guns, and how would one defend themselves in an attack? And here I found something very interesting. Polled in a prison (don't ask me which one, as I read so many articles on this, I just can't remember now), prisoners who used a gun to rob, kill, or rape said that they would not have had the kahunas to pull off a stunt IF they didn't have the gun in their hand in the first place. Some did admit that if they didn't have a gun, they could or would have used a knife.... they were just that hell-bent on the crime, but the majority of criminals preferred having a gun in their hand, as it empowered like nothing other.

And that is the whole thing in a nutshell: empowerment. For some reason you stand a better chance of warding off an attack if you had a gun of your own. After all, the playing field has evened up a bit, right? Ah, well, perhaps so.... but I still find that a sad state of affairs.
I am, and will always be anti-gun. I find no practical use for weapons, and find them destructive and counter-productive for a peaceful society. I find it hard for the United States to profess to the world that we are a "peace-loving society", when we have such a fascination with weapons.

Oh sure, I read all the arguments for reasons why we need to be toting guns.... go to wikipedia and they have them listed nicely. It still didn't change my mind.... it only made me sadder to think that the enemy was us.

In writing this post, I am not out to offend anyone who does have a legitimate license as well as education on how to handle and store a weapon. It is your private right to do as you please, after all, you are protected by the 2nd amendment on this issue. I only hope to never meet up with you when you are pissed off at the world in a moment of passion or despair, or in a moment when you are being robbed and I'm caught in the middle of the gunfire.

Too bad we don't live in a time when we could actually give peace a chance.

2006-10-17T19:40:00.000-04:00

welcome baby 300 million.......

At 7:46 AM this morning, the 300 millionth baby was born in the United States, a mere 39 years after the 200 millionth baby was born in 1967. At the statistical rate we are headed in, they estimate that the 400 millionth baby will be born in 2021, or thereabouts.

According to several different news services, baby 300 million was born in Atlanta, at our own Northside Hospital. Woohoo for another first for our lovely city. Of course, New York City is also claiming the honors... so it may be a few days before they can sort it out properly. In the meantime, go forth new baby, have a wonderful life, and remember to do good things.

2006-10-10T17:15:00.000-04:00

time out..........

Time has become a dimension that is unknown in my universe lately. To make any real plans depends on everybody else, what they're doing, and how involved they've made me. This goes especially so for my work, as it has top billing. After all, it pays the bills, so putting off work is something I have to carefully consider when other plans pop up.

This morning started much the same as all the rest... rising at 5:30 AM. With a quick shower, a fast spritz of perfume, and a jump into some comfortable jeans, I was out the door and on the road to my kitchen 30 minutes away to prep for six caterings, all to be delivered before noon. Noticing that my gas tank was reading a little below half a tank, I decided to play it smart and stop to fill up. No sense running out of gas on Atlantas finest highways, right? Not having my trusty glasses on to read at the pump, I mistakenly pushed the button for a car wash to be included. No problem, as my windshield resembled the bathroom of the many birds that occupy the trees above my driveway. It would be nice to drive without the splotches that dotted my view.

I arrived at my kitchen, and immediately hit the ground running. Making sure that each separate bin for the customers were filled with the necessary components for their individual caterings, I went on to the next task of grilling chicken for a baked potato and salad bar we offer as part of our menu selections. It is usually at this point that I multi-task and scrub up the pots, pans, and many utensils we use throughout the morning. Since it is right next to the stove, I am in the best position to muddle through this, all the while keeping my eye on the chicken so that it won't burn. Feeling relieved that I finished it all so quickly, I breathed a sigh of relief. What could possibly go wrong, as I was ahead of schedule. Leaving with three of the deliveries by 10:15, I had more than enough time to get to the first one... and decided that a stop to the post office would allow me to drag my feet a bit. No sense in delivering hot food too early, as it will cool down too quickly. Besides, the post office was on the way, and it would be nice to see a few checks in the mail. That would be my second and most fatal mistake of the morning.

Returning to my car to start over to the clients office, the key would not turn over the engine. Repeated attempts only allowed for a "click, click, click" sound... not to mention a few choice words uttered from my mouth. This is my utter nightmare when delivering, and it's not the first time I've had this experience. Usually, I am lucky enough to be over and done with delivering before car mishaps happen, but today wasn't my lucky day in that area. "THINK!", I kept repeating to myself, "THINK!" What were my options? With one partner an hour and a half away south to me on two other deliveries, and another partner thirty minutes west of me on another delivery, I knew calling them was futile. Oh yeah, that's right! Chris is home....what did he say before I left this morning.... that's right, no school today. So with a quick call to him to get over to me immediately, an even quicker transfer of food bins, I was behind, but not by too much. Since the post office is located close to my home, I dropped him off and proceeded onto the first delivery. I called all of my clients to let them know of the circumstances, and each were pleasant and understanding..... after all, this was beyond my control, but I had a handle on it if they didn't mind me being a few minutes late. No problemo.... or so I thought.

The first delivery held me up for ten minutes, while they decided where they were going to put the food, the second delivery (20 minutes in another direction) was at a hospital that had little to no adequate parking for delivery vehicles. A few more choice words came out of my mouth (windows rolled up, of course), and I finally arrived to the third delivery (another 20 minutes in another direction) ten minutes late. The gentleman who had originally ordered the food through his secretary (who I had called 45 minutes earlier to let her know of my car troubles) was fuming. When I had explained what had happened, he wanted no part of it. "Just get the food in there!", was his response. I quickly set it up, and headed out the door, handing the secretary her receipt. She took a look at it, and asked if we were going to take anything off "for being late". Scenes played in my head when I remembered the last delivery I had at this particular client, where they made me wait fifteen minutes to set up a catering they had ordered, and I did arrive on time. Since I do a good deal of business with her, and not wanting to lose them as clients, I told her I would get back to the office to see what I could do. I'm almost too glad she didn't follow me to my car, as I was not a happy camper at this point. To think I had risked life, limb, and radar to speed over there..... only to be a total of ten minutes late.

Calling one of my partners, I explained the situation. Now began his tirade of choice words. Being that he is of kind nature, he volunteered to come out to where my car sat dead to take a look at the battery. After all, that seemed like the most logical place to start. If it was just the battery, he could remove it, and plop in a new one.... and, Auto Zone was right across the street, how convenient was that? As it turns out, the battery was worn out, he is very handy, and I was on my way again by 2:00. I picked my son back up, we went back to get my vehicle, and returned home by 2:15. My first order of business was to attack some of the charges against the last delivery's invoice. By this time, I had significantly cooled down, and was generous in taking $75.00 off.

One of the most important things that hubby has done for all of our cars is supply us with tool boxes, and in my case (as I have a problem in this area) jumper cables. I can't think of how many times I have been stranded on the road with one car trouble after another, and hubby wanted to be sure I was armed with enough tools to take care of simple fixes. Yes, I do know how to use them, and have had to plenty of times. When I was stuck at the post office, a kindly older gentleman asked me this very question, and I assured him that I was well rounded in jumping a car. He laughed, and said that he also had a "problem" in that area. He offered to give me a jump from his vehicle, but the charge wouldn't take. He then offered to take me where I needed to go, but I declined as I explained I was a caterer on three missions, and there was no way I could occupy all that time from him. Besides, Chris was home, and I was fortunate that home was only two minutes away from where I was stranded. He looked relieved, even if I looked harried, and I'm sure he said a silent prayer to St. Christopher in my honor. After all, I was still careful in my driving (not like a madman, mind you) but still driving beyond the posted speed limits. I feel quite sure he asked St. Christopher to make sure I arrived safely, and best yet.... no speed traps.

Now that I am home, and it's three hours later, I have no plans to go out any further. Work piled up in the office that needs attending, and I need a little more cool down time on the couch. After all, my choice words earlier, earned me a "time out" of sorts. If I were much younger, my mother would have considered washing my mouth out with soap.

2006-10-03T17:50:00.000-04:00

a new level of terrorism......

There really used to be a time when we could rely on living in a Pollyanna existence.....the world was relatively safe in our part of the playground. Parents could let their children roam the neighborhood.... in fact, it was encouraged. Since Mom was home all day with you, it wasn't below her to use any ploy to get you out of the house, and out of her hair. We still had strict instructions to stay within earshot, lest we be late for dinner, but the freedom of being outside meant playing baseball games till dusk, long games of hide and seek, or fort building. Well..... at least that's the way I remember my childhood. I don't see any of that anymore.

When I was a young mother, I feared for the safety of my child, just as any parent does. The only time I felt really safe with him being out of my sight was when he attended school. It was a safe-zone..... completely off limits to drugs, knives, guns, and any other perverted means to harm innocent people. Just as my son was springboarding into High School from 8th grade, Columbine happened. I sat watching TV and cried. It seemed so senseless..... so wrong, and I couldn't understand how the people who branished guns and randomly shot scared fleeing victims could feel any sense of good out of this. What did it actually accomplish? We may never really know, as the profiles for these deranged people change daily, and the statistics for this type of violence rises.

There was a time when school shootings were as unlikely as lightening strikes..... the statistics were millions/ billions to one that anything like this was ever going to happen in your neighborhood. I can bet the gentle Amish folk had better odds than that. Sadly, we have entered a new level of terrorism by our own people. In the past week alone, three more senseless school shootings have been added to the list, and our collective hearts have been saddened further. We mourn for the families, and pray they find some semblance of normalcy to carry on with; and we hope that the people who carry out these hideous tasks find the proper help they need before they barricade themselves in with weapons to take out innocent lives with.

For all the families who have been effected by this mindless carnage, you have my deepest sympathies. May your God find a way to console you through one of the darkest moments of your life.

2006-10-02T19:10:00.000-04:00

two of the three "r"s.......

One writes because one has much to say. One reads because they have much to learn... saving all their writing for commenting opinions or using the prose as a muse to springboard into a story of their own. Lately, my muses have been a bit dried up. Not that there isn't enough topics to write about, but rather I lack cohesiveness that comes with putting out a good paragraph. Questions come into play whether the topic is good, rambling, or enough to draw in a captive audience, and many days I fall very short of a good mark to get a post off the ground. Many days, I really do get busier than I had expected, too.

I find myself traveling around to everything I can read, the blogs, the web, even the newspaper for stories that spark a passion to put out an opinion, but all to no avail as I slip under the waves of procrastination. Tomorrow morning, I tell myself... tomorrow will be the magic day when writing will come as natural to me as breathing. But sadly, tomorrow is another day for me to procrastinate further. I have to pardon myself for the apathy I display, and try to get on with the business of work.... after all, I still have to pay my way through this time, regardless if I put word to page or not.

So, once again, I apologize for falling very far behind with all the friends I have made through this medium. You have all kept up very well, had lively stories, and put forth a wonderful effort to keep me, as well as your regular readers, amused and informed. You have allowed me to think beyond my little corner of the world, while expanding my opinions. Bravo to you..... after all, I am usually set in my ways on certain things, but have managed to see a different side of possibilities I may never have thought of.

Regardless of whether I comment back, I always manage to catch up on the reading end of blogging. To leave a comment three posts back is further embarrassment that I am not on the ball as I'd like..... but some days, I really need to walk away from the computer and take care of the real world I live in. As it stands now, I am more than one month behind in shipping out a birthday present that should have arrived to the recipient by September 2nd. Thankfully, she is a forgiving friend. Yet I find myself devastated by my lack of being on top of things. That just isn't me, and never has been. I'm not sure if age has anything to do with it, but I'm not going to make any excuses for being lazy.... because it's all my own fault. Yeah, somedays are busier than others, and 24 hours can travel faster than a speeding bullet when the plate is loaded with too many tasks. I guess it's all in the category of time management.... which I seem to lack lately.

I pulled off the web altogether this past weekend, neither reading or writing, because I was deperate to have some time off to tend to the yardwork and house repairs. It seems that my house is systematically breaking down a little here and a little there. Is it no wonder they call this purchase the "money pit"? Nothing major had to be done, but a lot of little things needed tending to..... after which hubby declared that we were taking Sunday off to go to the Botanical Gardens in downtown Atlanta. Since it had been years that I've walked around the beautiful gardens, and many more exhibits had opened up, I couldn't refuse his request.... and we got extremely lucky on our choice of days. Not only were we able to see the special exhibit of mosaic statuary on loan throughout the gardens and greenhouses, but they had a trail through the forest with the most artistic scarecrows on display. Two special exhibits for the price of one! Woohoo.... a great way to make your money stretch while enjoying a free day off from the regular world. Since the day was sunny and breezy, we spent a good deal of time there, and I have to admit our lazy day wasn't wasted. And, oh my, I didn't care if the phone was ringing in the office, I needed a day to be off altogether, then waited on for lunch. I guess entitlement is a by-product of procrastination and laziness sometimes, because it sure worked well on Sunday.

But here we are.... back to the regular work week, or as hubby refers to it: back to the big house (his definition of "work"). I feel accomplished to a small extent, as many house repairs were tended to, the yard was mowed, and flowers watered..... but I still have a list to check off for things that will take more time than I allowed for them this weekend. Oh well.... there is always a tomorrow.

In the meantime, I will wonder around my links to check in on everybody.... and hope that blogger is kind enough to quite swallowing the comments I do leave. I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend, and a great week in store ahead. How can you not when the weather has cooled down, and the leaves are slowly starting to turn their shades of red and gold? This is an amazing time of year.....

2006-09-24T20:00:00.000-04:00

neighbor dogs......

Just past the boundaries of my flower gardens, in my backyard, is a fence that separates my neighbor (and a whole neighborhood) from mine. Since my yard is so dense with trees, I can barely see past the fence, except for a small part that runs the length of the back flower garden... at the bottom; where I can see into the neighbors bottom part of their back yard. I've always joked that I could walk stark naked past my bedroom window with no fear of anyone looking in, as the trees offer total foliage cover.... well, except for that small patch at the bottom of the fence. This is not a regular solid fence.... more like posts with board runners. At one time someone hammered up chicken wire as further retention, as they had dogs to keep kenneled. I've never changed it in the 14 years I've lived here, and never felt the need. Sure, a nice privacy fence would look good... but I've never been in the mood to jump back there and do it. Besides, the old fence has a weathered quality to it, and I've added artwork for color and texture. Each post holds a sun face with cupped hands... and the many branches that I have pruned hold many birdhouses I've collected over the years. It's totally girlie... but that's kind of the look I was going for. No I don't have any of those silly bending over old people.... or those pin wheels, but I do have statuary, colorful clay pots, birdbaths, and even an old fashioned bicycle plant holder. I often sit out on my porch to admire the new look I did this year as compared to last... and I always find myself keeping very quiet lest the dogs beyond the fence hear me and start a barking tirade.

I can think of many times I could have been ratted out when watering during the summer restrictions, as the dogs would come to the fence and announce their presence. That would start up the dogs that lived next door to them to join in the festival of barking, and quickly I would shut off the hose. After a few minutes of the dogs claiming territorial rights with each other, the owners of both homes would come out to call the dogs off. After all, we do have an ordinance for noise pollution as well.... and barking dogs fall under that category. Once everyone was inside again, I resumed my watering.

It doesn't always take me being out there for the dogs from both yards to get going... all they have to do is hear themselves, and the barking commences. I really don't mind too much, because the owners are always on top of it, and always shouting out their back doors to call the dogs in, and I got to witness such a scene yesterday. As the dogs barked through their own fences at one another (beyond my sight as this was in their side yard), the owners once again shouted from their porch for silence and quite a few "get-over-here"'s. The neighbor dog behind me had a hard time with this one, this time. He walked down to the bottom of his yard, now within my sight.... then walked the length of the fence, looking up every other step to see his owner on the porch. The look on his face was priceless because you could just see that he wanted to push some boundaries. It was as if to say, "If I walk all the way over to the other side of the yard, and am quiet, can I please stay out?" I had to go inside to laugh, because I didn't want to start up the barking again.... and the dog looked like he really meant it.

As I was telling hubby the story, we came to the conclusion that dogs are certainly not stupid creatures. They are much like children: pushing and testing limits, regardless of wrangling through understanding the word "no" or "stop". Since they both have the luxury of time, and more patience than we do, their quest is non-stop for "yes" and "go", anything to get their way... and when all else fails, many will resort to the pouty face for the cute factor.

Funny how the animal world is not so different from us after all sometimes......

2006-09-21T14:23:00.000-04:00

breezy, beautiful and 74 degrees.........

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood.... one even Mr. Rogers would approve of. Of course this makes one want to push aside the paperwork and drudgery of the work day in order to enjoy the teasing of Indian Summer.

Slowly the trees are bowing from their weight of green, and being replaced by sprinklings of yellow and orange. It's just a hint here and there, but from the looks of the driveways and decks, Darwins theory of "survival of the fittest" is being seen by the many sweepings that have to be done in order not to track in the fallen foliage. Those leaves that were chewing practice to the squirrels, and did not buckle throughout the summer, are feeling the cool temperatures of the September night, and succumbing in an orderly fashion down to the ground. Very soon they'll cover everything, and I'll be forced to say goodbye to the beautiful impatiens that made it through the summer, but will not last the freeze soon on the horizon. It will be time to repot everything with winter pansies, while mulching the tannin of magnolia, dogwood, maple and oak tree leaves.

But that is for another day.... today I just want to enjoy the last remnants of great weather. A time when I no longer have to turn on any air conditioner, or whole house fan. The natural breezes are finding their way into my house all by themselves, and I am welcoming the cool nights that will be crisp soon enough. Besides Spring, Autumn is my favorite time of year, and I plan to steal a few minutes of it by myself, while I can.

This is true paradise, and I might just curl up with a good book and a cup of tea to further the feeling. How is weather in your part of the world today?

2006-09-13T21:00:00.000-04:00

my pretty city........

Welcome to Atlanta.... or as we would say: hey, y'all!

I've posted about Atlanta a few times in the past, but never accompanied them with nice pictures. Thank goodness google was able to step in and take over for me.

Since I'm not good with being able to move pictures around to where I'd like them to be in my posts... heck, I'm just lucky to just get them up here, I will try to explain them as best I can, and hope they hold their place when the real posting occurs.

The five people in the black and white photo goes all the way back to 1939, when the cast, author and producer of the movie, "Gone With The Wind" premiered in Atlanta at Loews Grand Theatre. The movie would go on to win eight academy awards, including best actress, best supporting actress, and best picture. Sadly, the author, Margaret Mitchell would die in a freak car accident ten years later, while trying to help her frail husband out of their car. She would step into traffic, and was hit by a drunk driver, dying five days later at Grady Hospital.
From left to right: Vivian Leigh, Clark Gable, Margaret Mitchell, David O. Selznick, and Olivia deHavilland. Best supporting actress, Hattie McDaniel, not pictured, would be the first woman of color to win an academy award, and the movie still holds the record for highest ticket sales (adjusted for inflation, of course).

The carving of the three gentleman riding, is Atlanta's Stone Mountain, the largest piece of exposed granite, and one of the largest monoliths in the world. It falls behind Mt. Augustus in Australia, and Haystack Rock in Oregon. Starting 300 million years ago, this massive stone is only one-third uncovered today. It is surrounded by forests, a man-made lake, and a small town named Stone Mountain. So, technically, it isn't within the city limits, but Atlanta has a habit of adopting in anything within it's reach, and Stone Mountain qualifies. It has been said that the second wave of the KKK was rooted on top of the mountain back in 1915, when men climbed to the top and burned a cross that could be seen from Atlanta, and it would be with funds raised by these men that the carving would come to fruition on the face of the mountain. Klansmen frequently held meetngs here, until the speech by Reverand King in 1964, when slowly the tides changed and the klansmen eventually were no longer welcomed in the area. Conceived in 1909, replicas of Stonewall Jackson, Robert E. Lee, and Jefferson Davis were finally completed in 1972..... after many years of starting, finishing, and redoing the carving itself many times over. Today, the mountain and surrounding area is all park land, with attractions that could occupy your time for the whole weekend. Between the anti-bellum house (complete with slave cabins), the skylift to the top, the grist mill, covered bridge, and paddle-wheel showboat that crosses the lake, there is also a welcome center that shows history of the area, an "old town" of gift shops, and a ride on SMARTA, the train that circles the base of the mountain. It is also the largest picnic area in the state.... probably the world. All this is set in the splendor of the forest, not dimmed by any cheesy amusement rides, or boardwalks. You even have the option of climbing the mountain from the backside, where during your crawl up the 1.1 miles to the top, you will see etchings on the granite ground of people who have tread there back in 1898. If you aren't too queasy to make the trip down by yourself, the skylift is a cool ride. Runners and bicyclists are a constant companion of the trails and roadways, and for those who prefer to sit and gaze, there is always the carving, which is used as a backdrop for laser shows at night. Can you see why Atlanta has adopted it?

The Fabulous Fox Theatre is a landmark that will always stand in the city amongst all of it's tall buildings. Built in the 1920's, and of Moorish design, the theatre is a bit dwarfed, but magnificent and spectacular in it's own way on opening night. I have been several times, and still wonder at it's beauty every time I walk through the front doors. The last time I went there was for my birthday to see the play, "Annie". A few girls and myself got gussied up for the evening, ate dinner across the street, and walked the few steps over to make sure we didn't miss our seats in the nose-bleed section. As I watched the show, I couldn't help but wander my eyes up to the ceiling (not too far away, mind you). It's a thing you do everytime you're inside, because the ceiling has twinkling stars, behind a projection of moving clouds, and you get the feeling you are watching the show underneath a calm and beautiful night sky. In 1974, the Fox was headed for the demolition ball, as Southern Bell wished to build their new headquarters on the site. It was saved by celebrities and concerned local citizens, and eventually added to the National Historic Landmark register. Since that time, the theatre and building in total has undergone a complete restoration to bring it back to it's former glory of it's Egyptian Ballrooms, and the Arabian courtyard stage of the 1920's.

The picture of the mansion with the colorful flowers in front is actually named The Swan House, located next door to the History Center Museum in Buckhead (a neighborhood north of the city hustle and bustle.) It never fails to bring someone from out of town there in the Spring, as all the flowers are in bloom, and you feel like you might have stepped back in time. It doesn't hurt living in the area either, as it is "old" money, and the residents mansions reflect as such. Not a blade of grass is out of sync, and your neighbor is the Govenor of the State. You should see his lawn!

Then we have Underground, which is located in the heart of Atlanta. After Sherman came through and bow-tied the railroad tracks, laying the city to complete devastation, the city fathers decided to build the new Atlanta over what was left as rubble, and destroyed store fronts. During the 1970's, builders who revived Boston's Fanueil Hall, came to Atlanta and rebuilt the underground area of the city into shops and restaurants. While it was popular for a short time, it gradually lost it's appeal, and became home to rats, homeless, and wind-blown garbage. In the 1990's, another team came in and revived it once again. Although it was a hot spot for a few years, many of those shops have come and gone, and Underground does not have the same amount of tourists it once did. However, it is still hanging on, and it is where we drop the "peach" on New Years Eve.

I haven't even scratched the surface, as Atlanta has many more places of note that attract many tourists. The Martin Luther King Memorial and eternal flame is located just a few blocks from the Capitol Building on Auburn Avenue. Back in the 1920's, Auburn Ave was the city's own Harlem of it's time. Music and the smells of great food permeated the air, while Ebenezer Church would launch it's most prolific preacher. Today, the neighborhood is only a shadow of it's former self, as it has been quite run down due to the mishandling of it's funds by the King off-spring. As much as they want the city to take over the grooming of the park area, they still want complete say in the handling of the funds (which have been proven to be mis-appropriated), and do not want the parks department to do any more than all the work.
By complete contrast, the Jimmy Carter Library is completely handled by the Parks and Recreation Department (and government funds) , and you will see beautiful lawns and gardens well taken care of, and the wonderful historical papers of our only President from the state of Georgia.

I have been to all of these sites, and many more, as I wanted to know everything I could about this city..... how it breathed, and what stood where before it was reduced to rubble. In my journeys, I have come to see Atlanta as a city that doesn't know how to stop. Just take a gander at it's traffic problems, and you would want to head to the hills to live. Which is precisely what has happened, as the city now has engulfed the surrounding towns, heading forever outward in acquiring landscape. They may be named an entirely different name than Atlanta, but they still are considered part of the metro area. That's alright by the citizens though, as we are a proud bunch anyway. We have wonderful Universities, sports teams, and eateries..... not to mention the largest aquarium in the world (except the actual ocean itself). We don't stop, and we can't be pushed aside, we are Olympians in our quest to constantly build past our boundaries, and it shows through the many trees and parks that are still left.

So.... if you ever make it to my pretty city, make sure to look me up. You'll be invited in for a tall glass of very sweet iced tea, and many rich stories of a city that knows what it is to grow past the rubble it started with during Reconstruction. There is no doubt that the best seasons are Spring and Fall.... and better yet, you don't even need to bring a coat. Atlanta is just that nice during those fair seasons.

2006-09-11T07:00:00.000-04:00

our heartache......

They were our pride and joy; the measure of everything tall and magnificent in a country rich in resources and ideas. They were the landmark that let me know that home to New England was only a few hours away, and the one sight I always looked forward to on my journeys north. I made it a point to make sure we saw them on the horizon whenever we traveled through the city. It was more difficult to see the Statue of Liberty, but the twin towers rose out of the horizon stretching to the heavens far beyond any other building that stood by their side. Then I watched them both crumble to a pile of dust and twisted metal in a matter of seconds, and my heart ached for the people who weren't fortunate enough to make it out, trapped in the rubble of the remains. Many would not make it out, and the toll loss would number close to 3,000 people, between the occupants of the Twin Towers, the planes, and the second target of the Pentagon.

We were stunned, shocked, and unbelieving of all the events unfolding.... as never before had we ever been directly attacked in the lower 48 to such extremes. And to find out that we had trained the very men who took this bold step against us, was akin to being slapped in the face. As we sifted through our anguish and anger over the events, the skies were freakishly quiet. The flags went up around the country in a show of our solidarity, and funerals were planned for those who weren't so lucky to make it through the day.

We now come to the fifth anniversary of September 11th, and that gives us time to sit back and reflect all the events that have followed since. Finding ourselves embroiled in a war on terrorism that stretches across the globe, the loss numbers of our service men and woman looms well past the 2,000 mark..... not to mention the countless number of Iraq civilians, foreign servicemen, and news correspondents caught in the wrong place at the wrong time, as suicide bombers and kidnappers complete their missions.

Reports of personnel, who gave of their time to help clean up the rubble left by the towers' collapse, are suffering lung diseases from all the dust they inhaled on the site, even though they were assured by the EPA that levels of toxins were minimal, and "safe".

The already slipping US economy was said to have dove into a recession in the immediate weeks following 9/11, although the government later stated that was false (cough, cough). Business did slow down considerably following the attacks, and although we are told that our economy is strong now, I just don't see it. I know of too many people who are either out of work or struggling to keep their heads above major debt-load handed to them in the form of utilities and everyday living expenses.

Meanwhile the war-chest funds are constantly being re-calculated to support whatever is necessary to get these "evil-doers". We saw that promise by our own leader, declaring it on top of the rubble at ground zero. Well, the money does have to come from somewhere, doesn't it? In our looking to our leader for reasons why, we forgot to ask the question of how.

Other countries who are our allies, have been exposed to varying degrees of terrorism they had never had to deal with. This was pre-9/11, but it also has been post 9/11.... and the terrorists have been deadly at all of their targets. Citizens going about their daily life, once again, in the wrong place at the wrong time, became victims of terrorism, in Europe, as well as all around the world.

Our country takes the helm in leading this fight, and our leader has tried to justify every one of them as they come up at different intervals through the years. Funny how they seem to contradict the ones before them, but we are becoming accustomed to the secrets, fence-jumping, and redirections handed to us as excuses. The means are being suited to justify the end result, and just to make sure we are all in this together, terrorism is the headliner.... because, after all, we did witness it happen on our own land already. That's enough to make one a little more aware of their surroundings...... whether they're willing to admit it or not.

So, five years later, and still on the road to recovery for some, we mark a time in our life that defines like no other before, and we say silent prayers for the victims and heros. Funny thing about recovery.... it doesn't mean we forget the event, only that we learn new ways to adapt to the changes it brings. We find ways to live with the consequences of an environment that has been forever changed, and we hope for a future where the children of the world will not be burdened with the everlasting effects of today.

To those people that gave so much of themselves on September 11th, to the fallen victims, heros, and family members that have to carry on without their loved ones, I extend my deepest heartfelt thoughts. You will be remembered.

2006-09-08T08:00:00.000-04:00

the time machine.....

Given an opportunity to decide whether we would like to travel through time, most of us would probably jump at the chance. If it meant the possibility of reuniting with a loved one, now deceased, or correcting a wrong deed, I believe more people would choose to travel backwards. Why not...... somehow it seems so uncomplicated to do so, other than the possibility of time travel existing at all. There are a few that would choose to go forward to see the state of affairs the world exists in the future; but all in all, most people would still want the possibility, regardless of which way they go,
for the back door to remain open.... as coming back to where we start is a powerful pull. Somehow the feeling of home, and a comfort zone is where we still do our best work. After all, home will always be where our heart is, as the comforts it supplies is familiar territory.

We don't travel through time though, do we? We are only offered the opportunity to travel through mapped space, which has changed as much as we have, in most cases. Our suitcases are loaded with memories of a time when everything seemed a little more paced, and we approached everything with fresh eyes and a new attitude. The experience we've gained while the years passed has made us a little more cynical, because we know too much. Regardless, it is still a trip we take with newer, wider eyes.... trying to capture a glimpse of the past, a simple reminder of where we started, while taking in all the changes we see before us.

Somehow it's become easier to make these trips without even leaving the comfort of home. When you age, those memories flood you at the most in-opportune times. You find yourself day-dreaming about past occurrences that might overlap into current affairs of your now time. It can't be helped, it's all you have to rely on.... it's a lifes experience of lessons you wished you knew when you existed then, as it might have made all the difference of where you are now.
I can't complain, but I always compare regardless. It's my own system of checks and balances,
and reviewing it over from time to time is healthy for my soul.

I'm beyond the point of sheer panic in the leaner times than I once was. In my past, I would have gotten a F in that area. I'm not quite at A- level yet, but being a middle of the road child, I'm nearing a nice strong NB..... Not Bad. Ok, so I made that mark up.... it doesn't matter though, as it's an improvement; one that age makes you wear so well, if you do it right. Besides, I've had a lot of experiences that warranted behavior and civility over the likes of shouting and arguing. They say that practice makes perfect...... well, it's true. You do need to walk through a pile of garbage many times over before you convince your olfactory nodes that it's really a pile of roses. Attitude speaks volumes, and it's your biggest stick of defense. I'm still working on that one, but am so much further down the line then when I was in my 20's and 30's. To sum it up: life is too short to sweat all the small stuff..... and a lot of it is small stuff.

No doubt bigger problems arise, as it's a fact of life. Holding up that Louisville Slugger to bat away the issues gets hard and tiring, but surviving the hostage situation it becomes, canonizes you to survivor status. It's a pothole mess for a road, but the ride nonetheless toughens up your back end. The will and fight to go on is a powerful naturally induced drug when called upon..... it's proof you possess persistence.

We already know we can't travel either way in time..... at least for right now. However, our mind does play funny little games with our memories as we grow older. It's the only way we can frolic through the game of time travel for now. We tend to look back to a safer period of our psyche as the worlds problems become mountainous to fix. The images that fill our TV screens and news headlines seem out of control, and the men we depend on to fix the problems appear helpless and relentless in their strife. We play a new game of hindsight when facts become available, while we pray for the innocent victims caught in the middle. We hope that the scholars and leaders can recall the past long enough to remember the previous mistakes in order to not repeat them, as we want so much for them to repair the future now. If they take a little trip through history.... a little time travel back so to speak, they might be able to see the follys we are trying to correct now.... at least we hope so. But that is a lot to rely on, isn't it? Especially when we have little faith in the leadership presenting their solutions.

So I guess it is up to us individually to make baby steps in order to correct injustices we face daily. We may not be able to go back and correct the wrong things, but hopefully we learn from these and vow not to repeat them.

........just some odd thoughts I was having today, and thanks for indulging my ramblings.

2006-09-05T03:30:00.000-04:00

what if we threw a war and nobody showed up......

In his Presidential farewell speech to the nation in 1961, Dwight D. Eisenhower warned the American people of a powerful menace, that unleashed, could be the very demise of our nation as well as the world. He wasn't the first president to do so, as George Washington's words warned the country of the very same dangers many years before.
A country that places all their faith, time, and money in weapons and military does little to help the commonwealth of a country grow and live in peace.
Eisenhower would pen the phrase "military industrial complex", and warned that if left unchecked, power would rise beyond control of citizen votes, and into one of military and government rule. Any of this sounding familiar? You betcha! We are in the midst of this menace now with no exit plan we can count on.

We have already traveled to this abyss since Eisenhowers speech when we entered into Vietnam. Even the most trusted man in America (Walter Cronkite) spoke out against the "war" (which it really was, but nobody wanted to call it that), saying it was unwinable. It was then that Lyndon Johnson knew that if he had lost the confidence of Mr. Cronkite, he had lost the support of middle America. It was one of the reasons why Johnson dropped out of the Presidential race in 1968. The American public had had enough, and were looking for a way to bring their boys home. To them, this was a civil war of which we had no reason to be part of; and not just the poor of this country were fighting it, as drafted boys were taken from all walks of american life. It took a few years, because there is no easy way to shut off a war, but a peace agreement was signed in 1973, and we finally pulled out altogether by April 1975. Just a year before, President Nixon was caught in the throes of the Watergate scandal, which had led to his downfall and ultimate resignation. Gerald Ford, through complete default, assumed the office of President.... and he had a very large job ahead of him in trying to reassemble the trust lost by the American people in their government. It proved a hard road to walk, and Ford committed political suicide by pardoning Nixon of any wrong-doing in the Watergate scandal, either then or in the future. Many Americans did not see that Ford's major concern was to put the past behind us, and forge on ahead to the future and healing. Ford would lose in the polls to Jimmy Carter over that decision.

One of Fords cronies from the "old days" in the House of Representatives was Donald Rumsfeld. When Ford assumed the Presidency, Rumsfeld was called back to Washington to serve as a transition chairman, and then on to the position of White House Chief of Staff. It was during this time that Rumsfeld introduced a friend by the name of Richard Cheney to Mr. Ford, who would become an assistant to the President. This is the point in time where Rumsfeld and Cheney began a political coup of consolidating power in the American government. Their first orders of business were to remove Henry Kissinger from the post of National Security Advisor, tell Nelson Rockefeller (Ford's vice president at the time) to look for a new job, and have Defense Secretary, James Schlesinger fired. They then assumed the positions for themselves: Rumsfeld became the Defense Secretary, and Cheney became Chief of Staff.

With Fords defeat in the presidential election of 1976 (of which Cheney was campaign manager for) , Rumsfeld returned to the private sector, but still held many positions under the leadership of Ronald Reagan and George HW Bush. Cheney was elected to the House of Representatives from Wyoming, becoming Chairman of House Republican Conference from 1981 to 1987, and in 1988 he would become House Minority Whip. From March of 1989 to January 1993, Cheney would serve under President George HW Bush as Secretary of Defense. After Bush Senior failed to secure a second term in office, Cheney returned to the private sector as well. This is the time where he secured his little job at Halliburton as CEO and Chairman of the Board.

In 1997, Rumsfeld and Cheney formed a think-tank called "Project for the New American Century", whose self-stated goal was to "promote American global leadership." The PNAC promotes itself to be a non-profit organization of major political players and well known pundits, all in the belief that American leadership is good both for America and for the world. There are seven basic core views and beliefs, but in a nutshell, it has a classy way of promoting the American nation of becoming the worlds police. Some of these beliefs are good, but as in the debacle over the start of the Iraq "conflict", the words of the wordsmiths rarely estimate the actual effects, and most estimates are blown out of proportion to state a cause...... All except the loss to life, sadly. I can say that I don't agree with a few, but I'll let you judge them for yourselves. If you look it up under wikipedia, all seven are listed.

So the military industrial complex has grown into four branches, where it once had three. The military, defense, and Congress made up the first three arms...... and, as of 1997, this complex includes a think tank to counsel the first three how to behave or act accordingly. All it needed to become effective was the event of "a match to a powder keg" to give it a nice test run. Enter the Bush Junior administration, with Mr. Cheney as Vice President, and Mr. Rumsfeld as Defense Secretary...... the same players of the first Iraq invasion under Bush Senior.

The American people were easily upset over the events of 9/11, as was the world. Our decision to go into Afghanistan to hunt for Bin Laden was justified, met with no big resistance, and was accomplished to the point of knocking the Taliban out of control, all within a relatively short amount of time. Bin Laden is still elusive to capture, though, so we leave our military to complete the one last detail of Bin Laden's arrest.
Here's where the lines get fuzzy in the eyes of our current administration. Even though the CIA Director, George Tennent had no real evidence or intelligence that Saddam Hussein or Iraq might be stockpiling weapons of mass destruction, or any large ties to Bin Laden, Tennent was told to go back and look through his files again.... to find SOMETHING. This process usually takes many years to gather, but Tennent was given two weeks. The Bush administration was hell bent on finding anything that linked Iraq and Bin Laden, because this would be the premise to make us step in and declare war on a country that posed as a threat. Funny thing is, we supported Hussein and Iraq in 1983 and 1984 when Rumsfeld was the special envoy to the Middle East, while Iraq and Iran were at war. (Just as we backed Afghanistan against Russia during the 1980's.) Ironic how yesterdays neighbors became today's enemies.

Going on evidence of a scientist who had escaped the Middle East, evidence that was mostly false, Tennent found his "slam dunk", and the American people were told that a major threat against our nation was imminent in the form of more terrorism. Still reeling from the events of 9/11, we bought into it..... even though the evidence was sketchy at best. Colin Powell may have addressed the United Nations prior to the first strike on Iraq , that Hussein was a threat, yet he still remained skeptical of the intelligence in front of him to confirm the WMD theory. It contained many facts left out or misconstrued to fit an agenda. He would later acknowledge that information, sources had supplied him with, were wrong; Powell then called upon a reform in the intelligence community.

What we can speculate through all that we've been able to weed through, is that the situation we are in the midst of now, was part of an agenda all along. The Middle East has been a hotbed of disruption for many years....... and why do we care? Because they hold the precious black gold every country needs to function: OIL. Notice how we didn't go into Rwanda to save their people from an oppressive society, and that's because they really don't have anything to give us in return. Anyway.... I'm getting off subject here. My point is this:

As Americans, it is our responsibility as free citizens to be able to point at our leaders and demand true leadership. Why? Because we elected them in those positions on the promises they gave us during their long months of campaigning. We want to believe that a person's word exudes trust, and a mans word is his bond. After all, the alternative is opposite to our own beliefs, so we vote in those who issues mirror our own.
Even when they come into office, I'm pretty sure they wanted the job not only for the prestige of the position, they probably really wanted to make a difference. Then the problems of the world, as well as breaking through the "old boys club" attitude were roadblocks they hadn't considered. Add to that the lobbiests deals made under the table, and we now have a controlled government.... held hostage by it's own decision-makers. This is why it is important to pay attention to who the candidates are.... they may be in charge one day, and like our current administration, play a bit of nepotism. They may also lead us into foreign disturbances under the guise of terrorism.

We have much to be afraid of as we watch the events of the Middle East unfold. Since terrorism is not contained to one country, the threat can be as close as our neighbors house.... so it's not all that unfathomable in the big picture. The problem is, we are reeling from these threats on a closer and steadier basis than we ever had before, and they are not contained to the US alone. Perhaps we stirred a hornets nest by invading Iraq, one which our collective politicians never saw coming..... as a matter of fact, they more than likely felt that it was the other way around. Perhaps this was all a matter time time before fruition anyway. Either way, our current terrorism is not going to go away quickly, even if we pull all our troops out today. We are in for a very long haul, as we try to comprehend some sense of dignity and semblance out of it.

We used to have a saying during the Vietnam War years that I have remembered to this day:
What if we threw a war and nobody showed up? Sadly, we'll never know.

2006-08-31T19:06:00.000-04:00

brother can you spare a dime.......

It's been said that money makes the world go round, and there is no doubt that one who has wealth has an easier go on their budget, than one who does not. There is a certain amount of freedom that financial affairs can tend to, making the stress of everyday life untroubling monetarily, if you are part of the 1% who acquire a yearly wage of $100,000.00 or more. The other 99% of us make much less and are mostly part of the group commonly known as "middle class", which only means that most of us are living just above the poverty line anyway.

We are the group that essentially pay for every side of the spectrum. Taxes taken out of our paychecks ensure that medicaid carries on (although it has it's own issues to deal with), while our federal government can willy nilly away money to projects that will never really affect us in our lifetime anyway. Large corporations who make millions upon millions of dollars have artful tax accountants and lawyers that know the loop-holes of deductions.... therefore the middle class tax dollars are usually the funding element that supplements revenue needed.

Most households contain two income family members that see to it that food is on the table, the mortgage is paid, and taxes are dealt with. It has become a way of life for many middle classers, because without the income of two people to keep the family structure afloat, it can become to easy to drift into the ocean of poverty if we don't generate revenue to the contrary. Heck, we can easily float into poverty even if we have two incomes, yet spend too liberally. It's all too easy to fall into the vicious cycle once we get started, especially if we want "stuff".

I've worked hard all my life, and this is no secret to anybody who knows me. When I was a freshman in High School I started working by cleaning summer cabins, babysitting, and generally doing anything that would earn me money. I've even picked apples off the trees in an apple farm so that I could earn $10.00 for the day. Needless to say, I quit that job after the first day, as I knew I had a better capacity to be more useful in other areas. Regardless, it was a job I took on because I was $10.00 short of the money I needed to pay for driving lessons the following Monday at school. I also babysat houses for people who were going away on vacation for the week that didn't want to leave their house empty...... one which included a ghost that liked to play funny tricks on me. I filled in for my Mother at my Dad's office, doing accounting work, typing letters, and answering the phone.

After my High School graduation, my Father sat me down on the front steps to our house and had a long talk with me. It was here that he explained the real meaning of life I would have to deal with in the future. He asked me what my plans were for my future, and silly me, I told him that I would probably get married, have a few kids, and that wonderful white picket fence house I always wanted. "Geez," he said, "What if your husband decides to leave you for his secretary.... or better yet, what if he succumbs to an early death and leaves you with children to take care of, what are you going to do then?" I had no answers, and the tears started flowing easily, because he hadn't drilled me like that before, and all I could see was my future down the drain, when I hadn't even really lived yet. He told me that it was important the I come up with a salable skill.... something that would always earn me money, even if it wasn't a lot, but something to get me into the work force and sustain me if the worst possible scenario happened. Starting at the bottom of a company would surely lead me to the top, as I am a quick learner. To this day, it is still one of the best pieces of advice I've ever had, and I made sure to have the same talk to my son, who poo-pooed my lecture with a shake of his wrist. Not to worry, one day it will all come back to him.... of this I have no doubt.

So instead of going to college, I went into the working world, and never looked back.... except for a small class I took in Interior Design while I was still single. When my son was born, I did take time off to be with him for the first couple of years. Since I was against having anyone raising him but myself, I took the helm and stayed out of the work force to teach him the alphabet, numbers, and even made charts of objects he knew so that he could learn the words. We made wonderful progress, and a lot of Sesame Street programs later, his vocabulary was astounding. Then I noticed a major change in myself. I could no longer communicate with adults.... I was, for lack of a better term, a mental midget. I did not have any friends who had babies the same time I did that lived close, and no real adults to talk with on a daily basis. This condition was so bad that I actually invited some Johovah's Witnesses in one day to have tea, as I needed to talk with someone who was my own age. Hubby worked 2nd shift as a chef in a hotel, so he mainly slept during the day, only getting up at 1 pm to get ready for the 3:00 shift. So, yup, I got bored too. It was here that I decided to make another change and reinvent my lifestyle just a tad. I entered my son in a Mothers Morning Out program (very new at the time) where he was able to be with peers and learn structure outside the home. During my freedom of 4 hours in the morning, I went back to work cleaning apartments, as I needed to generate some revenue into the household without having the constraints of a 9 to 5 job. If I ever wanted to move out of the apartment we lived in and into a real house with a yard, I had to do something other than be at home... I had to earn some money somewhere. Besides, babies aren't cheap, and we were just scratching by on the salary hubby generated.

No, I didn't make a killing, but I was able to enroll my son into a structured daycare school ( and I emphasize school here) where they took great care of him. I had a hard time in the potty-training area, and they took completely over. How wonderful peer pressure can be when you have a stubborn child. To me, it was a great relief, and well worth the $75.00 I shelled out every week. And he loved it! The teachers were wonderful souls who took the time to bring the children on field trips, taught them to swim, and held structured classes. Needless to say, my son flourished, and I could get a real job so we could move out of the apartment we were living in and give him a real yard to play in. When he turned six, we finally were able to take that leap and buy a little house that was a bit of a fixer-upper. The fixing up part would still take many years to achieve, but at least we were out and on our way.

I went through a variety of waitressing jobs (easy, quick money) and was finally able to secure a loan so I could buy a restaurant I was working at that the owners had had enough of. Along with two other partners we kept the restaurant afloat for 18 months before we closed the doors in 1998, and went strictly to catering. With the overhead unloaded off our backs, we did flourish in our field, and started making some serious money. Now I could afford to fix up the simple house and bring it out of the 1970's brown "rut". I could also afford to pay off ALL my debts and buy the 4th vehicle I've ever owned so that I would no longer have to run catering orders and equipment in a hyundai hatchback. Things were starting to look up, yet I still did not squander my money away. I didn't move out of my house, I didn't book trips to Europe, I never have gone to a hairdresser or spa for special treatment, and I don't wear jewelry. I sunk money into a Roth and IRA SEP account, putting it to work for me, while I learned to landscape my yard, and renovate my house. Then 9/11 happened, and catering was considered a perk to corporations who bought lunches for their employee meetings. Revenue went down ever so slightly at first, then the bottom dropped out in May 2005 when my biggest account found a caterer who would charge 50 cents less per person for dinner entrees.... leaving only a voice mail to the effect that they wanted to try other options, and never returning my phone calls to see if we could still compete. Since they were 50% of my yearly revenue, we suffered a big hit. It was time for a re-tooling our business, and we are still in the process of keeping ourselves afloat over this today. Easy come, easy go.... but since I come from meager roots, I never let it get me too far down, because I still know the power of bargains and inexpensive shopping techniques.

So, did I make the wrong move to become my own boss? Did I compromise the welfare of my child because I put him in daycare to pursue a piece of the American dream? Not on your life! I have been able to teach him many things in spite of the fact that he spent some years in daycare. I made sure to verse him in techniques of home economics early, and explained that it was my job to send him out in the world ready to tackle simple tasks such as laundry, baking, cooking dinner, yardwork, credit card statements, check-writing, thank-you notes, job expectations, car problems, and a plethora of menial and daily tasks it takes to get through the day. I did this to ensure the fact that one day he will become a husband, and I didn't want his wife to point a finger at me and say, "Why didn't you teach this boy anything?", because I knew that between his father and I, we have covered the basics. In all of this, he still maintains a 3.8 GPA in college, and I don't anticipate that he will ever be standing on a street corner asking passersby if they can spare a dime. One day he may even be his own boss.... he's just that willful, and I'm just that lucky to have him for a son.

2006-08-28T17:30:00.000-04:00

the big easy, part deux.....

It has been a year since Katrina came slamming into the Gulf Coast, leaving behind devastation the likes of which were hard to comprehend. For days we sat by our TV sets to watch the events unfold before our eyes.....as we did on September 11th. It seemed impossible to comprehend the miles of drowned and destroyed towns, as well as the landscape that had wiped away during the destruction of this hurricane, yet it was before us in every news telecast and cable news broadcast. We heard stories of people stranded at the Astrodome, and we saw countless images of other folks trapped on rooftops with signs pleading for help. All the time we wondered in the back of our minds why these people hadn't left. Didn't they know this was the "big one"? We were to find out plenty, and not enough, in the days that followed.

To say our hearts went out to these unfortunate people caught in the path was an understatement.... our hearts bled for them. How could they not? This one storm redefined the term "ultimate natural destruction", and will forever go down in the books as the measure to which all storms going forward are measured by. We did that with the "big ones" of the past: Camille, Andrew and Betsy to name a few. They pale in comparison to Katrina now.

So today we mark the first anniversary of Katrina; which will include a few speeches, pats on the back, and photo ops for the powers that be. And what do we know a year later? Well, we do know that it will still take a long time to put this area back together. That houses were leveled to their foundations, and others that did survive are uninhabitable due to mold and unsanitary conditions, means this project is not something we can clear away as easily as we have done other disasters in the past. This is not something contained to a mile radius..... as it continues on through miles and miles of towns and villages located on the coast, as well as far back inland.
This one storm also came to redefine the charts of insurance coverage. Most insurance companies that you might have been happily paying to for the last 20 years or so are now dropping coverage if you live within 5 miles OF a coast, or raising your rates to astronomical heights.

We also came to find out that people who had no connection to this event used the disadvantage of others to get a piece of the voucher pie that the government issued to the victims. One person was caught spelling her name in a variety of ways in order to receive multiple vouchers. Since there was no real way for the government to check the identity of the people, this practice was easy prey. We also found out that many people who used the vouchers did not do so for the purchase of necessary supplies, but rather for new toys from their wish list.

We know that there are still many displaced folks who still haven't moved back into the region.... as a matter of fact, the phone book for the greater New Orleans area has shrunk to 1/4th of what it previously was. We can't really blame them for being a little leary, after all, one rarely wants to return to the place of fright and ill feelings. For those who called the Gulf Coast their home, and wouldn't let a little hurricane drive them away, have stuck to rebuilding as best they can.... and with whatever help and resources they can get. That takes a lot of guts, a lot of sweat, and a lot of love.

For the folks who used this disaster as personal gain, shame on you for taking advantage of those who truly needed the help. You are a blot on society for your actions. For those who put down their hectic lives and joined in to help out others more needy than yourselves, consider yourself anointed to a higher level human standards. You are the heros, and you will be the folks who bring this lovely piece of real estate back to it's former glory.

And now we wait to see what Ernesto will do......

2006-08-27T10:00:00.000-04:00

life in the fast lane.....

Words to the wise.... my sign this week has nothing to do with the way I lead my life. If nothing else, it should read: Hey stupid! You're too old to be moving that fast!
But alas, I'm too stubborn to pay attention.... beside there's much to do, and too many people counting on me to get it done. Nothing worse than being your own OCD counselor.

I've been absent from the blogsphere for the past several days for a multitude of reasons. First and foremost was that blogger and I had a strange relationship to deal with. When I was ready to comment or post, blogger decided to shut down. When blogger was ready for me, I was off getting ready for back-to-back weddings I was catering this weekend. Does the phrase "two ships in the night" ring any bells here? I finally decided to get done what I could, and leave the rest till I could get to it. It compromised my OCD tendencies, but the little fellows on my shoulders were having a hard time keeping up with the arguments, so the brain finally stepped in and took control. Lucky for me, I still have that safety net in place.

It hardly seems like a week from my mini-vacation.... and all I have left to remember it by is a two inch bear I bought in the mountains. (Well, that and plenty of good memories of a great trip, and lots of beautiful birthday presents.) Hubby and I decided to prolong our return home last Monday, and stopped many times on the way to view the pullover vista sights, as well as a few gift shops. It also gave us the opportunity to stretch our legs from the ride. Since we are reaching the age of trick knees and warped hips, it did us well to stop. Nothing hurts more than driving too long, then hobbling out of the car to the creaks of bones and muscle trying to straighten out and remember what walking is like again.

Since I decided to slack off one more day, I took an extra vacation day (Tuesday) to do stuff around the yard, as well as the house. The gardens did well in my absence, as there was a hard rain that passed through. I bow to the rain Gods once more for saving the farm, as it were, and saving me an extra job of watering everybody. The flowers greeted me with their boldness of color, as their long stemmed arms reached to applaud my return. Did they actually miss me? Who knows, but I was pleased that they survived well. A little mow to the long haired lawn, a little nip and tuck to the trimming of the beds, and all was beautiful in the land of Ellen again. Woohoo, except for the tired muscles at the end of the day.

Then it was time to throw myself back into catering work, and there was plenty of it that needed straightening out. My partners did a good job of taking the orders, but it all stopped there. I was left with tablecloths to wash (which I am just getting to now), papers to file, messages to return, money to deposit, silverware to roll and equipment to pack for the two weddings we did this weekend, as well as supplies to gather. I felt like the old woman of the shoe, who had too many kids, she didn't know what to do.... except my kids were all tasks. Setting the priorities, they were all tackled, and I only have one catering to deliver today, then I can enjoy what's left of my weekend..... all few hours of it.

So I hope you will all forgive me for not responding to your wonderful comments on my last post till today, while I have the few moments between tackling the mountain of laundry I was left with from the weekend. I did finally get into blogger (which seems to work nicer in the morning), and will travel around to see all the wonderful posts you all have written as well.

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend~

2006-08-23T16:10:00.000-04:00

saying goodbye to my forties.......

One always looks forward to the single day of the year when it's time to bring out the cake loaded with candles, in order to celebrate the passing of another year. We always feel a little bit more taller, a little bit wiser, and a little bit more older, and with good reason........ we are!

As a child, the day never comes fast enough, and it seems like an eternity before you can claim the day as yours. It's almost as bad as waiting for Christmas. You know the presents are in hiding, the preparations readied, and the treats already baked or ordered, but the waiting part of the equation drives you into high anticipation. That is until you get to my age. At this point, you do all you can to recall the days, months, and years.... to bring back some semblance of youth and agility that were captured and taken prisoner to the age-Gods. Whether you like it or not, the process is non-negotiable. In order to get here, you must surrender your youth. Not that this is a bad thing to do, as the wisdom you gain is a very big part of the payoff in your favor.

This year I say goodbye to my forties. I turned 49 last Sunday, and I have exactly 362 days left till I hit the half century mark in my life. To say it's been a wild crazy ride would be a slight exaggeration, as the roller coaster knows no bounds to the bends and turns of the track. Whether it's been a fair one or otherwise, it's a ride I strapped into once I left my mother's womb..... and it's been a lot of fun no matter the consequences I've stumbled upon. I'm not wealthy, but I am very rich in other areas. These were always the sustainable factors that kept me from doing things that could have put me into far deeper trouble than I ever bargained for. A good set of standards and morals, a wonderful, loving family, and great friends from all over the globe have been my survival technique..... even though it has taken me this long to realize the secret of my wealth. Perhaps I knew it all along, but for some reason, was never able to identify the actual recipe. What matters is that I know this now.

So being 49 is not a bad thing at all. There are some days I still feel like I'm the 20 year old carefree girl, and some days I feel 80 (especially after a long day on my feet). It really doesn't matter, as it all balances out at the end of the day. I'm only too glad hubby didn't decide to order a cake with all the candles, as it would have resembled the burning of Atlanta all over again. We couldn't have that now, could we?

As for my little get-away to the Smokies...... I had the best time! Nothing greater than a trip to the mountains, family singing Happy Birthday (twice), and lots of cool presents to open. If this is any indication of how the year will go, then bring it on!

2006-08-16T22:55:00.000-04:00

time for the getaway......

Waiting all year for vacation moments to arrive has most of us preoccupied, in our stolen moments, from the everyday bustle of life.

Finally I get to go out of town for real.... out of state even. No one will be able to reach me, cause I'll be at a cabin in the mountains for 3 whole nights!

Yippee!

I hear cell reception is not so good up there so that little advise that Karl left on my last post is worthy of doing: Leave the cell phone on my kitchen table, as reception is better there.

I wish everyone a wonderful weekend in advance, and I'll be back on Tuesday to check in and read all the wonderful posts you will leave for me.

and..... A very special Happy Birthday to my friend, Neo. May you live long and prosper, grasshopper!

xo~

2006-08-14T19:10:00.000-04:00

vacation time......

Well..... four days off in a row will qualify, even if it isn't a full week.

Wouldn't I love to be that fat cat on the couch, one paw on the remote, and another on a cold drink. I'll opt for something different than the beer though. Just the thought of not having to answer a phone for four whole days is making me giddy with glee. It's time to decompress for a bit, and vacation time is a drug you won't find in a pharmacy.

Of course there are a million things to prepare for. Making sure you have all the right outfits, shoes and personal items, and for me, it would be my hairbrush. I cannot get any other brush through my hair successfully, and with hair as long as mine, it's an essential personal item.
I also pack the car with drinks, some snacks, and pillows. We might as well make the best that we can to be comfortable with a long ride ahead of us, as this year the family chose The Smoky Mountains. It wouldn't have been my choice, as we all know how much I love the beach, but this was something decided months back. I wasn't even sure I could take the time off, so the chance to leave town for any reason (even if it wasn't the beach) is a good excuse to not be around for a few days.

In the meantime, there are chores to be completed to ready for this trip, and the pile gets bigger everyday.... no matter how many tasks I seem to complete. Being the bee is the order of the week till Friday when I take off. I can be the cat in the car..... nestled in my pillow, and sleeping peacefully. Yup, I am long overdue for the time away........ but for now, I must return to work.

Four days till TGIF......

2006-08-11T19:15:00.000-04:00

rumblings from the sky.......

I don't know about you, but I love to watch thunderstorms ......from the safety of my porch, of course. If I didn't have to worry about being struck, I'd stand out in the middle of a field to watch them.

Hubby and I had the opportunity to pull up front-row seats to a storm that passed through this past weekend. We opened up the garage door, set up comfy chairs, a couple of tea cocktails, and waited for the show to begin. We were not disappointed in the entertainment or antics of the many bolts that came close. A few times we inched back further into the garage because the sound was deafening, and the flash of light (followed by counting to ten) was revealed that the lightening was indeed closer than we thought. The electricity flickered a few times, until it went out completely. There went the air conditioning inside the house..... but at least the outside air had cooled down to a comfortable 80 degrees, compared to the 97 degrees it was just minutes before.

Every night this past week, and several before that, the sky has rumbled and rocked. It hasn't always produced rain as I wished, but I live in a weather void area.....which means it might rain at my neighbors house, while I have full sunshine. I've always wondered about the line of demarcation when it came to storms. What is the actual point where bad weather stops, and good weather starts? I have finally found that spot in my state; it's somewhere near my yard. Strange, but true. I have driven home in a blinding rainstorm, only to get to my street where the birds are chirping, and the squirrels are frolicking about to gather nuts in the gracious sunshine..... not a care in the world to the impending onslaught that may or may not happen.

Maybe they know something I don't, or maybe they are like me. I've gotten to the point where I don't have too much trust in the weather report unless I'm watching it first hand from my window. Yes, it's nice to know about tornados heading my way, and I am grateful to the weathermen who let us know when to evacuate to the basement.... but for the little stuff, I part the curtains. Somehow the map they have is a bit inaccurate to the landscape I'm familiar with. Well, at least it's that way when I watch the Weather Channel. Local news is a better indicator..... they know street names and neighborhoods I can identify.

Yet, hubby is a Weather Channel-watching fool. He could watch it for hours. I like the Storm Stories they have on from time to time, and it's peaked my interest to do one of those dare-devil storm-tracker vacations..... but otherwise, I'd rather snap in a good movie, and wait for the real thing to dominate the sky. That could be a little dangerous, as tornados have popped up out of relatively small storms, but living in that weather-void area, they seem to tumble all around me, not on me. I did have a close call when my son was little. A huge bolt came down and hit the neighbors yard behind me, and traveled in their house via their outside light system. It fried every piece of electronics that was plugged in. I watched it unfold before my eyes, as I just happened to be looking out the window at the precise moment the bolt struck the ground. It was a bit scary, but I'm on a different electricity system than they are, and it never affected me. You see, my house and yard is the line between my little hamlet and the next town north. My back fence is the town line..... another reason for my silly theory about weather-void.

Tonight was no different. The sky has been rumbling for a few hours. We did get enough rain so that I won't have to sneak out and water the poor thirsty gardens, but so much damage has been done by the heat and sun already. My grass is hanging in as best as it can; I've been afraid to take the mower to it, lest I stress out the roots more. The flowers still get all the attention, so they are doing well, but it is a struggle to keep them happy. Most of the beds contain impatiens which are colorful, lovely, and proven growers. The only problem is, they are thirsty buggers, and demand gallons of water on a daily basis.... sometimes twice a day. So when the skies open up, I am grateful to the rain Gods, that I have been spared another chore for the day.

What's that I hear..... more droplets coming down..... ahhh! If this keeps up, I won't have to break any water banning laws for another day or so. Great! Now I can snap in the new Batman movie I've been dying to watch!

2006-08-10T14:00:00.000-04:00

thursday funny.....

I was sent this via e-mail this afternoon:

Subject: Political Science Lesson

John, the farmer, was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called pullets and eight to ten roosters, whose job was to fertilize the eggs. The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot, and was replaced.

That took an awful lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distrance, which rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

The farmers favorite rooster was old Butch, and a very fine specimen he was, too. But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all! John went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets, bell-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. BUT.... to Farmer John's amazement, Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of Butch, he entered him in the county fair. Butch became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result: the judges not only awarded Butch the "No Bell Piece Prize" but they also awarded him the "Pulletsurprise" as well.

Clearly Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hope you are all having a wonderful Thursday!

2006-08-08T15:25:00.000-04:00

heat weary..........

Yes, I'm still here spanning the blog world to read in the few available minutes between orders and phone calls. It's nice to have a computer to play with while I wait in those in-between moments. You'd think I might write, or keep updated more since I have the apparatus and time that allows me to..... but to be honest, I haven't been able to finish any posts I've already archived. I find myself spending the quiet afternoons surfing in and out of the web, and next thing you know, it's 5 PM. Some things are written, but I suffer the affliction of not knowing how to end them... so they are archived, to be edited again and again before I find the magic words: The End.

The heat is playing a major role in my apathetic conduct, and that bothers me most of all. I was once very capable of putting Martha Stewart to shame with my organizational and "done today" attitude. I cold wiz things off a list faster than I could actually think them. These days that list is short or nonexistent. It's far too hot to even care most days. Perhaps it's because I really need that long awaited vacation to loosen the grips of procrastination... to get away from work and phones. Yup, that's it...... I need to decompress....... find a way to rejuvenate.

How nice it would be to find myself by the ocean.... sipping tall iced teas, and nose deep into a book. While cool ocean breezes wash sunshine all over me, I listen to the echoes of sea gulls after a good catch. Glimpses across the water for oncoming boats or dolphins would be my only real distraction, while the sun is allowed to set the day.

Well, that's enough vacation for me for one day. Hate to cut it off, but duty still calls, whether I am ready to come back or not. I have been around to read everyone's posts, which is still my favorite distraction of all, but haven't kept up with comments as well as I'd like. I will make a more concerted effort in that area.

Hope you all are having a peachy Tuesday!

2006-08-02T17:00:00.000-04:00

happy feet.......

There are some days when duty calls, and there is no hitting the snooze button to stall the summons. You must hit the door running, and it requires the most comfortable pair of shoes you own to see you through the day. Nothing seems to fit the bill more than a good pair of sneakers.... or as they call them in Atlanta, tennis shoes.
Since I am not a tennis player, and have a New England vocabulary still, I call them sneakers, or "sneaks" for short.

I am very lucky that I get to wear them everyday..... as no caterer is worth a darn in high heels. With as much running around that we do, and slippery kitchen floors to deal with, it's required footwear. When I get home around noonish to do paperwork, I can slip them right off and walk around barefoot; a perk when you have a home office. No matter how comfortable sneakers are, even by noon, your feet are weary of shoes altogether. Slipping off the confines of footwear lessens the barking your feet yell to your legs.

No amount of comfort has been afforded me this week when it comes to shoes. The amount of running around has increased due to a co-worker on vacation, and thankfully due back tomorrow. What started out as a slow and quiet week, actually ended up in a lot of last minute orders. Whoopie! Job security at it's finest. Yet, it takes a toll on the dogs, if you know what I mean. Perhaps it's time to go shoe shopping after all, as I hear switching off shoes throughout the day is the best thing you can do for your feet. Or maybe, I'm just getting foot- cranky in my old age. Naw..... I need to go shoe shopping!

It's not one of my favorite shopping sprees, and I'd rather go grocery shopping if I had my druthers, but we do need foot protection. Since I only own a total of five pairs of shoes, two pairs of dress oxfords, one pair of good sneakers, one pair of yard shoe sneakers, and flip flops, it's time to expand the wardrobe in that area. I actually did venture into a store a few weeks back and loitered through the shoe department. All of a sudden the world went from black and white to beautiful color as the loveliest pair of dress shoes stared back at me from the rack. They were perfect in every way, except they were brown, and I was looking for black shoes. The heel was just enough so that toppling over wouldn't be a problem, and they were even in my size. Best of all, the price was within my budget...just not my budget for that week. I left them on the rack.... not without trying them on first, and doing a little runway walk, of course.

I did buy a pair of new sneakers (Dr. Scholls), and have been spending my time breaking them in a little. New sneakers are nice, but they do require a few wears in order to tame them of their stiffness. Perhaps with this week being busy, it wasn't a good time to give them that test run. Regardless, I never remember that rule when I purchase new shoes. I'm only too happy to wear them immediately.... mostly because I've already over-worn the last pair. (Don't we all, though?)

It should only be a few more days before the sneakers are in comfortable mode, and I won't be running around as much as I have this week. There is light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak, and home chores can get some attention before the midnight hour. Thank goodness I can do the home stuff in bare feet..... my favorite attire of all. As hubby says: If your feet aren't comfortable, nothing's comfortable. And I'll be darned if he isn't right about that!

2006-07-27T20:37:00.000-04:00

it's whats for dinner.......

There was never a time in my life, when greeted by my Italian grandparents at their front door, when the first words out of their mouths weren't: "Are you hungry?" or, "Have you eaten?" Nothing was more important than your stomach functions.... never mind that the trip might have taken a few hours drive, and your kidneys needed more attention.... food was the dominant concern. And so began my love affair with food.

We always ate well, as there was no excuse not to. Grandma's theory of life was that you spent the first part of your paycheck on food, then paid the rent. Funny thing is, I worked for another Italian lady once who had the same theory... so I was convinced it was an Italian tradition. Grandma could cook! It was her main function in life..... well, besides watching her "stories" and knitting doilies.

Cooking lunch and dinner started as soon as dishes from breakfast were cleared and cleaned from the table at the early hour of 7 AM. No respectful marinara sauce was cooked less than a full eight to ten hours before serving.... and marinara sauce dominated every dinner meal. Even if they were serving a meat dish, a bowl of pasta was always the beginning entree on her table. That could be pretty tricky for guests, as a pasta would seem like the main entree, and many people would load up on that before realizing that they had only just begun to be served. My Dad made that mistake the first time he was invited to dinner, and helped himself to two full bowls of pasta.... only to be surprised that the roast beef hadn't been served yet. Being polite, he ate everything, which probably endeared him to my Grandmother, as it showed that he had a healthy appetite. Protests of being too full were not a good enough excuse for her. As a matter of fact, it was an insult not to load your plate and eat every bite.... sometimes twice.

We would spend our Thanksgivings at my Grandparents house, and every type of animal known to man would be represented on the table (well, it seemed that way, anyway). Of course there was the traditional turkey, but we might also have rabbit, chicken and roast beef.... not without the pasta dish first. Grandma made her own gnocchis. For those of you not familiar with this pasta, it is nothing like the commercial brand you see in grocery stores. Her gnocchis were heavy. (It wouldn't surprise me if anchors on ships have this little gem as a filling.) Don't get me wrong though.... they were delicious, but you could only eat 6 and call it a day. But as mentioned, this was only the beginning entree..... many meats were still to come out to the table, and for those of you with "bird quality" eating habits, you would be doomed if you hadn't fasted the week before. Needless to say, nobody (and I mean nobody) ever went home hungry. It was unheard of.

Christmas was spent at our home in Connecticut. Mom would prepare a grand feast of pecan pies, cookies, banana breads, and all the sides dishes for the main courses. Dads specialty was meats, seafood, and the beginning antipasta. Sometimes we would have lobster, baked stuffed shrimp, standing rib roast or capon; and always a pasta to start the entree courses. Mom almost never cooked lasagna, that I can recall.... but she was a wiz with manicotti. Everything was made from scratch, even the "pancakes" that were rolled with cheese, and baked in her own marinara sauce.

Her real specialty was baking. She made the best christmas cookies, and lots of them! She would hide batches of them, lest we eat them all up, as they also doubled as presents for neighbors. I make those same cookies still, and can tell you first hand how labor intensive they are..... rolled, cut and decorated ones take me hours for just one batch, yet she made dozens and dozens of the them while still keeping everything else in order. ( I have to send everybody out of the house so I can concentrate and keep up with the timing when I make them.) When I was old enough, she drafted my help, until "making the christmas cookies" became my task altogether. I was also given the banana bread recipe, while she maintained the pecan pies. After 35 years of baking, I no longer read the recipes, I know them by heart.

All dinners were required to be eaten at the diningroom table, with the food served family style in the center of the table. There was one rule my parents had that was enforced. You were allowed to take as much as you wanted (and there was always plenty), but you had to eat all you had taken. So the rule of "eyes bigger than your stomach" was learned fast. If you started off slow, you could always go back for seconds, but take too much the first time around, you might still be in front of your plate while everyone else was excused. And we had to be excused from the table.... there was no getting up when you were done, you had to wait for everybody else. Conversation was allowed, but no bickering or fighting. My parents strived for us to be civilized, and we were. This was why they could bring us to fancy restaurants even when we were very little. They tolerated no revolting from the ranks.... and we were very aware of the consequences if we stepped over the line.

You were also required to try everything at least once, even if it were a spoonful. Opinions could not be formed if you didn't try it. However, my Mom and I had an ongoing thing about peas. I hated them! She thought she could break me of my boycott by requiring me to take a spoonful everytime she served them, but never did. To this day, I still hate them, and pick them out of any dishes that are served with them. I have another food I was never fond of either: fried fish, especially if they came in the form of sticks. The frozen varieties that Mom bought for our meatless fridays (because we were Catholic) were awful, and I never had acquired a taste for them.... no matter how much ketchup was doused on them to get them down. I wasn't much of a fruit eater either, mostly berries of any kind, but loved melons.

My favorite meals always consisted of meats and potatoes, especially if the meat was cooked on the grill. Dad was KING in that area. He could man a mean grill to perfection. Our dinner at home didn't always include the pasta entree first, then on to the meat course. Mom simplified it to just one course.... but made a variety of different homecooked meals every night, a special mid-day dinner on Sunday after church. It was ritual and tradition that we were in our chairs, washed for dinner at the first sign that the food was done. No one really had to call us twice. We were good eaters! We also were all raised on milk as choice of drink. Since I hate sodas of all kinds, this was not a problem for me. I still drink glasses of milk with my dinner to this day, and am not in the least worried about osteoporosis.

My biggest weakness is, and always has been, sugar. I will take a cookie, cake or pie over any salty foods as a snack. And a big bowl of ice cream has served as many dinner entrees for me. Hey, my Mom told me that when I owned my own house, I could eat anything I wanted.... I'm just following her instructions.... nothing wrong with that is there? Ok, yes, I do love salads, vanilla yogurt with honey-nut cheerios, and a whole arrangement of healthy foods.... but sometimes I just crave a nice bowl of ice cream, with chocolate sauce. Preferably mint chip, but I will settle for fudge swirl if I have to.

Geez..... all this talk about food, and now I've talked myself right into a bowl of ice cream. Good thing my son knows how to drive, and inherited my sweet tooth. I can send him off to the store to get the required groceries while I finish this post. Ah... life is so good today!

2006-07-25T14:06:00.000-04:00

a delicate balancing act.....

Some days we have to choose between being the bee or being the cat... and some days it chooses us. Without any real consultation or
awareness involved, we might find ourselves walking a fine tightrope of balancing many tasks in order to make it through the day accomplished. Many times things on our list were never there to begin with, they were added as the day grew longer. Yet we manage to find ways to complete the tasks, because so much depends on those chores we were never aware of.

If we are the cat, the tasks are minimal. Other than the million naps we can take, or patiently waiting for some small critter to make the mistake of crossing our path, we can live a pretty peaceful existence... as long as our owners treat us well. Everything else we do would be considered "all in a days work"..... because cats hold no real job other than fluff and purring. Yes, the owners depend on us to keep their house rid of pesky mice and bugs, and we do run the risk of being dive-bombed in the behind by getting too close to a birds nest in the trees; but for the most part, cat naps are our forte' in life.

If we are the bee, much depends on our abilities to pollinate the species of flowers that grow across the land. We are busy making sure the earth has color, as well as utilizing the nectar from those flowers for food. Not only do we produce honey, but we seek to feed our tribes as well. It has been estimated that one third of the human supply of food is dependent on the pollination that bees accomplish. Therefore, the saying "busy as a bee" has true magnitude because of this.

So as a human, I had the chance to be both sides of the equasion this past week. When I deemed it necessary to be the cat, and enjoy those cat naps I sooooo love, I became the cat.
Lets face it.... it has been hot this past week, and with our commercial kitchen without any air conditioning, temperatures spiked into the likes of hellfire. After making sure I was the bee, and got the food to the required destinations, I came home and crashed. I was wiped of any spare energy to do menial tasks around the office, and saved much of that work for when the sun went down. Then I became a different animal altogether: the owl. Nocturnal abilities are abundant when a good siesta was allowed, and I am so good at this ability. Always keeping one ear perked for the phone to ring, I settled into the depths of my couch and snoozed. If not, I could have been very cranky.... and I'm just not very nice when I'm cranky.

So my lack of posting or making it around to comments didn't mean that I'd dropped off the face of the earth... I was otherwise occupied by rest I could afford myself for being one of the bosses of my company..... and I soooo deserved it. Much work was still accomplished, only at stranger hours than usual. It's a balancing act I've learned to perfect at my nearing age of "ancient". Of course, I'm in big trouble if I ever get a real job that requires me to be alert for a straight 8 hour shift..... but I won't think about that now, it's siesta time!

2006-07-21T18:20:00.000-04:00

just a wee bit preoccupied lately.....

I would have posted more this week, but as you can see, I am out looking for a new brain. The old gal ain't like she used to be... but lucky for me, I found a place that can fill my request. I just have to be careful that I don't pick the one that says AB Normal. I love the fact that I can also buy a few donuts at the corner store while I'm there. Hope they sell chocolate ones.

See you all next week.... with a brand spanking new brain! Have a wonderful weekend... and pray for rain to slosh us somewhere during that time. We sure could use a good belly-gusher in these parts.

2006-07-18T16:18:00.000-04:00

if only it were this easy.......

You can hardly turn on a newscast lately without finding out more than your share of skirmishes that lead to rocket fire, and eventually to recorded deaths. It seems the world has gone mad. The Middle East maddest of all, lately. All the while, the collected heads of other "states" ponder over what must be done to stop this nonsense.... to somehow return to rational thinking, diplomacy.... or whatever other tactic will appease each side. Where are the Super Heros when you need them?

Well, this is nothing new. Every generation behind us thought the same about their times.... and for good reason. It's been a proven fact that man cannot get along with his own species very well. Call it territorial or call it the nature of the beast, we've gone out of our way to bring the act of conquering to a fine art. It probably started out during the cave days when man was first learning to walk upright. His brain, just larger enough and capable of thought process, had the caveman just humming about while spotting a nicer or newer cave. Hence the first neighbor against neighbor skirmish. He who has the better cave has a better chance of survival, yes? And on it went to bigger and better things, such as food and clothing. It escalated from there to land beyond that of known territory, and now we have events that throw God , as a pariah, into the mixture..... adding fuel to an unnecessary fire. What's different about these times is that we watch it unfold before us everyday, all day, even if it doesn't affect us personally. The bombs are more sophisticated and better built. Heck, in most cases you don't even have to show up at the battlefield, just aim and point from whatever distance away you are. It's bound to do destruction, and cause death.

It's not the end of times, I don't believe, but it sure feels like it somedays, doesn't it? Between the weather being as screwy as it is, bombings across the continents on innocent cities by terrorists, and the general hopelessness we feel over the leaders we entrusted to take care of these problems, it's difficult to see any hope out of the situation. But there is hope. Remember..... it was the last gift out of Pandoras box after all the other ills were released into the world. At this point, it is all we have as a coping mechanism.

The world is not full of Super Heros to dig us out of this mess, but enough smaller heros make a difference here and there. What we really need is an understanding amongst the kooks and mongers out there that life is more precious, because it was a gift of God.... whomever they perceived Him to be. We should survive as a species because we have the best abilities of any animal that has walked the face of the earth so far. We were put here to do good things. There has to be more of a reason, other than to destroy ourselves, why we exist at all. And a few people do realize this concept, except they are out-numbered by ones who apathetically stand by or actively work against it. Remember that it is nowhere written that the species of man can go on forever, but it is something we can have a hand in taking care of now. If only it were easy enough for us to leave it up to the Super Heros..... but it's not.

2006-07-13T17:50:00.000-04:00

monsters inc......

If you can remember back to when you were a kid, you can probably conjure up the image of yourself checking under the bed at night... or the closet. After all, that's where the monsters hid. Somewhere along the line, we all out-grow that little ritual, and get on with the business of growing up. We're pretty sure the "monsters" have exited the building, as there were new places to go, people to see, and things to do. And we run smack dab into life, where we discover there are worse monsters out there. Ones our parents tried to warn us about, but we were too smart to listen.... and ones we never saw coming at all. Ones that make us want to cuddle up on that very same bed we were afraid of so long ago.....but we're grown-ups now, so the very idea of taking to bed is inconceivable. Whether we like it or not, we must face the day with some type of bravado and carry on. Brave little soldiers, and all that.

But it has increasingly gotten harder and harder to do with all we hear and see. The state of the world is in a fine mess right now, and what's worse, it's a man made mess. No monsters like the fuzzies under our childhood beds, mind you, these scary ones look like us... and it's enough to make you horrified of the possibilities. We, the "thinking animal" have been capable of far surpassing the learning curve of basic needs; beyond that of communication, shelter and food. We have the ability to produce and study medicine, build bridges, and grow produce. No other animal in the world can do those things. So with all those abilities, all those great minds pregnant with ideas and ideals, how do we manage to find ourself in the quandary we are in now?

We hear of all the bombings around the world; carefully calculated, and executed by men who have a hatred in their belly so fierce for their enemy, that taking out innocent people who are just minding their own business get caught in...... all over a difference of opinions that can't seem to be solved diplomatically. In our leadership around the world, it appears that everybody is right in how they run their country, and everybody else is wrong. Instead of being able to solve the differences, we resort to threats and sanctions and eventually move to weapons and bombs. It's a simple jump from there to war and terrorism, and monsters you could never have dreamed of.

If you have ever seen the show "The Wonder Years", you would get an idea of what it was like to grow up during the late 1960's and early 1970's. Our parents had the worries of the world on their shoulders then. They were sending their sons off to a "conflict" in a foreign land, and worried that communism would spread. Missles were being tested, rockets fired, and now there were two super powers who had the formula for the bomb.... capable of blowing up the world 15 times over. (Like once wouldn't be enough, huh?) There was a stand-off between Communist Russia and The United States, and bomb shelters were easy thoughts because of the threat that was always prevalent. Yes, I do remember the "stop, drop, and cover", because it was taught to me in Kindergarten, in the early 1960's.

By April of 1975, our parents could breathe a sigh of relief, because the conflict known as Vietnam was officially over. As a nation, we watched as the last remnants of war scurried to leave a fallen Saigon. It was over, and our generation of fresh 18-year olds ready to conquer the world, would never have to worry about war again. Yeah, we had that brief stint in the Gulf for a few months in the early 1990's, but it was over in a flash. Not so with our current predicament. 9/11 has changed all that. Never in our wildest dreams could we have imagined anyone calculating such a scheme as to fly our own airplanes into buildings. It was horrifying to watch and gulp down the possibility that there was an enemy out there who actually wanted to do that much harm to innocent people..... someone who hated us and our lifestyle that much. This time we skimmed right over the sanctions halt, and slid right into war. It wasn't enough we had to hunt down the man responsible, we had to go after the nasty dictator we weren't finished with from the first Gulf War. And as Americans, many bought into the idea, because we were told it was a necessary function. In all the years from the first Gulf War to the second, this nasty dictator had had time to build up weapons of mass destruction, there was no way we could feel safe in the world knowing that this mad-man could be on the loose. Besides, he was sitting on a gold-mine of oil. It seemed conceivable, but then the plot thickened. No WMD's were found, and the reasons and excuses for war with Iraq changed to fit the mood of the moment. I just knew that was coming, didn't you?

As far as attacks due to terrorism, they've never stopped. It's not just the US who has become the target, it's happening in different cities around the world. We may not connect them all together, because they happen at random times and in random years, but it's all part of the same war. What's worsened the situation is that we aren't fighting a defined country, only an enemy that has infiltrated our cultures to locate and list "soft targets" for the next occurrence. It's making everybody just a wee bit nervous as we travel about our daily routines.
Part of us wants to hide our heads to the hate and destruction, as it's more than we can bear.... yet we can't. This is not a problem that will go away easily because every nation involved has their own reasons for being more right than the next guy. Diplomacy only seems to be going so far, and the attacks on soft targets are becoming images of revenge. Sadly, It's become our way of life now.

When will everyone just realize that terrorism is the lowest common denominator in the dictate of life, and that if you blow everybody up, you lose the very population you were trying to govern? With the bigger questions to deal with (like global warming, un-natural disasters, and how to handle our resource issues), why is it so important that we waste our time on the silly people who come along to destroy what we have already fixed? Why? Because whether we like it or not, we really don't know who the enemy is exactly. They could be living in any country as a sleeper-cell, and all you have to be doing is going about your life when, WHAM, it's shattered by an ideal born out of hate. It's not like you were knowingly walking into enemy territory, as there are no real borders.

It's sad, it's despicable, it's the complete reversal of everything we learned.... yet it's a real fact of life we have to deal with. These were not monsters our parents could warn us about..... but, sadly, it will be the monsters we warn our own children about.

2006-07-11T18:50:00.000-04:00

the money trap.........

With the cost of gas raising on a moment to moment basis, and the cost of utilities following fast in the same footsteps, I wonder how the generation behind us will survive in today's economy. Even making minimum wage pay (which is five times higher from when I first started working in the late 1970's) is not enough to sustain the basic necessities, and it gets harder and harder to become creative in finances.

We were all taught to put money away for a rainy day..... you know, the day that misfortune slams you out of nowhere, and it's essential that you have to take that carefully calculated bank account and tap it for necessary funds that will easily see you out of trouble. Ha! Is there really such a thing? Only with the Robbing Peter To Pay Paul Bank is it possible (at all) for me.... and I know I've raised it to a high art form. It wasn't easy, and took years of practice; but like a bike, once mastered, always learned. I'm also fortunate to have been born with the bargain gene, so any roller-coaster rides are like a swing at the playground. Sometimes I get pushed a little too high for my liking, but I always manage to find ground zero no matter what.

So all this thinking about money and survival made me wonder what the state of affairs are like on a larger scale.... beyond the scope of my own tribulations. How do the people of countries around the world survive their financial woes? I let my fingers do the google dance . Beyond all the statistics, I managed to boil down a few facts that came through loud and clear. It seems that countries that allow their commerce and economy to grow, spend somewhat less on defense, and more on the common citizen in education, have communities that thrive.

A shining example of this, is the difference between North and South Korea. Communist North Korea censors their television and news, and all reports come from state-run agencies. (Insert Big Brother here.) During the mid to late 1990's, the economy took a significant turn for the worse, and people were starving to death due to famine; numbers reaching up into the 600,000's With the fall of Communist Russia, much aid was cut off, and many citizens were defecting across the border to China in search for food. Foreign aid arrived by 1999, and although it helped to reduce the high number of deaths due to famine, North Korea continued on their nuclear program, which pretty much sucked out the funds to help a starving nation. It was reported in 2005 that the World Food Program could see imminent danger of conditions returning to the same numbers of the decade before, but the government was reported to have mobilized millions of city-dwellers to help out the rice farmers. However, we now sit on a tightrope of diplomacy over the missile issue.... but that's a story for another day.

Democratic South Koreans may be oppressed by their leaders to some extent, ( aren't we all to some degree??) but not nearly like North Korea. Since their 1987 free elections, South Korea, has become the 10th largest economy of the world; having the 2nd highest number of broadband connections per capita in the world. They have become leaders in computer games, digital displays and mobile phones, while still maintaining their traditions in cuisine and ancestral worship. In a word, they have flourished. Yes, they did receive our aid during the 1950's, but they sunk their money into commerce and the nation has grown into an international competitive country.

What about other countries? Well, the wealthiest ones still provide aid in the form of money, supplies, or volunteers.... the US being the leader in that area. That money could be well spent on it's own citizens, yet governments spend millions in aid to foreign countries. But how do they know the needed supplies are getting to the population? We don't necessarily.... but by the looks of repressed societies, and absent or low economies, we can get a hint that all is not well in their neck of the woods.... especially if the citizens are suffering. Least wealthy countries have a hard time maintaining on their own, nevermind when a natural disaster happens.... and that's where "special aid" comes into the picture.

It breaks our hearts when we hear of tsunami's and earthquakes that wipe out whole villages and towns. We jump on the bandwagon of "drives for money" to show our support in order to build back some normalcy to the shattered lives of the survivors. Private citizens also donate millions on their own. After all, this is a true immediate emergency, and our hearts bleed at the visuals we see of the destruction. As one of the wealthiest nations in the world, the United States is still the leader when it comes to aid.... donated or not. Personally I am proud of that statistic, but at the same time cynical. That always has me questioning if the money is making it to the right areas or not. In many cases money was circumvented through the channels enough that the real citizens in need only received crumbs, while the military and government officials made out like fat rats in a cheese factory. Sadly, many African countries are guilty of that.

So it's not like we aren't giving enough, it's more like it's being wasted by societies that repress their citizens. Be it either by countries building up their nuclear programs, while starving their citizens, or giving the aid to incompetent officials who have corrupt governments, the proof is in the pudding when you see societies of people that are held back from flourishing. The aid they receive should help them well on their way, if the government they have had allowed it to happen.

Our government collects our taxes, and it works better for everybody if we all have a steady job to collect those taxes from. We also have disability benefits for a plethora of reasons for those who can no longer work. So our government not only gives to other countries, it also gives at home. It can be said of the train-wreck of Katrina, that we didn't give enough... the government should have given more. Well they kind of did, believe it or not. It was so mismanaged by incompetents on our own side that the aid once more slide out crumbs while being tangled in the mire of bureaucracy. Then there were the reports of the $2,000 check issued to recipients who spent it at the Walmart for TV's or X-Box games. That didn't sit too well with a lot of us.... but then, mismanagement issues were also the reason for that. So giving was not the problem. Granted, a check for $2,000 is certainly not enough to start over a life, but if you lived in Africa, you'd be grateful.... and if you were totally wiped out, $2,000 duty free is better than no dollars.

So I thank my lucky stars everyday that I live in a country where re-inventing myself is a matter of mind over defeat, and not a death sentence because I have a government that will repress that life away from me. I may have to pay some exorbitant prices for gas and utilities, groceries and clothes.... but at least I have the means, ability, and freedom to live in a society that offers choices. Sure, I'm not a happy camper when it comes time to make those quarterly tax payments... and a little trip to Peter and Paul Bank is humbling, but I still live in a country where I can own my own money pit, and hope the best for the generation behind me. With all its sham and drudgery, we at least live in a society that promotes commerce, and education..... a lot of poorer countries have neither, and it does make all the difference.

2006-07-06T13:45:00.000-04:00

operation endurance......

A little over fifty-eight years ago, in June of 1948, a military action far past the ideas of what the military is thought to do, was born. It is officially known as the Berlin Airlift. It was to be a shining moment during a time when everyone was recovering from World War II, and one that every person who was involved with it, became a hero for. And with good reason... it was helping to save the lives of a city still torn by the effects of war.

Berlin layed over 100 miles into the portion of Germany that was occupied by Russian control, after the country was divided up into four major sectors. The United States, Great Britain, France, and Soviet Russia were each responsible for the administration of their own sectors; similarly, Berlin was also divided by four. Not happy that he wasn't going to receive reparations he felt his country deserved, Stalin (from Russia) elected to convert his sectors into Communist Dictatorships. This included the section of Berlin that was also under his control. While the Communist rule was enforced, it was obvious that the the democratic rule of the western sectors was beginning to flourish and rebuild. Attempting to gain control over the city of Berlin, the Soviets began to blockade and shut down all means of transportation into the city. To further show their dominance, it was announced that Russian sectors would not provide supplies to the sectors of the city that were under Western administration. It would mean that the people of West Berlin would starve to death. Within ten days of this final blockade, the United States and Great Britain decided to mount an airlift program, and flights into Berlin began to bring the much needed supplies these people needed.

It wasn't an easy job, in fact, it was one of great heroism and dedication. There were only three flight paths that the planes could use to get into the city, as all other airspace was Soviet ruled.
Add to the problem the treacherous fog that had to be overcome in many instances. If a transport plane flew too far off the flight pattern, they could be in danger of being shot down by a Soviet plane; indeed, flying blindly also put them at risk for crashing into the remnants of bombed out buildings that still remained. Needless to say, it was not a job for the weak of heart.

In August of 1948, just a few weeks after Operation Vittles began, Lt. Gail Halverson, a C-54 pilot, came up with an idea of dropping tiny bundles of candy, chewing gum, and other goodies to the crowds of children who would line up at the end of the runway and outside the gates of Tempelhof Airport. It was a gesture he had taken upon himself, fearful that he could possibly get court-martialed for his actions. Because it became so popular, and gave the Air Force a good name, he was allowed to continue his Operation "Little" Vittles. (One boy, too small to grab a parachute of goodies for himself even wrote to the Colonel, making a map of his home, so that when the plane came overhead, the boy could be ready. ) The children were told that they would know the "special plane" because the lieutenant would wiggle his wings. Lt. Halvorson would become known as "Uncle Wiggle Wings", and the "candy bomber" to the children of the city who waited with anticipation at the end of the airport runway where a cemetery was located. It became a ray of hope for many children who were much to young to know the full scope of war, as well as adults who were trying to rebuild a very damaged city and get on with their lives.

The airlift was a round the clock operation, trying to maintain a constant flow of essential commodities into the city. In trying to prepare for the winter, a newly developed Ground Controlled Approach Radar system was shipped to Europe to be installed at the airport. With the installation of this new system, controllers at the airport were able to give some insurance to the pilots flying in. It did not, however solve problems of icing the planes received while flying in the clouds. There were crashes, and a total of 31 Americans and 39 RAF flyers and workers on the ground did lose their lives. The numbers of lives they saved still remains priceless to this day, as the German people never forgot the kindness of a people they were at war with just a few years earlier. They would receive almost 2.5 million tons of essential goods. The Soviets would end their blockade in May 1949, but the operation would continue till August of that year. Fearful that the Soviets would re-blockade, the United States wanted to be sure the city of Berlin was on its feet a little bit better before stopping airlifts altogether.

I knew a lady who lived in Berlin during those times. She was raising two small children; another one on the way a few years later. The struggle she faced everyday was a constant threat. She was fearful of her children playing in bombed out buildings, weakened by the effects of war, and she was fearful that her children would never have enough to eat. She even resorted to "stealing a ham" once. When I asked her what she meant by "stealing", she proceeded to tell me that actually a friend of hers had stolen it, and given it to her. Afraid that it would be confiscated, she hid it under her coat and pretended to be pregnant while riding the train home from her friends home. There would be real food on the table that night for dinner. In August 1957, she immigrated to America with her husband, and now, three children. On the 20th, they landed at Ellis Island, and into a new life in a foreign country. She would learn to speak English through television, and had a habit of watching gangster movies of the time, emulating some of their vocabulary. My favorite was when she referred to taking a walk as "taking a powder". I used to lovingly call her "Mutti"... the German version of "Mother", and I used to love hearing the stories she would tell me of the time when she lived in Germany. She would even illustrate each one with a picture she pulled out of a special box that contained family photos of times when she was a young woman in the 1940's. My favorite ones included the Berlin Airlift. One cannot know desperation unless you truly face it head on, and she certainly had her trials in that area. She would lose her oldest son to a car crash when he was 18, and her husband succumbed to a heart attack while on one of his daily walks. Hers is a life that had seen many things, including her share of tragedy.... yet her stories of the airlift brought a sparkle to her pretty blue eyes, and I could tell that she was a survivor of the highest caliber for all that she had endured.

Everytime I think things are too tough to endure for myself, I think back to this courageous lady who braved the reconstruction of her bombed-out city in order to find some means of survival. The lessons I took away are immeasurable, but the sum of it was always: one has to do what one has to do in order to survive. It's not an easy balancing act, as it is a long and winding road.....but no matter, what's the alternative otherwise? If you can do what you need to do without sacrificing your soul at the end of the day, you are further up the ladder of personal success than most of the population of the world. It's the silver lining of the cloud we call life. It's a measurable feature we possess as humans, and making it through the curve-ball times certainly earns us a gold medal for Endurance.

2006-07-05T15:40:00.000-04:00

odd occurrences.....

A few weeks ago I happened to notice a little bird just sitting in the middle of the road at the end of my driveway. That seemed a little odd, but not quite out of the ordinary. Thinking I could shoo it off a bit, as people race around the curve in front of my house, I stepped closer, albeit slowly so as not to startle the little swallow.... but got so close I could touch it. It never budged an inch. Now that was odd!

Still a little worried that the bird would become part of the pavement, I looked around for a stick and small platform of sorts, in order to transport it manually. Successful in my attempts for props, I walked back to the little guy and tried to prompt him onto the makeshift platform. I gently poked his butt a few times, and still the bird did not move. Perhaps a broken leg? After my third attempt, the bird finally managed to fly "torso level" onto a neighbors yard, where he proceeded to sit the afternoon away. Birds don't usually "sit" on lawns, but who am I to question their methods of kicking back? Feeling like I had done a good deed by getting him out of the street, I talked it over with hubby, who mentioned that he was glad I didn't touch it. West Nile Virus and the Bird Flu became a topic of discussion over dinner.... and then I forgot all about the incident.

Last week, while making inspections of the five birdbaths in my yard, I noticed a robin sitting in a front yard bath, shivering. I'm used to them frolicking about and flapping around, but never just sitting in the water of the birdbath. Once again, this bird would let me get very close (without budging), and this time I figured it relatively safe to leave her alone. Forgetting the events and going about my daily chores, I thought no more about this bird either.... until the next morning on my way out the door. Glancing over at the bath, I noticed the robin keeled over....no doubt this bird would never fly again. A little shaken, and sick to my stomach over the dead carcass, I made a phone call to hubby to tell him of a chore I had in store for him. (It is written somewhere in our marriage vows that he has total chore-domain over yard carcasses.... I made sure of it, and remind him everytime one surfaces.) Bringing out the shovel to ready his tools for the job of sending this poor little soul off to the backyard ivy graveyard, we once again discussed the odd happenings of critters in and around my yard.

I'd probably drop the whole subject all together except for the fact that I've been having some strange occurrences with birds lately. On one of my deliveries in a town north of me, I noticed an odd looking bird trying to cross the road on foot. Not being able to actually identify what type of bird it was.... only that it was big, black and had a funny neck; hubby thought it might be a buzzard. Well.... still not sure as it really didn't look like any buzzard I'd seen, it made a little sense.... but why was it crossing the road on foot? Don't they fly? Maybe it was a wild turkey, as we still do have some around here, but I passed it too quickly to get a detailed look at it's features. Again, I dropped the subject, until I backed out of my driveway this past weekend and there was a man walking his dog..... and a very large parrot the size of a Macaw. What is it with birds lately that they want to walk? Did they forget they are actual prey to all the cats who roam in search of easy fodder? Walking seems like they are making it a little too easy for the kitties who troll the neighborhood, doesn't it? Or am I just being paranoid myself?

Ever since Miss Kitty moved down to Florida the yard has been filled with critters that never dared show themselves, let alone walk around. She was the Queen of Hunters, and never allowed my yard to get so over-run with rodents, reptiles and fowl. Now finding a chipmunk burrowing the ground for food, or a stray snake in search of a mid-day jaunt, is not uncommon. Birds from all over flock to the filled feeders and baths in my yard. It's not unusual to see the squirrels squabble with the cardinals, doves, and black birds over the dropped seeds from the messy little eaters that pick over the seeds at the feeders..... dropping the leftovers to the ground. With a fresh coat of pine straw on the ground in areas where I don't bother to grow grass anymore, new pock marks appear, which means a new job for me to straighten it all up again. If Miss Kitty were around, the noise level, pock marks, random snakes, paranoid squirrels and chipmunks would think twice before their venture into the gardens.

As it is, we joke amongst ourselves everytime the feeders are filled, and announce to all critters that the "buffet is open", and step back as the animals peek through the ivy to see for themselves. I've found it's true.... the smell of food will turn anyone's nose in it's direction, and it doesn't take long for all creatures to figure it out either. Perhaps that's part of the problem. Maybe I feed them TOO much. You should see some of the super-sized critters that drop into the gardens. I've noticed this same phenomenon with dumpsters near McDonalds..... all critters who sanction them are well fed and robust. How can they not be with all that food available?

Somehow I can deal with all the squirrels and birds.... it's the reptiles and rodents that frighten the stuffing out of me. I hate snakes and rats.... it's no secret to anybody who knows me. I don't see a lot of them (which is a good thing), but occasionally run across one from time to time. It's the reason I will not go outside barefoot. One reptile was sighted by hubby this weekend, who promptly managed to smack it in the kisser with the edger, not realizing it was a snake at first; this called for another trip to the ivy graveyard. Snakes look so much like twigs, it's hard to tell them apart sometimes, so weeding sticks and twigs from the lawn is a careful operation. The rats and mice seem to thrive in the ivy.... also making good food for the snakes, I guess. The population is still at bay somewhat, as another kitty in the neighborhood makes a foray into the gardens from time to time.... let's face it, my gardens are kind of a "buffet" for her too.

It's the sick or injured birds that have me a little spooked. Granted, they could have been incapacitated by legitimate means... but all this talk of bird flu makes you wonder, doesn't it?

2006-07-03T11:00:00.000-04:00

let the fireworks begin.... a happy and safe 4th of July to all!

2006-06-29T16:30:00.000-04:00

a garden party.....

So what to do when you can't type the day away on your computer? Why throw a party of course! Makes perfect sense, doesn't it? And that's exactly what I did for the last few days. My distinguished guests included: Mr. Pine Sol, Ms. Windex, Lord Furniture Polish, Lady Bathroom Scrubber, Master Toilet Bowl Cleaner, and Mr. & Ms. Vacuum. We had a hell of a time!

We partied the days away in absolute bliss hitting every room in our path. It was a non-stop fest that had no boundaries, except when I ran out of food. Leaving my guests behind for a few hours, a trip to the local grocery store (my favorite kind of shopping) yielded new goodies to store in the cupboards. There was even time to bake a few banana chocolate chip breads in the few moments of down time. Lucky for me, the guests were pooped and needed a few snooze moments for themselves, otherwise the breads would have sat as batter in my refrigerator.
Nothing was too sacred or off limits in our attempt to boogie down.... except for the discovery of the Dustbunnies that tried to crash the party. They were promptly sucked out by the vacuums. Those trouble-making-partying Dustbunnies.... will they never learn??

I generally throw this party in early Spring... around April or so, but was late with the invitations. No matter, it worked out best for everyone to come in late June anyway. Ms. Windex brought a guest with her, a Prince Paper Towel.... and what a handsome man he was! So debonair in his all-white suit, only to have the Dustbunnies ruin it on their way out. It was such a shame.... we literally had to throw it away.

In all, the party lasted 3 days.... we just couldn't seem to part after Tuesday, and all guests decided to stay one more day. What the heck..... I only see them all together like that once a month. I see them all the time individually, as we set little play-dates with one another.... but all together is a rarity these days. Needless to say, I was glad to have a little more time with them. They were all great and wonderful guests, and they even left the house cleaner then when they first arrived.... the best guest of all!

So now all caught up, computer restored, and printer running, it's time to stick to the appointment I made with Mr. Catering Office.... and perhaps get in a nice nap in later since the phones aren't ringing anyway.... ZZZZZZZZZZZ

2006-06-26T21:08:00.000-04:00

absence........

Sneaking onto my sons computer is a covert act that must be done when he is off to work.... like tonight. Why am I sneaking around his room? Well, with good reason. My computer suffered another crash. Seems like every couple of months or so, I go through this. This time it was a matter of my PC not recognizing my printer.... or even another printer that I had installed. The "spooler" application was disabled. What the heck is a spooler? I don't know... I only know that I need it in order for the printer to work. Having an opportunity to talk it all over with a tech who is a good friend, she advised me that I would need to bring it in to get fixed, as we tried to send the computer back in time, but to no avail.
So, no spooler application, no printer, no way to type up invoices... and worse of all, no PC .

I (hopefully) will get back to normal by Wednesday.... in the meantime, my house got a good cleaning today... as there was not much else to do, and it's raining again, so the plants and grass are happy. Life could be worse! I'll be around to read and leave comments as I can.... but remember, this is a covert action on my part. If my son ever knew I was on his computer, he'd freak. shhhh.......

2006-06-24T08:25:00.000-04:00

and on the 30th day, the skies relented.......

To all those that performed the traditional and not so traditional raindance in my plight for something to drop from the sky..... I would like to thank you. It finally rained last night for about an hour.... just enough to salvage my browning areas of lawn from total destruction. I might even have the chance to mow down the crab-grass that thrived during this time, it being the only type of grass not affected by our drought.

I had managed to water (on the lam again) the flowers and bushes by watering can and plant food Thursday night, and everything seemed to perk up a bit.... but it could be only a matter of one day that could bring it all back down again. Then last night thunderstorms moved into the area, the skies rocked, and trees swayed in anticipation of any precipitation they might receive. They were all rewarded highly for their patience. We didn't have a belly-gusher, but a nice shower that was able to sink into the hard clay ground, and not run off into the streets. It even managed to drop the temperatures outside to a nice comfortable 78 degrees from the high 90's. Yup, the rain Gods were mighty kind for leaving such a nice calling card. There are even rumors that we might see another performance tonight. To that I say: Bring It On.... just wait till after the 6 PM outdoor wedding ceremony I have to coordinate.

My hydrangea and azalea bushes, flowers, and lawn thank you for your prayers of rain..... and they all wanted me to let you know this. Your efforts paid off, and the flora is smiling once more!

Have a wonderful weekend!

2006-06-22T15:15:00.000-04:00

it's how you look at it.....

That's the funny thing about perspectives, everyone has their own, and they're as common as opinions. Gaze at any life canvas long enough, and you are bound to find a image that not everybody else can see. What we forget, most of the time, is that there is a bigger picture involved as well. We are too intent, more times than not, on being gratified with the little amount we do understand, and dismiss that which takes a more open mind for. In a lot of cases we get tangled in the "entitlement" phase and the perception perceived by others is not always flattering. With good reason..... nobody likes a truly rude person.

I had the opportunity to read a few posts from blogsphere that touched on the subject of perspectives. One concerned a story of a waiter and hostess talking at a host stand. In walks a woman with her husband, demanding a table by the window. When told that all tables were reserved except for an aisle seat, the woman huffed, called the situation "hideous" and stomped out of the restaurant. Concerned that the hostess would be upset over the situation (as this was her first day), the waiter expressed condolences. This girl was ready though. She proceeded to tell the waiter about her 22-year old sister that just returned from Iraq. She said her sister wouldn't care what table she ate at, she was just happy to be home, as was all of her family. And BAM.... it put the whole situation into perspective.

Another story was about a man who moved into an affluent area. His neighbors, seeing a middle-aged man who rides a Harley, keep a guarded attitude in their manner toward him. What they didn't know was that this new neighbor was to keep guard on the neighborhood, while his neighbors go to work everyday. Sort of a self-applied and appointed position, he is a hero for doing this. Did his neighbors bother to find that out about him? No. They saw long hair, a motorcycle, and a motorcycle party, and passed their own judgment first. And BAM again! There was that perception fairy again.

It seemed to me that this was a good lesson in humility. It was a good time to take a peek into my past and see if I passed judgment on something without giving it the benefit of the doubt. Nope.... pretty ok here. I have to admit, I like being on the better side of karma than not. To me, it just doesn't make any sense to be outwardly rude to people, as the woman in the restaurant was. That attitude usually ends up in a very sour and miserable life.... and surely there's more to life than that. Standing up for your rights is a noble thing, but so are rules to keep you in line. If you follow the moral ones a little more closely, they are filled with social manners; the most important one is "getting along". It's what society does if they want to co-exist. That seems a pretty simple rule in itself, yet so difficult to obtain. And to be perfectly honest with you, there are some days I don't undertand why. What's so hard about "do good things".

We are lucky to be able to catch random acts of kindness glimpses here and there.... the world is not hopeless yet, but we don't see as many as we'd like. These images are projected forward as time passes through. What will recorded history say of us without truly getting to know us? Will they judge us on our wars and bad deeds? Or will they open their eyes to see the people who exist now? I suppose it depends on how you look at it. Well..... lets hope we are judged kindly by history by starting to remember what "do good things" implies.

2006-06-19T19:30:00.000-04:00

rainy days and mondays....

There is a saying in Atlanta that if you don't like the weather, wait five minutes because it will change. The exception to that is the summer.... and Atlanta summers usually start in June. We can easily go for many weeks with temperatures in the high 80's and 90's, with no rain to wash off the heat, or grace the flowers with a nice shower of water. As I gaze out the window this Monday night, I've been hoping for a nice belly-gusher to salvage the remnants of my once green grass. It seems that this, once again, was only a rumor.... rain seems to be in the forecast, but the overcast sky is not relinquishing any clemency.

Once again, I will have to play the "rotating the sprinkler" game with the lawn after 8PM, in hopes that the grass will respond to the little I can do for it in these hot times, without running my water bill up to exceed the national debt. City water is not cheap, my bill can run anywhere over $100.00 to $140.00 a month. Even the critters are sputtering and coughing in the yard in hopes of finding a free drop somewhere. No matter how much I fill up the bird baths (everyday), they are empty by the next night. It wouldn't be so bad if we could just water our lawns, but the state is under a water restriction siege. My county has taken the restriction further than the rest of the state by declaring that we can water freely between the hours of 8PM and 5AM, rotating every other day.... and no watering AT ALL on Fridays. If caught, you proceed into a series of fine schedules. The first offense is a warning. The second, a monetary fine you must pay to the city; and the third, your water is turned off at the street so that nothing gets into your home.

For a gardener, this is a nightmare... but I am fortunate that the neighbors are understanding. So far, no one has turned me in to the water company when I sneak around behind the bushes to water the beds that are filled with sagging and gasping flowers. Even the bushes are beginning to wane from their former glory, and the hydrangea bush I usually hide behind, managed to grab my arm the other day to beg for anything I could spare. Oh the pain I felt when I saw her long leaf arms sprouting big blue flowers laying flat to the ground in the dust. The once former grass that surrounded the bush was now nothing but Georgia red clay and pock marks, where squirrels and chipmunks had dug for any acorns that might have fallen off the giant oak tree in my backyard. What's truly sad is that the neighbors hydrangea bushes have net-worked with my own, and tugged further at my weak heart. There is no way I can bypass this beautiful purple flowered queen without leaving her a nice long drink of water.

So if you are experiencing an over-abundance of rain... feel free to wish it over to my little corner of the Earth for a day or two.... we could really use it here!

2006-06-16T18:00:00.000-04:00

in my fathers arms.....

Long ago and far away there lived a special man in my life, my Dad. He had all the enthusiam of a child when it came to exploring, and shared this adventure freely....it was a seed deeply planted in all of his children, and it was never lost on me. He had all the degrees of charm and wit, was a great story-teller, and loved making life fun. And one thing more.... he was very handsome, as he resembled the dancer, Gene Kelley.

I always thought the story of how my parents had met was one of kismet, and probably the most romantic love story I've ever heard. My Mother, returning from a visit on Cape Cod, was on the train headed toward Boston. Suffering a small heartache from a spurned crush, she was determined to wallow in silence, if only she could find a place to sit on the heavily crowded train. A seat by a young sailor was unoccupied, but his long legs were stretched out on it. When she politely asked him if she could have the seat for herself, the young man teased her, but would not budge. She promptly decided that any seat was better than no seat, and sat down on his legs. Pretty daring stuff for the 1950's... a lady just did not do that, but her will was stronger than the teasing she was receiving, and the young mans charm softened her heart. It was all in fun, and she was quickly over her unrequited crush as they struck up conversation.
As they parted in Boston, he asked to see her again. She gave her address, and invited him to dinner. Because she still lived at home, and her father was from the "old country", with very old fashioned ideas, she had her reservations; but the deed was done, and there was no backing out. She would wait till dinner was almost served before she was able to tell her parents of her invited guest, and hope for the best. The rest, as they say, is history.... and in 1952, my parents were married.

They would have four children, and we became the center of their lives. Being the only girl in the bunch allowed for some, but not many, special priviledges. While the boys had to learn yardwork, I had to learn housework.... all at a very young and age appropriate time. However, it wasn't all work, much of that learning included fun things to do as well. I remember one time in 1963 when my parents had planned a trip to Chicago. My two older brothers were going to be accompanying them, while my younger brother and I, (the "babies", even though I was 6) were in the care of relatives. They were excited because during their stay, they might have a chance to see President John Kennedy, as he was planning to be in Chicago on the same dates. Instead, President Kennedy cancelled his trip and flew to Dallas, Texas that November.

Dad loved airplanes, and even took up flying for a time. He took lessons, and often took me and/ or my brothers up with him. I was banned to go after a few times because I was too distracting, but do remember how much fun it was to look out the window. To this day, I'm still not afraid of heights.... but I have grown a fear of airplanes. The little ones don't bother me, it's the big ones that really do. But Dad loved them all. He once took my brothers out on a helicopter ride in Boston while we were visiting my Grandparents.... I had been shuffled off to do the" girly tea-party thing" with my Mom and Grandmother that day, but there was a TV at this house.... so it worked out good for me too.

Dad was always big on history.... it was the bane of existence. We were to explore everybody's home on the historical register of the state of Connecticut, and leave our names in their guest books..... and there were plenty. One membership to Mystic Village in Mystic, Connecticut allowed us in for free anytime we wanted, and it became a regular place to bring guests on our excursions. Needless to say, we went there a lot. But it never stopped there. Vacations included far away adventures from our norm of New England. In 1969 we took a trip to Montreal, Canada, to see "Man and His World", a leftover Worlds Fair from 1968. From there we traveled the Canadian province to Quebec, and then back down into the states via New Foundland. The next year, we went south to Gettysburg, Washington DC, and even as far as Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. All historical homes, battlefields and monuments bore our names in their guest registries. He even made some fun out of it at Gettysburg by buying relic bullets and hiding them around our campsite. After telling us to go on a scouting mission to find "civil war stuff", we came back with the last laugh, as we had found what we thought to be a cannonhole cover in the woods where he did not "plant" anything. I never did find out what it was we found, but I do remember that Dad was somewhat proud of our eagerness.

The marriage to my Mother lasted till she passed in 1978... and it was the first time I ever saw my father cry. He loved her more than anything, and with her passing, he was lost.
As a triple whammy, that very same time period carried the news that his sister and a fellow colleague had passed as well.... all this within a month. Feeling lonely (I'm sure), he started to see another woman who lived in the same town. Within a year, he had married her. It was the first of my step-mothers.... and she was a spiteful woman. Needless to say, we did not get along at all, but then she was not one that was easy to get along with, as my father divorced her in 1983. At this time, I broke away from New England and moved to Atlanta. Keeping in touch with Dad was now a very long distance endeavor, but we did. He would marry the second of my step-mothers in 1984, and this one would stick. She truly cared for my Dad.... all the way to the end, even enduring his dementia period. He passed in 1998.

What I remember most about my Dad, and my personal memory that didn't include any other family members, was that we would sit in his chair at night together when I was little. He would cuddle me up on his lap, and I would feel safe and secure that life was indeed good.....my daddy loved me, and I was his sweetie-pie; nothing could beat that. But that's just a little girls memory forever; it really never matters how old I grow, his arms around me remains my favorite reminiscence trip back. No longer able to do this for real, I realize how much I miss him, and how much it stings a little everytime Fathers Day rolls around. So very silently, I wish him a happy day, and in my mind I conjure up the image of the two of us sitting in his chair....protected in his arms.

To all fathers out there, a very Happy Fathers Day.

2006-06-13T11:50:00.000-04:00

oh look, it's pundit Barbie.......

One of the most fundamental rights we have as citizens in the United States is freedom of speech. If you say something good, bad or otherwise, you are protected by the first amendment to have the "right" to say it. It's probably the only part of the first amendment that most people can remember... a collective brain-sigh is what most people can recall about the rest of the amendment. What people forget about this right, is that it should be tempered with responsibility. Spouting slanderous hateful content is the first rule of kindergarten most of us learned not to do; we were taught to play nice! Not to mention the teachings of our parents: If you don't have anything nice to say, keep your mouth shut, for a foot could land in there.

Enter our pundit Barbie.... otherwise known as Ann Coulter. She professes her agenda as "conservative Christianity", but spews the most spiteful remarks against anyone within ear shot that does not believe as she does. Yup, she has the first amendment down alright, just not the temperament that softens the blows. On her personal list of hate, Democrats and Liberals take the most pot-shots, but then there are numerous other topics that receive her tongue-lashing as well. Add to the list: African-Americans, Muslims, the US government, swing-voters, The New York Times, John Kerry, women voters.... and the list goes on. It IS ok for her to press her right of free speech, although she lacks the ability to stick to the facts, and uses slander to garnish her views.

One of her more controversial and recent distasteful remarks:

"These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by griefparrizies. I have never seen people enjoying their husband's deaths so much." "And by the way,how do we know their husbands weren't planning to divorce these harpies? Now that their shelf life is dwindling, they'd better hurry up and appear in Playboy." ~~~said about four 9/11 widows who campaigned for John Kerry.

To lash out at the 9/11 widows, who witnessed their loved ones die, one cannot help but feel that this was said out of pure spite. Coulter's explanation: the 9/11 widows were part of the "lefts doctrine infallibility" and that they were using their grief "in order to make a political point while preventing anyone from responding." Whats' the matter, Ann.... are your book sales not doing so well that you need to resort to a vicious attack in order to stir up profits? This was a cheap shot, and nothing less. Or was that a belated backlash of what Paula Jones did?.... (whom Coulter was an unpaid legal advisor for.)

Some more slanderous quotes by the political pundit:

"We need somebody to put rat poisoning in Justice Stevens' creme brulee. That's just a joke, for you in the media."

I say, not funny... and certainly not a good joke at that. Once again, free speech, yes.... but rat poisoning??? Even the implication of such a deed would be considered terrorism these days! But lets not forget the little disclaimer to the media that she tacked on to the end of her statement....I guess that makes it ok to say, huh?

"We've finally given liberals a war against fundamentalism, and they don't want to fight it. They would, except it would put them on the same side as the United States."

"Whether they are defending the Soviet Union or bleating for Saddam Hussein, liberals are always against America. They are either traitors or idiots."

"We should invade their countries, kill their leaders, and convert them to Christianity."

These particular quotes remind me so much of the philosophy that the Bush administration has conned us into war over: Either you are for us or against us. What ever happened to the "right" to believe how we wanted to. Are we to be considered a traitor if we do not buy into this, or is it a theory that that gets lost in the mire of political positioning?

"My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not go to the New York Times Building."

When asked if she regretted making this statement, Coulter replied, "Of course I regret it. I should have added. 'after everyone had left the building except the editors and reporters.'"
Why do I see a trend of "terrorist" ideals here? Yet the terrorists she refers to are all "camel-jockeys", "jihad monkeys", "tent merchants", and "ragheads". I guess terrorists don't come in the form of leggy blonde Barbies.

"The swing voters-- I like to refer to them as the idiot voters because they don't have set philosophical principles. You're either a liberal or a conservative if you have an IQ above a toaster."

"It would be a much better country if women did not vote. That is simply a fact. In fact, in every presidential election since 1950--- except Goldwater in '64--- the Republican would have won, if only the men had voted."

As far as the country being better off by repealing the 19th amendment allowing women to vote, this becomes a deeper argument in Coulters personal battlefield. In June 2005, Coulter filed an inaccurate voter registration form in the state of Florida. Instead of using her own home address, documents indicate that she provided her real estates agents address. This is considered "voter fraud", and is a felony in the state of Florida. On March 29, 2006, the Palm Beach Post reported that election officials have given Coulter 30 days to explain the inaccuracy.
Hmmmmm.... maybe we should just take the vote away from likes of fraudulent voters as you.

Her presentations and publications have come under much controversy due to their bias, offensive and inflammatory nature. She is also accused by critics of hypocrisy, and willing to misrepresent facts in order for her to state her case. I'm still waiting to hear how she will explain away the two year difference in her DC drivers license from her Connecticut license. Perhaps she has taken a "poetic" license as to her birthdate?

So let's see...... A spiteful author, with an agenda for her personal beliefs; those who oppose her are "god-less" or "un-American". A controversial pundit who uses slander as her attack platform, but when questioned about her remarks, she refers her inquirers to her publications, side-stepping her snide remarks in order to promote her book sales. And it doesn't stop there.

"The ethic of conservation is the explicit abnegation of man's domination over the Earth. The lower species are here for our use. God said so: "Go forth, be fruitful, multiply, and rape the planet-- it's yours. That's our job: drilling, mining and stripping. Sweaters are the anti-Biblical view. Big gas-guzzling cars with phones and CD players and wet bars--- that's the Biblical view."

"I think we ought to nuke North Korea right now just to give the rest of the world a warning...They're a major threat, I just think it would be fun to nuke them and have it be a warning to the rest of the world."

"Canadians better hope the United States doesn't roll over one night and crush them. They are lucky we allow them to exist on the same continent."

The streak of hate and violence in these quotes shows no boundaries whether it is the Earth or it's inhabitants. That in itself makes me wonder the "Christian values" she so heartily professes. I was always under the impression that Christianity was a forgiving religion, and that the United States should practice tolerance. Did I get that all wrong... or once again, were those statements made in order to promote book sales?

"The myth of "McCarthyism is the greatest Orwellian fraud of our times. Liberals are fanatical liars, then as now. The portrayal of Senator Joe McCarthy as a wild-eyed demagogue destroying innocent lives is sheer liberal hobgoblinism. Liberals weren't hiding under the bed during the McCarthy era. They were systematically undermining the nations ability to defend itself, while waging a bellicose campaign of lies to blacken McCarthy's name."

It didn't surprise me during the course of my research to find that Coulter was a staunch defender of Joseph McCarthy. During the 1950's McCarthy used every tactic in order to blackball and blacklist any Americans who at one time might have been a member of the Communist Party. At the time America was fearful of Communists, and they were the target of hate. The Hollywood community was the biggest target of McCarthys wrath, and over 300 actors, writers and bit players lives were destroyed during this witch-hunt. It all came to a stop through the actions of Edward R. Murrow's telecast that showed McCarthy's tactics had no credible evidence to back up his lies, as well as a statement from the Army Attorney General Joseph Welch's declaration: "Have you no sense of decency?"
To this day, Coulter has failed to address McCarthy's fundamental inability to actually identify even a single communist operating within the United States.

So.... MS. Coulter, have YOU no sense of decency? Attacks, lies, mud-racking and name calling all remind of of the witch-hunts of the 1600's we still laugh about today. The fact that we live in the United States grants us the opportunity to accept tolerance... it says so in the first amendment, if you read between the lines a little better. But then your quote: "Liberals are always accusing us of repressing their speech. I say let's do it. Let's repress them. Frankly, I'm not a fan of the first amendment" tells me much more of who you are. Your "free speech" ideals are only worthy of your remarks, and anyone who opposes them should be repressed. Hmmmmm..... last time I looked, I lived in the United States where I had a Constitution that gave me the right to believe and speak freely. Oh yeah, wait, I can still do that, but will have to suffer a backlash of your "Christian values" on the very amendment you are not a fan of yourself. ????? Am I missing something here? Maybe so, after all, I'm a liberal.... you know, the American citizen who has just a few more brain cells than a toaster.

2006-06-09T08:00:00.000-04:00

addicted to blogger......

So you go a few days without connecting to blogger, and you feel cut off from the world... or at least the little world you built up here on the computer screen. You go in to read and comment, and poof!.... a big warning appears where the comment box should be. You've been dealt an expired page that issues instructions on how to refresh, or check your toolbar. This, all after a nice comment that may have taken some time to compose, now belongs to cyberspace.

So what is it that makes us come back all through the day to check on the status of blogsphere? Is it the fact that an inherent need for man to communicate with another is a strong desire, or a genuine care for a community that we have built up for ourselves? Perhaps it also includes a need for people to keep caught up on the daily news through a non-professional medium. But if you ask me, I find that a lot of people who use this format, are more worthy of a journalism degree than most of the news I can get through regular TV. What makes it more interesting is that we can meet people from all around the world we otherwise might never have met. That in itself has been the gravy on my mashed potatoes.

The vast varieties of blogs make it the most interesting to keep in touch because you can travel through and read anything from politics to pure rants, poetry to fiction, and personal daily material. Somehow we can get caught up in all of it, and take it more personally ourselves just for having to have gotten to know the authors. They have become friends, and in many cases, part family. How interesting and unusual this should come about, for if you really look at the bottom line, we have raised the status of "pen pal" to a new global height.

This was nothing that I was the least bit interested in last summer. Heck, I didn't even know blogs existed. I started reading my nephews blog on a daily basis for the humor and wit he can display so well. When he took a small hiatus, a reader of his started his own blog, and I jumped over there to read and comment. Signing in anonymously, the reader recognized me, and explained how I could become more involved by starting my own blog. Taking me completely under his wing, he set up my account and kept in touch with me through the whole process. What intrigued me the most, was that one of his commenters was a "neighbor" of mine from New England. I wanted so much to speak to her because I enjoyed her posts, and felt we had so much in common. It has turned out to be another great friend I would make in this world, because my gut feeling was right.

One thing led to another, and I was meeting new people scattered from Canada to New Zealand. This wouldn't have been possible on my own.... as I don't have the time to physically visit all these locations, but through the sharing of their stories and pictures I can take myself out of my office for a short visit to another part of the world without ever making a plane reservation. In short, I have become a voyager on a mind-expanding journey. I am addicted to the daily happenings of the people I meet here. I may not always be able to think of things to say and respond to after reading, and sometimes have to put it to the side to carry on with real life, but it is something I carry in my mind through the day. It is an addicting process, because the need for human touch is so precarious and precious; it's what keeps me coming back.

So lately, my posts and comments have been few and far between.... and it's not because I can't find anything interesting to read. I've experienced some problems with blogger.... but then haven't we all? And I decided I needed to take a short hiatus and get a few things done myself, as I started to fall horribly behind in my life. I still log on everyday to read... I can't bear to take that part of my day away from myself, but sometimes I just can't find the right words to express as a response. Nor can I find the right format for my daily rants. I've landed on "Writers Block" island with many ideas, just not enough cohesiveness to put it all together. But like any addiction, I can't tear myself away to completely abandon the project. Nor do I want to. Some addictions are good for you, and this is one of them.

Many thanks to all of you who come to read here, and life will return to normal on my little part of the screen soon. After all, you are the best addiction I've had yet!

2006-06-06T17:35:00.000-04:00

five things...........

A hearty thanks to Lee Ann for making my post today. Trying to put thoughts together to come up with a meaningful post was an impossible feat, and she made my life easier by tagging me with "five things". So here goes:

5 things in my fridge:

1) Skim milk (I bought 3 gallons on Sunday, and am down to one now... and it's only Tuesday)
2) Fresh fruit (strawberries, pineapple, raspberries, blackberries, bananas)
3) Iced Tea (and no southern home is respectable without at least a gallon)
4) Salad fixings (mixed lettuce, red onions, cukes, shredded mozzarella cheese, homemade dressing to die for!)
5) Leftovers (and lots of them...Geez, it's time to clear that stuff out!)
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5 things in my "unusual" closet:

1) A bureau filled with clothes (jeans, shorts, sweaters)
2) A bookcase (filled with rare and favorite books)
3) A few hanging clothes (and I mean a few! All my little size 1 clothes are packed in bins, as they'll never see the light of day again... boo hoo!)
4) Pictures on the walls (mostly of my son when he was little... and oh so cute!)
5) One pair of shoes (I only have a total of four, and I leave them by the doors mostly)
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5 things in my car:

1) My cruise card (to get me through the toll faster than everybody else)
2) A plastic container (it's my mini-desk that holds deposit slips, rubber stamp, and calculator for when I go from the post office to the bank without stopping at home first. I try to minimize my outings as much as possible)
3) A cart for transporting catering bins
4) My sunglasses (and I have more pairs of those than I do shoes)
5) My CD'S (which can no longer be played until my CD player gets fixed)
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5 things in my purse:

Ok, this one is officially hard, as my purse holds my life, and everything about it. I have a minimum of 500 things in there....

The short version:
1) My wallet (which cannot be shut due to all the coupons, credit cards, store bonus cards, license, very little money, and receipts it holds)
2) A small medical repair kit (it contains tums, gum, and aspirin)
3) Address book (mini, but oh so handy!)
4) Checkbook
5) Eyeglass case (even though most of the time they are on the top of my head.... I only need them for reading, not driving)
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So many thanks to Lee Ann for tagging me. These are always a lot of fun, although I have a hard time limiting my numbers. I am, by nature, a pack-rat.... albeit an organized one. My house is tiny, but well filled, although you'd never really know it because I can pack well. And when it gets to be too much, I make the necessary run to Goodwill to drop it all off. Of course, I do make a trip in to repurchase "new" items, which kind of negates the process. But go ahead and ask my brother Karl.... he'll tell you how neat I am!

2006-06-04T22:20:00.000-04:00

a busy bee...........

Here I sit at the cusp of Sunday night and reflect the weekend that sped by. It is a time to cross off the chores from the honey-do list, as well as contemplate the accomplishments. The list was very long this time, but somehow still manageable enough to draw a black line through everything, and close the file on the first weekend of June as "mission accomplished"!

For a year I've promised my neighbor that I would stain her deck, but had to keep putting it off due to the demands of my business, that always has to come first. Feeling very guilty that I had let a few weekends slip by that I could have finished this job, I finally marked the calendar as "Meg- day", and pulled all my tools together so that there was no backing out.... mostly due to laziness and a want of curling up in front of a good movie on TV. I ventured over to her house on Saturday, went to work scrubbing her deck from the icky green that had grown in the shady spots, and allowed it to dry enough so that the new stain had a chance of setting properly. It didn't take as long as I thought it would, and I was able to get a nice sunburn on my shoulders and face. Thank goodness hubby isn't afraid of heights, as he had ladder patrol ( her deck is pretty high up), and it cut the time in half for me. Talking about it later, we both agreed that we did feel better for doing something for somebody else, because it made her so happy. That in turn made us feel great. We also went back today and power-washed the front of her house and garage doors, making her house look brand new. She was thrilled and wanted to pay us, but I turned her down flat. She has always been a great neighbor, and always available in any emergencies... how could I possibly take money from her? I am happy knowing that she is pleased with everything.

Doing good deeds in turn brings great tidings, the Karma Gods take great notice of that and reward well. Not wanting to make dinner, we decided to make a run to the local Firehouse Subs, with a little stop at Lowes on the way. I was able to find some abandoned impatiens in the back of the nursery for 50 cents a 6-pack, and rescued them for my gardens. With plenty of water (as they are thirsty buggers for sure) I can bring them right back to life, and the gardens will be full of color in just a few short weeks. I should know better than to walk into any nursery as I want to rescue everything.... but my yard is only so big, and I tend to forget that when lost amongst the rows of flowers and bushes. I'm like Ulysses to the sirens songs when there....so very difficult to resist the lyrical pull......

Still having enough time in the weekend, I was able to plant everything, go grocery shopping, clean my house from top to bottom, laundry, and catch up catering write-ups I've put to the side. Now all I have left to do is catch up in blog-world..... but I'll need more hours for that. In the meantime, I need a good hot shower, some necessary zzzzz's, time to think of responses to the blogs I've read, and a cup of hot tea. I think I'll save that all for Monday. Right now, I need to be the little bee in the picture above........

I hope everyone had as wonderful weekend as I did!

2006-06-01T16:15:00.000-04:00

talking to myself......

For all the tasks I should be doing today, I contemplate the fact that I am not quite in the mood to accomplish these feats. The month of May took a lot of time away from me.... and by the looks of my messy house covered with dust, I shudder to think that I can find the energy it takes to give it a good clean sweep. But I will. It's a mind over matter obstacle, no doubt.... and it's all I will contemplate until I actually get it done. Finding the door I need to open, for I already have the key safely tucked into my hand, I will muster the motivation needed for such a request. This includes many long talks to myself, which I don't find crazy in the least. I do it all the time.

So what holds me back? Perhaps it is a yearning to have a few real days off (in a row) so that I could go away and forget about the list of chores that keeps nagging in the back of my mind. It's not like my house is falling apart by the seams, or that the world (or my business) will fall apart if I'm not around. I am the one holding me back, and I darn well know it. In my spare (and not so spare) time, I daydream about vacationing at the beach. Listening to the waves slap against the shore, laughing at the seagulls as they fight over a morsel of food left on the grains of sand, and soaking in the rays of the bright sun. This is my flight away from the usual dredges of everyday life so that I can come back and look at my "now" life with refreshed abundance.

If ever I was in need of time away, it would be now.... but then I say that every year in May. Working for a living has it's share of good ethics, but a vacation allows your mind and spirit to put life aside long enough to kick off your shoes and let down your hair. Carefree moments of waking up at any time you deem, to eat or not to eat, and to play amongst the day like a person of independent wealth, are the moments I work for all year long. But then, doesn't everybody? Most of mine are imaginary ones played through my mind in the few stolen moments of quiet..... or the ones I make up when I plead "docters appointment" and really go see "Dr. Shopping".

How unfair it seems to be able to only do this real vacation dance one week a year (that's all I get.... honestly!) I am a firm believer that we should have four weeks off a year.... one for each season. In that way, we are able to imbue the fruits of life while savoring our sanity. After all, we are no fun as people when we are cranky, overworked and overtired. A gentle time out works as well for an adult as it does for a child. It's a re-grouping time worthy of indulgence.

But here I will sit with a few moments of unmonitored daydreaming luxury, plotting my escape, still knowing full well the list in my mind will demand more attention... and probably get it. This weekend will mark the first two days off I will have in a row since Easter that I will not have to cater food to some uncharted part of town. I will not bother to write this honey-do list from my head to paper, because that will imply an actuality of impending intent. Instead, I will keep the list in the mental filing room..... and get to it IF I want or can get to it. The dust is not going anywhere, that's for sure, and the gardens are all planted.... except for a few pulled flowers that the squirrels decided to risk the cayenne pepper for. Instead, I have decided to give up my time for a promise I made to my neighbor last year to stain her deck. I won't hear the slapping waves of the ocean, nor hear the seagulls caw in mid air... but I will get to enjoy the sunshine, and perhaps put some color back into my pale skin. A small price to pay to a neighbor who has been wonderful to me.... and a promise I will keep to her husband I made 10 years ago when he died. I will be neighborly to her needs, and put my own aside for a little while longer.

The beach will always be there, vacation is somewhat close on the horizon anyway, and I'm going to feel better doing something nice for someone else. That's enough vacation for me this weekend. Maybe my house can wait a little longer.... it's survived this May with minimal attention so what's another week, right? And now that I've convinced myself of the right thing to do first, I'd better pick up that dust rag and make a swing around the house. Like I said earlier, it's not going anywhere.... but it really needs to.

See talking to yourself really works ..... I'm feeling energized already! What a difference a vacation makes!

2006-05-31T00:00:00.000-04:00

the threshold of life...........

Chances are unlikely that I will ever be asked to give a commencement speech. I am not an important enough celebrity, with any uber knowledge on any subject that would make me worthy of such a request. I am a plain, hard-working citizen of earth the learned everything in the "school of hard knocks". There are no commencement services at this school of learning, and no real graduation day to celebrate the end of an era. It's an on-going journey that I call life. It's what happened to me while I was busy making other plans.

The experience gained through the journey is more than I could have expected; the path ever-changing, and the time lightning fast. I hardly believe that it's been 31 years since my own high school graduation... but I've never stopped learning. It's been an ongoing process that seduced, with it's medusa-like tendrils, a knowledge gene to always want to know more. The "why" of life. Thirty-one years later, I still question this "why" factor, but I have a better handle on the answers than I once did. Moving past the naivete' of my teenage years, where I thought then that I possessed the secret to lifes mysteries, I find myself in this new pasture of middle age. Experience along the way altered many of the answers of my youth; I can see clearer and wider than the confines of my own mind, and self-education is key to surviving the path of life.

As the graduates of the Class of 2006 enter yet another rite of passage, I wish them well, and leave them with a few lessons I've learned while walking down the yellow brick road:

~Life is rough, tough, and full of bumpy roads. It never really gets easier, and many times it's just plain not fair. It is the attitude deriven from the curve balls that test the spirit, and show the character within.... a lesson that takes many years to develop. Get yourself over that hump as fast as you can, and develop relationships with people who will build you a foundation of solid friendships. They will ease the heavy moments, and encourage the strengths for you gather momentum in your quest for inner peace.

~High School is just a stepping stone, college a temporary dropping-by spot. You will learn more as you step further away from the friends you had in school, and new peer pressures will tempt you to do things you were always told to be cautious about while under your parents supervision. Play those games smart. Too many times we parents read horrifying stories of over-indulgence; be it behind the wheel of a car, or frat parties. No one will ever remember if you drank 5 beers, but they will remember a trip to the emergency room if you drank 50 and passed out. Having a brain-dead child was not what we envisioned for you when we cuddled you at night and read you stories. Our job was to see you safely through the difficult learning years, and get you safely into adulthood. Please don't break our hearts with foolish decisions.

~Maid service is officially over. It is now time for you to learn how to truly take care of yourself with chores that require you to learn how to: do your own laundry, pay bills, shop for groceries, balance your checkbook, make your own appointments for the doctor, and budget your time and money. It's a tall order, yes, but we've been doing it for years and know that practice makes perfect..... and whether you like it or not, you have to learn it too. You've been telling us that you're all grown up..... well this is where you start learning the real facts of life.

~As far as possible, learn to be wise in your choices. We all have gut feelings, as they were the teachings of our youth. Learn how to read them better. This applies to relationships, job opportunities, and dealing with difficult situations. Sure, we all make mistakes, but the point is to learn by them. This, too, takes many years to master, but is well worth the effort if you start in your youth. The road IS bumpy, but a good set of shock-absorbers makes it less rattling to the soul.

~Never lose your inner child of wonderment and learning. There are plenty of books published on all subjects and ideas that man has had since the beginning of time. They may not all apply but many contain the wisdom of the brilliant writers and sages. It's pretty much a guarantee you will find a path that is akin to your soul, and beliefs through this knowledge... be willing to quantify this.

~Trust in a higher power than yourself, whatever you conceive Him, Her, It to be. Having faith is having hope, having hope is having a voice, and having a voice from your soul means that all possibilities are endless. We live in a free society that depends on the voice of the people... spoken from the heart and souls of the individuals. Use that voice wisely, as it does affect history, and it's something you will pass down to your children someday.

~Get involved with issues to make the world a better place to dwell in. Don't be a "me" person, be an "us" person. This is the tallest order of all, as we need to temper progeny with sound and reasonable exercise. Remember, he who shouts loudest is not always right just because he yelled louder. To state your purpose and argue your point takes a great degree of intelligence, a sound mind, and solid facts.

~Lastly, never give up, no matter the rains of disappointment that seem to dissolve your resolve. A survivor always looks to tomorrow, no matter how bleak the circumstances ahead of them. Your lifeboat is more floatable if you learn to remove the sharp objects. Stormy seas are a fact of life (remember earlier when I told you it's just not fair sometimes), but learning to navigate the waves greatly improves your chances of staying afloat. Trust in yourself, you are smarter than you, or we, think you are.

May all the graduates who embark upon the real world in the next few weeks fulfill the hopes and dreams of their souls. It's what we as their parents told them all through their youth: You can be anything you want to be, but it does require that you need to work at it, and re-invent yourself from time to time to keep up with the changing tides.
Being at the threshold is the opportunity we middle-agers wish we could recapture... with all the knowledge we have now. A lifetime of good is all at the fingertips of our youth. Let it be our quest to encourage that in them.... they are deserving of it, as they are our future.

2006-05-30T07:15:00.000-04:00

sadly, a first for me........

I've often said that being a caterer is a much more rewarding job than to be an everyday server at a restaurant. When you cater a party, all guests are geared for party mood, and all people look forward to the events of the celebration, especially if it's a wedding. Beer, wine and alcohol flow freely; food is served with aplomb, and the decorations will put you in the spirit, regardless of the status to your invite. You don't necessarily have to be a family member to have a great time, because the music invites all to sway to the festivities as well as wish the new couple well.

Or so I thought.

This past weekend I had the opportunity to cater a "memorial" wedding located at an event facility that I regularly cater at. I can do my job at this place in my sleep.... that's how well run things go for us here. I had met the bride a few months back while at the facility when she came in to look the place over, and I had been there to set up for another wedding taking place that day. She loved what she had seen, and wanted to meet with me further to do a taste-testing and talk over details. No problem.... since that is all part of my service. I would meet with her and her fiance' within a few weeks to work out all details and settle on a menu to fit the specifications of all "special needs" guests. She was lovely.... and I mean that in more ways than one. Not only was her personality even-keeled, she was a beautiful girl, and very easy to work with. Her fiance' was just as nice, and my thought was that this was another carefree job . Yay.... I love the smooth ones, as my night goes by fast and everyone is happy.... just the way we need them to happen: no "blooper" moments.

The night proceeded along nicely. The bride was even lovelier in her gown, and she recognized me immediately to come up and give me a hug to say thanks for all the help I had given her in her selections. She couldn't wait to eat, as she had remembering the tasting, and had been thinking about the food all day. How nice was that?

Wanting to be attentive to all needs, we were careful to pay attention to our timeline of events. Champagne had to be poured at the tables for the toasting 20 minutes prior to the cake cutting ceremony. We were out on the floor, bottles in hand at the ready. It is here I encountered the first snag of the evening. The mother of the groom approached me on my tryst around the room to inform me that SHE had paid for the champagne..... we were to pour it right up to the brim. "AFTER ALL", she said, "I PAID FOR THIS STUFF, AND WE HAVE FOUR TOASTS TO MAKE. DON'T BE STINGY! I WANT ENOUGH CHAMPAGNE IN THOSE GLASSES SO THAT THEY WILL LAST FOR ALL FOUR TOASTS!" And for all the glasses I had already poured, I was to go back and fill them to the top. I tried to tell her that most people usually take only the obligatory sip, and almost never down the champagne, but she was adamant and told me she didn't care.... fill them up! I went back to the kitchen to make sure we had enough, as most providers of the champagne never bring enough to do that sort of thing, but found that we had plenty. I loaded up with two new bottles and returned to the table where I was in the middle of pouring, when she had encountered me. This table now starts to mock her and laugh, all the while telling me to fill everything up.... including the candle holders in the center of the table. Since I could tell that they were in a pretty festive mood, I asked them if I had made a face or been rude to the grooms mother. Oh no, they said, I handled it in a perfectly professional manner, the mother was way off base for the way she screamed at me. Feeling better, I finished the tables around the room, while also letting my partner know of the special request from the mother. Unfortunately, he had also been approached by her, and knew of the demand. No big problem.

The toasts were made, and the mother of the groom would be the last one to make the most defining toast of all. She would tell the new couple not to make the same mistake she had made in marrying.... after all she said, "This room is filled with plenty of ex-couples, so don't follow our example". It seemed a little inappropriate, but what the heck, it was all taken in stride, and the cake cutting commenced. All this time (much to my unknowledge of the events), the grooms mother was fuming, and the amount of alcohol she consumed made her temper even harder to deal with. I started to pay a little more attention to her after I had found out that she was upset with the new couple because they had dedicated a dance to the brides parents (who were a very loving couple themselves). For some reason the grooms mother was under the impression that she was not being paid enough attention to, and that the brides parents were "dissing" her.

When my partners decided to empty the overflowing garbage to the dumpster, they encountered the grooms mother yelling at her son outside, because of this non-attention, making him certainly uncomfortable to all those that were within hearing range. They were to tell me about it upon their return inside the facility. Now I kept full attention to the grooms mother, because we weren't sure what was going to happen next.

The last song was played, well-wishers blew bubbles for a mock-leave of the bride and groom into their new life together, and we started around the room to start the clean-up. Then IT happened.

The grooms mother burst through the back door of the facility screaming and yelling at the top of her lungs how she had been dissed by everyone, especially the brides parents and she wasn't going to stand for it. This discussion was started in the garden area of the facility between the groom, bride and grooms mother. When the mother came rushing through the door I heard the bride yell at her new mother-in-law, "Not everything is about you! For what you just did, I will never speak to you ever again!". And with that the bride walked across the room and out the front door. The grooms mother then proceeded to yell nasty things at the mother of the bride, which prompted the father of the bride to step in and tell his new in-law that he wasn't going to stand for his wife to be talked to that way. The mother of the groom turned around and slapped the father of the bride upside his head and told him some words I didn't quite hear, but understood they weren't nice. Two groomsmen had to hold the father of the bride back, as he lunged toward the mother of the groom, arm raised to retaliate. At this point the groom grabbed his mother and made an attempt to get her out into the front parking lot, into her car, and on her way. He was clearly embarrassed, and very angry at his mother.

Successfully scraping my mouth off the floor over this action, I watched as events unfolded I'd never seen at a wedding before. I was speechless, as was the bartender who grabbed me into the kitchen. My first order of business was to inform the facility coordinator of the happenings, but I did not readily see her. Walking out the front door after the grooms mother was escorted out, I came across the coordinator. Since she had witnessed the grooms mother being taken out kicking and screaming, she decided that the situation was taken care of by the wedding party, and there was no sense making a bad situation worse by interfering.

The evening did end, but I could not help feeling that this couple was in for a lot of problems due to the jealousy of the grooms mother. They would now be in a fight for their lifetime over any and all holidays, children born out of the marriage, and any family gatherings. Because of the nature of the brides parents, I don't foresee problems stemming from them, but rather from the grooms mother. I also couldn't help but feel that this woman (and notice I didn't use the word lady), was horrible to have pulled such a stunt at her own sons wedding. She forgot the one rule of a wedding day: It's the BRIDES day. If you can't play nice in polite company, then you shouldn't expect to be asked to play at all. Sadly, I know she'll never get the point on that.
I was sad to think of the problems that would stem out of this one event, but as I watched the bride and groom handle the situation, I saw the power of their love. I wished them a silent "love freshened anew", and hoped they would remember this bond during the tough times of their future together. They certainly have a bumpy road through no fault of their own.

Discussing the events of the evening with the bartender, DJ, and wedding coordinator, I couldn't help but feel that this was the first time I had ever witnessed anything like this. It turned out, it was a "first" for all of us. For a day that is supposed to be filled with love and togetherness, it was sad to see it tarnished over such a silly reason, and I hope to never witness another. I don't see it as a good way to start a new life as husband and wife. And if I were really superstitious, I might see it as a bad omen.

Good luck to you Ted and Christina.... you will need lots of it!

2006-05-26T14:55:00.000-04:00

a memorial weekend.....

Somewhere between the grilling out and the picnics we will enjoy this weekend, a moment should be taken to remember the troops who will not be able to share their time with us any longer. A moment when we remember the reason for this weekend other than having three consecutive days off. We may not agree with this war, or the administration that put us there, but it should not lesson the debt we owe to the men and women who set off to battle in order to secure the very freedoms we have. May our current troops come home safely, and may the world come together to celebrate peace as it should be.

2006-05-25T15:40:00.000-04:00

the enemy......

In every war, it is only a matter of showing the enemy who's tougher, while gaining real estate in the process. Fancier tactics are now used as technology has become sophisticated, and it is even possible to eradicate the enemy without showing up any more to do the manual fighting. Plans are layed, weapons are stocked, and soldiers are on the ready... it's merely a matter of timing to be sure the enemy is in range... then KAPOW, the war has begun.

To say that casualties will be kept at a minimum is not a guarantee one can promise... it can only be hoped that there will be few to no bodies to escort off the battlefield once the real fighting begins. It's not an easy quest, and most leaders have had their share of battle scars. It's a haunting vision, and not for the weak of stomach. It's a job nobody really wants, but someone must assume in order to further their way of life over the machinations of the enemy they are faced with.

Am I talking about the war in Iraq? No.... not at all. I am talking about squirrels... specifically the ones who have invaded my yard ever since Miss Kitty moved to Florida. Oh yeah, they are cute and fuzzy... and make the cutest moves and noises. The are also a nuisance. Through some squirrel tele-networking that they possess, word has gotten out that the maple trees in my yard are filled with condo areas waiting to be occupied by any available yard rodent in the area or from miles around. To say that they have moved in in droves is an understatement. I have been invaded! And why not? My yard is filled with tasty flowers for them to gnaw on, the birdbaths are all filled with clean water to drink, and housing is at a premium..... it's the perfect garden of eden.

With no hunter to keep them at bay, they jump from tree to tree laughing at my inability to do any more than scare them off temporarily. Oh sure, you think, squirrels can't laugh... but I'm here to attest that they have those big cheeks just for that reason. It's the pointing at me while they are laughing that is really beginning to test my patience, along with the fact that they have decided to dig up all my plantings. Everyday I encounter new invaded pots of flowers with fresh gnaw marks at the roots. I have planted over 100 new flowers in the yard that I must systematically re-plant when they dig them out. It's annoying, I tell you... and I have to declare war whether I want to or not. If they were paying some form of rent, I might be a little easier on the buggers, but this is my real estate that I've worked so hard to preserve. It's time to get tough with them.... I'm just not sure how.

I've been told that this is the mating season for squirrels right now... the reason why they are acting so "squirrelly" and rambunctious. Hmmm..... they always act squirrelly to me. Have you ever noticed one crossing the street. It's like they have a hard time making up their mind as to which direction they were headed in the first place. They start halfway over, stop, turn around, look around, hop a bit, stop, look around, hop some more, turn back and go 1/4 of the way, then stop and turn around again..... it's an endless decision for them. Perhaps that's why we do see a lot of the undecided ones as road kill. Chipmunks on the other hand are scurriers. Once the decision is made to cross the street, it's off they go. You rarely see a deceased chipmunk.... but always see the familiar squirrels as part of the pavement.

Now I'm not saying I want to run them over.... I detest killing of any sort. I am more likely to get butted from the back by an over-eager driver up my rear end for slowing down to let these animals get safely to the other side (and this equasion would include bunnies, possums and raccoons). I need to find a way for these pesky rodents to leave my plantings alone. It has been suggested that I should use cayenne pepper in the soil, or put out mothballs, but I'm not sure that is a workable solution. Besides, I hate the smell of mothballs.... and cayenne pepper seems cruel.

Does anybody have any suggestions that have worked effectively for them? I need a good game-plan that allows me to go on about my life ( in essence: not showing up for the war), while allowing my flowers to reach some sort of maturity. (I notice that they don't bother the bigger plants.) I'm not so good at this war thing, because I detest deceased bodies laying around, and do not have the stomach to chuck them off into squirrel heaven.... that's a job for hubby anyway.
I just want them to go about their life while leaving my new flowers alone. They are welcome to all the water they can drink, as well as all the birdseed that gets tossed to the ground from the birdfeeders.... but that's where my hospitality ends. Darned pesky yard rats!

2006-05-23T15:40:00.000-04:00

a.w.o.l.

Has it really been a week since I posted last? My, my, my, how time travels fast when you are having so much fun....

Actually it's been a hell of a week for me... hence the lack of posts on my part. It started with a bang of caterings that kept us so busy, I could barely keep them all apart for all the equipment that needed to be stored and packed. I am glad to be an organized person for the most part, as I make lists of everything. This becomes most helpful when it comes to knowing what I have, what need and, what I need to get. It has saved me many times ..... as long as I can remember where I leave the lists.

We were supposed to be fairly quiet, then it seemed that everyone remembered that they needed food, or their previous caterer was a.w.o.l. A few moments of letting their fingers do the walking, they arrived on the page of our ad, and decided to give us a try. What started as three caterings for the weekend turned into eight. Yup, it looked like I was going to be able to pay my bills early with the potential dough that was going to roll in; although much work had to go into all the planning in a very short amount of time, and I had to be up to the task. I was, and everything went off as well planned as it could possibly go.... with only a few snags here and there, nothing that anyone else knew about but myself.

Luckily it happened while I was on the last catering of the weekend, and had a staff of ten people helping serve 160 people table-side service.... rather than buffet-style service. It was upon their request that a buffet wasn't present, as they wanted their people to stay in their chairs, and have us wait on them. It did go off beautifully as it was supposed to, but by the end of the night I heard the familiar barking of my feet, and was overly anxious to get home after mopping their kitchen floor. Too tired to do that final walk-thru to see if we left anything behind, I hung the mop up and proceeded out the door to my vehicle. I was only 10 minutes away from home, and still in enough time to catch the season finale of Desperate Housewives. I put my truck into auto-drive ( a feature I highly recommend for every vehicle), and took a mind wandering jog over the nights events. Happy that I could pat myself on the back over such a fruitful job with lots of praise from the participants, I pulled into my driveway, ran into the house and threw off the shoes, pants and shirt to climb into shorts and a T-shirt. I immediately felt better, and the cool night air gave me a feeling of relief that the weekend was officially over; I could relax until 6 AM Monday morning where I started all over again with boxed lunches for 60 people.

It wasn't until 7 AM Monday morning when I was headed out of my house to the kitchen that I remembered I hadn't carried my "repair-kit" bag out of the event facility from the night before. In here I store all the little stuff I might need during the event, but don't want to walk out to my vehicle to get. This usually includes a comb, hair spray (for those loose strands that always seem to fall down in front of my eyes), toothpaste and brush, my keys and my cell phone. I tried calling my cell phone, hoping that it might have fallen out of my purse in the truck, but no, I had left it in the bag this time. I purposely leave my keys in the bag, because it is one way for me to remember my bag, but this time I had taken the keys out to go back to the truck to get something, and instead of returning them to the bag, I slipped them into my apron pocket. Big boo-boo on my part! Now the cell phone was a.w.o.l. Geez..... my bad, huh? Calling the facility the next day, I was able to get back in to find the bag. The only problem was that it wasn't where I had left it. A check to the lost and found revealed nothing, and a return trip to their kitchen to look in every corner finally met with success. I felt 20 pounds lighter in relief alone. I could have forfeited the bag and it contents, if it were not for the cell phone.

All this time, I was feeling funny.... and not the "ha-ha" kind, but funny in a weird way. I literally could feel my skin crawl with itching, my lips had taken on a new fullness, and I was lightheaded . Not prone to fainting or any of that silliness, I felt that perhaps I was a bit overtired, so I took a few hours in the afternoon off to take a much needed "real" nap. Yup, that's what it had to be.... I was overtired, and just needed some uniterrupted sleep to put me back on top of my game. I woke up many hours later (and thank goodness the phone was quiet all that time) only to feel that I wasn't in any better of shape. I was actually even more tired and itchier than before. The backs of my legs were rubbed raw, my right knee-cap and arm had welts, my lips had grown and were the size of being hit by a 99-mile an hour baseball, and my muscles were very sore. I still had no reason to base this affliction on, and being a trooper, I had a lot of laundry to do as well as work to catch up on. So on I plodded, not working very fast, but effectively getting done the mental list I had put together to end the day at 11:00 PM.

And then came this morning..... the itching was worse, the welts worse, but my lips had receded a bit. Oh well, nothing like a hot shower to wash it all away, huh? Well, sort of.
I felt like I had a bad sunburn and the shower did nothing to alleviate the itching, but actually made it worse. By the time I made it to my kitchen this morning, the welts were worse, the itching uncontrollable, and my lips were beginning to grow again. My partner noticed it right away. He went to his car and pulled out a bottle of benedryl and told me to take some, at least the itching would come under control. I asked him to read the back of the bottle as I was sure that this was going to make me drowsy (and I was too lazy to walk to my truck to get my glasses to read it myself). I could only imagine it would say something to the effect that once taking this product, one should never handle machinery, drive, or even attempt to think. "Oh no", he said, "Take it.... what's more important is that you stop itching." Remind me to not be so lazy next time and get those glasses, as I started to get drowsy.... real drowsy. I found reasons to do something, just to keep my mind going, because I could not think a coherent thought in my brain otherwise. Simple tasks proved to be stressful, and I was giddy as well. On the plus side, the itching did cease. I couldn't wait to get home again, as I really needed to lay down; that was the first order of business once I crossed the threshold of my home. All housework, yardwork and thinking would have to wait till I was in a better frame of mind.

So here I am at the end of a much needed nap, again, and not really feeling any better. The itching has receded a bit, the rawness to my legs is not as bad, but I am still lightheaded. Just writing this post has been a challenge in spelling and skill. I can't believe I've made as many errors as I have (you should have seen this before I re-read every part twice); even simple words were hard to spell in my head..... and since my spell-check is on permanent a.w.o.l. status, this has been quite an exercise in patience for me. Hmmmm..... good thing I'm still on those pills that Dr. Teddy prescribed. At least I don't feel like I need to take anybodys head off while I'm scratching away..... I'm actually in a good frame of mind for someone who is suffering a series of unfortunate events.